Comment from Titanx9

Excellent

bhoag, you recently reviewed a story of mine and suggested I write more in the active voice. Thanks for the heads up because after reading several chapters of your book about Rabbit's and John's misadventures, I can appreciate your suggestions because I can see the differences. Thanks. I am still enjoying Rabbit and his visits with both sets of grandparents. I love that last paragraph, it's hilarious. This was a most enjoyable read.

 Comment Written 16-Feb-2013

---

reply by the author on 16-Feb-2013

Thanks for your comments. I've been on Fs for a couple of years and have learned a lot. Regards. Bill

Comment from chasennov

Excellent

'To Kill A Fly.' This work was very well formulated allowing formal structure and a good rounding of the body to encompass a strong extension to the narrative. Well done.

 Comment Written 16-Feb-2013

---

reply by the author on 16-Feb-2013

Thanks for reading and your comments. Bill

reply by chasennov on 17-Feb-2013

You're very welcome.

Comment from Juliette Chamberlain

Excellent

I think it stands alone pretty well!
I recall reading of the adventures of Rabbit previously so was thrilled to find another one. I was not disappointed.
It is very true to life with smatterings of humour.
I saw no spags.

Juliette

 Comment Written 15-Feb-2013

---

reply by the author on 15-Feb-2013

Thank you very much Juliette, both for reading and your kind comments. Bill

Comment from Cliff Ashpaugh

Excellent

Hi bhogg. Enjoyed your story. Sounds like rascals are on the loose. Good flow and pace. Only a few minor suggestions.
With puzzled look--With a puzzled look. Grandma led us out to the patio--omit out--repetitive in the next line. The truth be known--omit, trite. You could begin to see sun waves--omit begin to. Shaking his head from side to side--omit side to side, redundant. Good job. Looking forward to reading more.

 Comment Written 15-Feb-2013

---

reply by the author on 15-Feb-2013

Hi Cliff - thanks for reading and the pointers. I made most of the changes, but some were more style differences. I much appreciate you stopping by and your willingness to help. Warm regards, Bill

Comment from Curtis Hatch

Excellent

bhogg,

I enjoyed the continuation of the adventures of Rabbit. He and John sound a little like my brother and me. With all the work to be done around a farm, it's amazing the boys had enough energy to fight, but I guess that's just something brothers do. I had never heard of cultivating praying mantis for bug control. It makes sense now that I think of it.

I enjoyed the read...it was a bit nostalgic.

Curtis

 Comment Written 15-Feb-2013

---

reply by the author on 15-Feb-2013

Hi Curtis - as you might surmise, this is posted as fiction, but much is true. My grandparents did in fact put out mantises for bug control. Way before their time! Thanks for reading and for following the story,. Regards, Bill

Comment from MumEsGirl

Excellent

I love the old fashioned feel of this work. I missed seeing Rabbit and his memories.

Our generation think they invented organic gardening but they are just returning to the tried and trusted means
hugs
kate

 Comment Written 15-Feb-2013

---

reply by the author on 15-Feb-2013

Hi Kate - As you might surmise, this is written as fiction, but mostly based on fact. My grandparents were way before their time on farming. I should include some other things which would surprise most folks. Thanks for following my story. Bill

Comment from GWHARGIS

Excellent

Can't give you a six, since it seems I have already given you two in the past thirty days. I liked the interaction with the grandma and the boys. She is matter of fact and doesn't mind telling John that he is a pain. John must either be jealous of Rabbit or he has some other issues. Nicely done. Hope the next chapter covers the call to the pope.

 Comment Written 15-Feb-2013

---

reply by the author on 15-Feb-2013

Thank you for reading. The fact that you think it merits a six is high praise to me. Warm regards, Bill

Comment from kashmayank

Excellent

I havent read all the chapters but this looks like a nicce read good thing was that it had a nice flow that added to the appeal all the best

 Comment Written 15-Feb-2013

---

reply by the author on 15-Feb-2013

Thanks for reading. I hope you have a chance to circle back. Warm regards, Bill

Comment from Dawn Munro

Excellent

This is fabulous - I love this chapter, and I learned something too. I remember reading somewhere that the praying mantis was good - now I know why. I didn't see a thing that needed any edit or change, and I loved it!

 Comment Written 14-Feb-2013

---

reply by the author on 15-Feb-2013

Thank you so much for reading. This is fiction, but lots of fact here. My grandparents were very early organic farmers. Regards, Bill

reply by Dawn Munro on 15-Feb-2013

It Was my pleasure.

Comment from Shirley B

Excellent

This is an excellent chapter. Boy, your brother is a handful!. You sound like a saint compared to him. LOL I love your chapters. They remind me of my childhood. Your imagery is excellent. I can't wait for the next chapter. Happy valentine's Day, Shirley

 Comment Written 14-Feb-2013

---

reply by the author on 15-Feb-2013

Thanks for reading Shirley. Another virtual hug your way. Don't tell your husband. John was a handful. Who would have known. He is a decorated veteran and my hero! Wasn't always that way. LOL Bill