Horses and Courses.
Saving a mare from certain death.21 total reviews
Comment from nancy_e_davis
This is a wonderful story Kay. My husband and I saved many abused horses over the years. They are indeed very loyal and loving if you treat them well. You were very brave standing up to that terrible greedy man. Well done! Nancy
reply by the author on 29-Jul-2014
  |
This is a wonderful story Kay. My husband and I saved many abused horses over the years. They are indeed very loyal and loving if you treat them well. You were very brave standing up to that terrible greedy man. Well done! Nancy
Comment Written 29-Jul-2014
reply by the author on 29-Jul-2014
-
Hello Nancy, Thanks so much for reading and the six star rating. Once a horse-lover, always a horse-lover. He was a real bad man. His first stint in jail (before I met him) was for raping a 14yr old girl. Bless you, Kay.
Comment from gypsycaravan
My physiotherapist had encouraged me to get back on a horse to strengthen my little-used muscles, lying in a hospital bed for three months had made me physically very weak and of course I had lost my left leg. (This sentence runs on without the proper flow. I suggest ( My physiotherapist (delete 'had) encouraged me to get back on a horse to strengthen my little-used muscles (delete comma, insert period) (Start a new sentence) Lying in a hospital bed for three months (delete 'had') made me physically very weak (insert 'comma') (delete "and of course I had lost') (insert along with the loss of ') Passage would then read like this: My physiotherapist encouraged me to get back on a horse to strengthen my little-used muscles. Lying in a hospital bed for three months made me physically very weak, along with the loss of my left leg. You use passive sentence structure throughout making your great story weak. Try to get rid of all the "had mades, had seems, had beens" and use action verbs, instead. You have a story that evokes emotion and your character development is strong. Good work.
"shopping him over the cheque."---unsure what this means.
reply by the author on 29-Jul-2014
 |
My physiotherapist had encouraged me to get back on a horse to strengthen my little-used muscles, lying in a hospital bed for three months had made me physically very weak and of course I had lost my left leg. (This sentence runs on without the proper flow. I suggest ( My physiotherapist (delete 'had) encouraged me to get back on a horse to strengthen my little-used muscles (delete comma, insert period) (Start a new sentence) Lying in a hospital bed for three months (delete 'had') made me physically very weak (insert 'comma') (delete "and of course I had lost') (insert along with the loss of ') Passage would then read like this: My physiotherapist encouraged me to get back on a horse to strengthen my little-used muscles. Lying in a hospital bed for three months made me physically very weak, along with the loss of my left leg. You use passive sentence structure throughout making your great story weak. Try to get rid of all the "had mades, had seems, had beens" and use action verbs, instead. You have a story that evokes emotion and your character development is strong. Good work.
"shopping him over the cheque."---unsure what this means.
Comment Written 29-Jul-2014
reply by the author on 29-Jul-2014
-
Shopping him over the cheque is an English way of saying turning him in to the police. Thank you for reading and your in-depth review. Cheers, Kay.
Comment from Nosha17
You certainly are one very brave, tough lady. I am so glad it worked out OK and you nabbed that idiot. The horses sound very lovely, you will be well rewarded by their loyalty and love. My next posting will have ponies in it, funnily enough. Super picture, good dialogue, narrative and good luck in the contest. Faye
reply by the author on 29-Jul-2014
|
You certainly are one very brave, tough lady. I am so glad it worked out OK and you nabbed that idiot. The horses sound very lovely, you will be well rewarded by their loyalty and love. My next posting will have ponies in it, funnily enough. Super picture, good dialogue, narrative and good luck in the contest. Faye
Comment Written 29-Jul-2014
reply by the author on 29-Jul-2014
-
Hello Faye, Thank you so much for reading and glad you enjoyed my story. I will look for your ponies! Bless you, Kay.
Comment from Sandra Stoner-Mitchell
Kay, that was a beautiful story, all the more so because it was true. I cannot for the life of me understand people who are cruel to animals, they give us more love than any human can, all they need is a little bit of love and care and they are yours for life. I am so pleased you rescued her. Good luck in the contest, my friend, it is really lovely. xsx sandra
reply by the author on 29-Jul-2014
|
Kay, that was a beautiful story, all the more so because it was true. I cannot for the life of me understand people who are cruel to animals, they give us more love than any human can, all they need is a little bit of love and care and they are yours for life. I am so pleased you rescued her. Good luck in the contest, my friend, it is really lovely. xsx sandra
Comment Written 29-Jul-2014
reply by the author on 29-Jul-2014
-
Hello my friend, Thanks so much for reading and glad you enjoyed. The six stars were welcome. Cheers, Kay XX
Comment from mumsyone
A wonderful story, Kay, well told. I pity people who have no love for animals. They don't know what they're missing. I wish you all the best in the contest! I think this has a very good chance of winning.
