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A Compilation of Short stories

Viewing comments for Chapter 164 "My Beloved Valley "
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21 total reviews 
Comment from Brett Matthew West
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First paragraph grabs attention and asks what was so unexpected about the weather?

Lost me on "put paid to that." Reckon means ended that occurrence, at least that is the context the phrase seems to imply. Must be a "valley" expression?

The running of the bulls must be exciting.

There is no life like a small villa. As far as I am concerned it is the best way of life.

 Comment Written 01-Sep-2023


reply by the author on 01-Sep-2023
    Thank you so very much. I love to live here, as is probably quite evident.
Comment from JSD
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Can I visit please? It sounds amazing. A world away from the drab, behoused, English Midlands. Even that sounds dull. In the middle. Nothing special. Perhaps I should write about it! This is a wonderful piece. Full of weather and landscape and glory. Sorry about the cherries though. Sad face. Thanks for sharing this and good luck in the competition.

 Comment Written 01-Sep-2023


reply by the author on 01-Sep-2023
    You and your family, will always be welcome. It is truly beautiful here. Thank you so much.
Comment from Amanda Henriksen
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 Comment Written 01-Sep-2023


reply by the author on 01-Sep-2023
    What is this? I don't understand.
Comment from Liz O'Neill
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Good alliterative choice which go well to enhance th sensory experience with the onomatopoetic letters, p's, which create a bit of an explosion as we pronounce them. We can hear the thunder.

 Comment Written 01-Sep-2023


reply by the author on 01-Sep-2023
    Thank you so much, Liz. I so appreciate it.
Comment from Liz O'Neill
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Good alliterative choice which go well to enhance th sensory experience with the onomatopoetic letters, p's, which create a bit of an explosion as we pronounce them. We can hear the thunder.

 Comment Written 01-Sep-2023


reply by the author on 01-Sep-2023
    Thank you so much, Liz. I so appreciate it.
reply by Liz O'Neill on 01-Sep-2023
    ***smile***
Comment from Dawn Munro
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"...incomer, though,." << check your punctuation here. Also, I'm not sure about the use of "incomer" -- perhaps "newcomer" would be more suitable, even though you have been there two decades.

"...as much as they flavour my life ..." << here I would spell out who "they" are again because it's a new paragraph.

"There's not been a cherry to be had for the last six years. It's not only very sad, but also a great loss to the whole valley." Oh, NO! How sad!

Ulla, I love reading about your life, and this little snippet was simply marvelous! I have one more suggestion, and only because it needs to be a full sentence, and beginning with "And then" is not. It implies that there is something that came before it, yes? Start with, "The change in the weather, we'd all been looking for, arrived." and eliminate the commas.

Nicely done, my friend!

 Comment Written 31-Aug-2023


reply by the author on 01-Sep-2023
    Thank you so much. I realise you know who I am, but I'm not allowed to reveal it, Lol. I have made the edits. Thanks so much for your help and a lovely review.
Comment from Debbie D'Arcy
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What a fine and well-told story about your home town! I love the way it all started and the atmosphere you created to get the reader into the heart of those mountains and understand the volatility of the weather. From there you gave an evocative description of village life with selective and concise details. There is one small edit: para starting We're a great mix of age groups... "I'm obviously one (of) those.." But this is a great and very readable tribute! Well done and good luck! Debbie

 Comment Written 31-Aug-2023


reply by the author on 31-Aug-2023
    Thank yo so so much, Debbie, and I'm pleased that I've managed to convey what is close to my heart. I have made the edit. Thanks for pointing it out. Thanks so much for your best wishes.
Comment from LJbutterfly
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This is an interesting story and description of the effect of climate change on the festivals and cherry growth in your three Mediterranean villages. Your love of the village is obvious since you've been there twenty years. You've provided a great tribute to your home town. Best wishes in the contest.

 Comment Written 31-Aug-2023


reply by the author on 31-Aug-2023
    Thank you so very much. I so appreciate it. Yes I do love it here and will never move away. I've found my place. Thanks also for your best wishes.
Comment from royowen
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This is a lovely, but yet very sad tale. We don't seem to know what climate change will do to our environment will do into the future do we? Cherries are no longer seasonal where you come from, we seem to be getting a lot more rain here than is traditional, who knows? Beautifully written my friend, blessings Roy
Typo : I'm obviously one (of) those

 Comment Written 31-Aug-2023


reply by the author on 31-Aug-2023
    Thank yo so much, Roy. Yes, it's sad about the cherries. Too much heat and rain at the wrong time. It's all changed. I've made the correction. Thanks for pointing it out
reply by royowen on 31-Aug-2023
    Well done
Comment from Alexandra Trovato
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This is s well written excellent hometown story. It's very descriptive and you explained your adopted hometown and how welcoming it's been to you. It sounds beautiful and balanced with diversity and culture

Best wishes!

Alexandra





Seems like an extra word at the beginning here:

(Far) the majority of the population are native

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 Comment Written 31-Aug-2023


reply by the author on 01-Sep-2023
    Thank you so much Alexandra. You do know that you have muted me? I can't contact you nor read any of your work. I feel rather puzzled, and strange about that. I'm not happy about it. This site didn't use to be so hostile. Ulla
reply by Alexandra Trovato on 01-Sep-2023
    Im not hostile I didn't like my response to you couldn't change it went to fan and buddy you and realized I muted tried to undo it and I couldn't do it

    I've never been on this site before but honestly I have felt hostility and bad feelings from people since I've been here and I am not a person who even thinks badly of others let alone to be hurt by others. I set up the woman's group for instance and asked gypsy to help me. She took it over so I dft rather than fight she has the group I wanted to start and she blocked me now.
    I was ready to leave here many times it's felt like the mean girls movie here, clicks. I wasn't even in clicks in highschool. I'm not like that I was hoping I did something to reverse your block but now I see I have not I don't want blocks I'm sorry I will fix it please know I'm sorry I've had two bad days emotional missing my mom who died 2027: and my older brother who died suddenly in 2018 Grieving hard for some reason again now.

    I will fix this and all I can ask is for you to forgive me I don't know how to do things here I mess up with the settings.

    Love Alex :))
reply by the author on 01-Sep-2023
    I'm so sorry, that you're having a hard time at the moment. I have been on this site for almost ten years. We're here to help each other with our writing. I'm a fiercely independent woman and I don't like clicks. Never been part of any and I'm certainly not starting now. If you want to unmute me you simply go into to mute an unclick my name. Very simple.
    I hope you feel better soon
    Ulla:)))
reply by Alexandra Trovato on 01-Sep-2023
    I am forgetting where that all is those settings but I will now in moments hopefully. Thank you. I know you're good. 😊🙏
reply by Alexandra Trovato on 01-Sep-2023
    It was on my profile bat was trying on yours now it's reversed my buddy. 😊✌️