Stranger in the Night
A girl is hesitant to open her door at night41 total reviews
Comment from Judy Lawless
This is a well-written story of suspense, Beth. I can understand it actually happening. I'm glad your daughter was cautious enough to not open her door, and recognized her good decision when the woman's attitude changed to anger. Smart girl.
reply by the author on 19-Jun-2021
This is a well-written story of suspense, Beth. I can understand it actually happening. I'm glad your daughter was cautious enough to not open her door, and recognized her good decision when the woman's attitude changed to anger. Smart girl.
Comment Written 19-Jun-2021
reply by the author on 19-Jun-2021
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Thank you so much Judy. I appreciate the review and nice comments. I'm thankful she didn't open the door. It is sad to know crooks are so willing ot play on a person sympaty to gain access to their home.
Comment from Jannypan (Jan)
What a creepy story with an excellent point made, Beth. You did a great job. There is much suspense and intrigue as to what is happening, will happen, and did happen. Your message is loud and clear. In this day and time, one cannot be too safe. Yes, call the police, but never ever open the door to strangers.
Thanks for sharing.
Respectfully, Jan
reply by the author on 19-Jun-2021
What a creepy story with an excellent point made, Beth. You did a great job. There is much suspense and intrigue as to what is happening, will happen, and did happen. Your message is loud and clear. In this day and time, one cannot be too safe. Yes, call the police, but never ever open the door to strangers.
Thanks for sharing.
Respectfully, Jan
Comment Written 19-Jun-2021
reply by the author on 19-Jun-2021
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Thank you Jan, I appreciate the review and comments. I hope this is on ruse that won't work for crooks but apparently it often does.
Beth
Comment from Sankey
Well done. A great read. Plenty of suspense and had us wondering was it a genuine need but the multiple footsteps leaving indicated she did right. No spags and good storytelling.
reply by the author on 19-Jun-2021
Well done. A great read. Plenty of suspense and had us wondering was it a genuine need but the multiple footsteps leaving indicated she did right. No spags and good storytelling.
Comment Written 19-Jun-2021
reply by the author on 19-Jun-2021
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Than you so much for the review and comments. People will trick others when they can to get them to open the door.
Beth
Comment from AnnaLinda
Wow Beth,
This is a well written story and to think that this is based on a true experience of your daughter.
She was wise to use her inner senses and not open the door and call 911.
Amazing. So she carries now? Things have only gotten worse sense then.
Thanks for resurrecting this.
Anna
reply by the author on 19-Jun-2021
Wow Beth,
This is a well written story and to think that this is based on a true experience of your daughter.
She was wise to use her inner senses and not open the door and call 911.
Amazing. So she carries now? Things have only gotten worse sense then.
Thanks for resurrecting this.
Anna
Comment Written 19-Jun-2021
reply by the author on 19-Jun-2021
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Thank you so much for the review and comments. She had a gun for a while but she doesn't like them and now she is married and living in a gated community so she doesn't feel as vulnerable.
Beth
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Good for her!
Comment from Ben Colder
I bought my wife a 38 snub nose revolver. I told her not to worry about it jamming. Just aim and pull the trigger. Hollow points will do the rest.
Good story. It was filled with suspense.
reply by the author on 19-Jun-2021
I bought my wife a 38 snub nose revolver. I told her not to worry about it jamming. Just aim and pull the trigger. Hollow points will do the rest.
Good story. It was filled with suspense.
Comment Written 19-Jun-2021
reply by the author on 19-Jun-2021
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Thanks for the review and comments. It is old one I revived. I have a pistol that we bought in 1958 when we first got married. I haven't shot it in years the ammonition is old. It takes 22's. It might explode if I try to use it. I live up a quarter of mile drive on nineteen acres of woods with no houses in site with all the trees around me. There is only one way in to my property up a one car drive. I'm pretty vulnerble living alone, but so far I've never really been afraid. I live in a 3800 sq ft house with three garages. I guess I'm nuts to stay here alone, but I don't want to move. It's home.
Beth
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It would help if you had a companion. When My Mary died 5 years ago, part of me did too. I gave most everything away to the kids but sold some. My place near the lake and in the hills I sold to my oldest daughter for almost nothing because I knew she would take care of it. So I live in an apartment alone surrounded by 11 windows. We are friends and nothing else. Some read my junk, and some don't.
I hated to have got rid of everything, but a man is different in that line of thinking. The lawn here is manicured, and I need not the responsibility.