Hugs,
Lois
reply by the author on 29-Jul-2014
|
A wonderful story, Kay, well told. I pity people who have no love for animals. They don't know what they're missing. I wish you all the best in the contest! I think this has a very good chance of winning.
Hugs,
Lois
Comment Written 29-Jul-2014
reply by the author on 29-Jul-2014
-
Hello my dear friend, Thanks so much for reading and glad you enjoyed my story. Bless you girl XX Kay.
Comment from royowen
A beautiful story Kaye, I have an affection for these beautiful creatures, big and powerful yet gentle and loyal, and respond to kindness, this story played my heart strings, well written story, this is the first story I have read of yours and I'm impressed! Well done, well written descriptively expressive, an enjoyable read! Blessings, Roy.
reply by the author on 29-Jul-2014
|
A beautiful story Kaye, I have an affection for these beautiful creatures, big and powerful yet gentle and loyal, and respond to kindness, this story played my heart strings, well written story, this is the first story I have read of yours and I'm impressed! Well done, well written descriptively expressive, an enjoyable read! Blessings, Roy.
Comment Written 28-Jul-2014
reply by the author on 29-Jul-2014
-
Hello Roy, Thanks for reading - I have many stories on file. Lady was a beautiful mare. Glad you enjoyed my true story. Cheers, Kay.
Comment from country ranch writer
Man deserved every day in jail for hid wrongdoings, your horse sounds like my Smokey was loving to the end, I still miss him so
reply by the author on 29-Jul-2014
|
Man deserved every day in jail for hid wrongdoings, your horse sounds like my Smokey was loving to the end, I still miss him so
Comment Written 28-Jul-2014
reply by the author on 29-Jul-2014
-
Thank you my friend - glad you liked the story. Yes, he deserved jail time. Horses are in my blood and like you, I still miss my girl today. Blessings, K.
-
horses have no protection from bullies
Comment from Cindy Warren
I'm so glad you were able to rescue that horse. Ours get hay and oats and lots of treats, and they're only ridden by family and friends. That creep kind of put me in mind of Rusty the Rustler from my Jerry Jing-Jang series. LOL I'm glad he got a little of what he deserved. They should have put him on a chain gang and fed him on grass.
reply by the author on 29-Jul-2014
|
I'm so glad you were able to rescue that horse. Ours get hay and oats and lots of treats, and they're only ridden by family and friends. That creep kind of put me in mind of Rusty the Rustler from my Jerry Jing-Jang series. LOL I'm glad he got a little of what he deserved. They should have put him on a chain gang and fed him on grass.
Comment Written 28-Jul-2014
reply by the author on 29-Jul-2014
-
Hello Cindy, Glad you enjoyed my story. I was glad he got what he deserved too. Lady was such a gentle mare. Blessings, Kay.
Comment from GeraldS
This is an excellent non-fiction narrative. As I read the piece I could feel your presence just as if you were talking to me, telling me the story yourself. I can see that you put your heart, and maybe even a little bit of your soul, on display in this biographical essay. I wish you well in the contest.
reply by the author on 29-Jul-2014
|
This is an excellent non-fiction narrative. As I read the piece I could feel your presence just as if you were talking to me, telling me the story yourself. I can see that you put your heart, and maybe even a little bit of your soul, on display in this biographical essay. I wish you well in the contest.
Comment Written 28-Jul-2014
reply by the author on 29-Jul-2014
-
Hello Gerald, You are right, whilst visualising the past, I did put my heart and soul into the story. Blessings, Kay.
Comment from chasennov
"Horses and Courses." This is a real heart-warming story you have created here. An excellent way to tell people of the struggle to save an old horse, and what whe meant to you. Good onya mate.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
reply by the author on 29-Jul-2014
|
"Horses and Courses." This is a real heart-warming story you have created here. An excellent way to tell people of the struggle to save an old horse, and what whe meant to you. Good onya mate.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 28-Jul-2014
reply by the author on 29-Jul-2014
-
Thank you for reading and glad you liked my story. Cheers, Kay.
-
You are most welcome, Kay.