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I got a good laugh from this. I'm sure those ll widows treat you pretty good. You said ll windows. My yard is not manacured. No one sees it so it doesn't bother me that much. My daugter's stepson lived with me several months, but he was a pain and a worry. I'd rather be alone unless of couse I had 11 widowers living around me. LOL
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Windows, I meant widows .LOL. At one time, I would rent a plane and have dinner with you, but FAA won't let me fly anymore. Health not the best and no license. So we will just keep meeting on this thing. LOL.
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That would have been an expensive dinner. I remember how much it cost to rent those planes for when my husband flew. Thank for the thought. Meeting you would be nice but then again, our friendship works well this way.
Beth
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Yes, you are probably right, although I plan to drive to Choctaw for the fair this year in Mississippi. My daughter has shown an interest . I enjoy watching the stickball games, and it would be the first for my twin grandsons to see if it is the Lord's will.
Comment from tfawcus
This is a cautionary tale indeed! I commend the way you have set out the correct steps to follow in a situation such as this. I'm sure most people would have fallen for a line like that to gain access.
Just one tiny typo to fix before the contest deadline: Lisa woke from a sound sleep. Panic gripped (gripped) her.
Good luck! I think this is a strong entry that should do well.
reply by the author on 19-Jun-2021
This is a cautionary tale indeed! I commend the way you have set out the correct steps to follow in a situation such as this. I'm sure most people would have fallen for a line like that to gain access.
Just one tiny typo to fix before the contest deadline: Lisa woke from a sound sleep. Panic gripped (gripped) her.
Good luck! I think this is a strong entry that should do well.
Comment Written 19-Jun-2021
reply by the author on 19-Jun-2021
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Thank for the review and for noticing the misspelling. This was one I recycled from about ten years ago, so the contest was back then. There are all new readers now so I thought I'd revive it.
Beth
Comment from Elizabeth Emerald
Gripping! This rude awakening makes for a brilliant hook to grab and hold through the resolution. What a stunning twist! (Which daughter lives alone--Christi?)
reply by the author on 19-Jun-2021
Gripping! This rude awakening makes for a brilliant hook to grab and hold through the resolution. What a stunning twist! (Which daughter lives alone--Christi?)
Comment Written 19-Jun-2021
reply by the author on 19-Jun-2021
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Thanks Elizabeth. This was revived from years back and the daughter living alone at the time was Connie. She is married now.
Beth
Comment from royowen
A beautifully constructed story, the plot is so well thought out, your abilities with imagination are simply very good my friend, the way with which you go about writing is something I admire about. Of course the right course to take would be some research to your story background, well done, blessings Roy
reply by the author on 19-Jun-2021
A beautifully constructed story, the plot is so well thought out, your abilities with imagination are simply very good my friend, the way with which you go about writing is something I admire about. Of course the right course to take would be some research to your story background, well done, blessings Roy
Comment Written 19-Jun-2021
reply by the author on 19-Jun-2021
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The story was one I wrote when I was on FanStory before. It is basically all true but I changed the names. Connie was living with a roommate who was out of town when this happened. Thank you for reviewing it.
Beth
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Wow incredible
Comment from sweetthanesue
very well written story which kept me intent on reading, loved the plot and goes to show women should always be careful at night in answering doors well done enjoyed reading this one.
reply by the author on 08-Mar-2011
very well written story which kept me intent on reading, loved the plot and goes to show women should always be careful at night in answering doors well done enjoyed reading this one.
Comment Written 08-Mar-2011
reply by the author on 08-Mar-2011
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Thank you so much for reading this and your generous rating. I'm so glad you enjoyed it.
Beth
Comment from missy98writer
BethShelby,
your story titled Stranger in the Night is excellently written and should do well in This Sentence Starst The Story. Your essay non-fiction was riveting. I'm glad Lisa didn't open the door. Your narrative is great with very good descriptive writing. I liked the dialogue you added. I don't blame Lisa for buying a gun. I have a nine millimeter and I can fire it. I wish you good luck in the contest. I hope Lisa is safe with her pistol by her side.
Melissa.
reply by the author on 07-Mar-2011
BethShelby,
your story titled Stranger in the Night is excellently written and should do well in This Sentence Starst The Story. Your essay non-fiction was riveting. I'm glad Lisa didn't open the door. Your narrative is great with very good descriptive writing. I liked the dialogue you added. I don't blame Lisa for buying a gun. I have a nine millimeter and I can fire it. I wish you good luck in the contest. I hope Lisa is safe with her pistol by her side.
Melissa.
Comment Written 07-Mar-2011
reply by the author on 07-Mar-2011
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Thank you so much Melissa, I think my daughter is going to be a lot more cautious. This is the second scary moment in the night for her.
Beth