A Breeze Swept Through
A Quatern126 total reviews
Comment from humpwhistle
Brooke this is a poem with story aspirations. It reads to me like the beginning of an old story. The breeze being the catalyst that prompted the storyteller to begin it again. The oak is a symbol of the steadfast hero. The war you mention is the heart of the hero's story.
I know Brooke, I'm going way beyond what you intended, but this really resonates with the storyteller in me. The last quatrain is so tight, it strikes me as a prelude to a longer opus.
Okay, I get carried away. Go figure.
I love it, Brooke.
Peace, Lee
reply by the author on 23-Aug-2014
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Brooke this is a poem with story aspirations. It reads to me like the beginning of an old story. The breeze being the catalyst that prompted the storyteller to begin it again. The oak is a symbol of the steadfast hero. The war you mention is the heart of the hero's story.
I know Brooke, I'm going way beyond what you intended, but this really resonates with the storyteller in me. The last quatrain is so tight, it strikes me as a prelude to a longer opus.
Okay, I get carried away. Go figure.
I love it, Brooke.
Peace, Lee
Comment Written 23-Aug-2014
reply by the author on 23-Aug-2014
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Lee, thank you so much for your generosity, my friend :-) You can get carried away any time you want, my thoughtful friend :-) Brooke
Comment from gazzagodbod
Oo you seem to have a bit of wind trouble there Brooke ;o) seriously loved your little breezy piece beautifully presented too xxgazzaxx
reply by the author on 23-Aug-2014
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Oo you seem to have a bit of wind trouble there Brooke ;o) seriously loved your little breezy piece beautifully presented too xxgazzaxx
Comment Written 23-Aug-2014
reply by the author on 23-Aug-2014
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Thank you so much, Gazza :-) Brooke
Comment from Sandra Stoner-Mitchell
I enjoy this style of poetry, Brooke, it flows really lovely. But, you have to know how to do them, I think they are quite hard to get the repeating lines to fit in snugly. You make it look so easy, that's what makes it so good. I enjoyed the subject too, the sturdy oak tree is my favourite tree. It stands so proudly. A pleasure as always to read. :) Sandra.
reply by the author on 23-Aug-2014
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I enjoy this style of poetry, Brooke, it flows really lovely. But, you have to know how to do them, I think they are quite hard to get the repeating lines to fit in snugly. You make it look so easy, that's what makes it so good. I enjoyed the subject too, the sturdy oak tree is my favourite tree. It stands so proudly. A pleasure as always to read. :) Sandra.
Comment Written 23-Aug-2014
reply by the author on 23-Aug-2014
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Sandra, thank you so much :-) Brooke
Comment from rama devi
Wonderful work, my friend Musical, eloquent, fluid, well rhymed and finely presented. i especially like the contrasting imagery of leaves whisked with wind and the steady oak.
Great rhyme too:
but while the leaves and reeds were stirred,
the steady oak stood undeterred.
Warmly, rd
reply by the author on 23-Aug-2014
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Wonderful work, my friend Musical, eloquent, fluid, well rhymed and finely presented. i especially like the contrasting imagery of leaves whisked with wind and the steady oak.
Great rhyme too:
but while the leaves and reeds were stirred,
the steady oak stood undeterred.
Warmly, rd
Comment Written 23-Aug-2014
reply by the author on 23-Aug-2014
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thanks so much, rama devi :-) Brooke
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:-))
Comment from barkingdog
HI Brooke. As always your work is perfect. Your lines link seamlessly and take me to the experience.
I hope all is well with you and your family.
:) e
reply by the author on 23-Aug-2014
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HI Brooke. As always your work is perfect. Your lines link seamlessly and take me to the experience.
I hope all is well with you and your family.
:) e
Comment Written 23-Aug-2014
reply by the author on 23-Aug-2014
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Ellen, thank you so very much, my generous friend. It is great to hear from you. I'm counting on reading something new from you soon!! :-) Brooke
Comment from granny goes viral
This poetic vision; a vision of your imagination is yet another winner. I could almost feel the gentle breeze coming from the words and the picture. Good job again.
reply by the author on 23-Aug-2014
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This poetic vision; a vision of your imagination is yet another winner. I could almost feel the gentle breeze coming from the words and the picture. Good job again.
Comment Written 23-Aug-2014
reply by the author on 23-Aug-2014
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Granny, thanks so much for your thoughtful review :-) Brooke
Comment from Patrick G Cox
Hi Brooke,
This reminded me of a bit of doggerel about the wind blowing where it will and going where no one knows. Lovely mental picture in your words though.
Patrick
reply by the author on 23-Aug-2014
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Hi Brooke,
This reminded me of a bit of doggerel about the wind blowing where it will and going where no one knows. Lovely mental picture in your words though.
Patrick
Comment Written 23-Aug-2014
reply by the author on 23-Aug-2014
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good glory - I sure hope this doesn't come across as doggerel as that was very far from my intention LOL
Thanks for your feedback, Patrick :-) Brooke
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Not at all, very far from 'doggerel', your poem was way above that, it was simply the image that came into my head reading it reminded me of a doggerel rhyme we had as kids and which I cannot now remember sufficiently well to repeat!
Patrick
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thank goodness :-)
Comment from RodG
Some excellent imagery in this poem as we WATCH the breeze sweep in.
Easy to visualize the leaves and reeds stirring, but not the sturdy oak
Good use of personification : the breeze as a traveller and the quiet undeterred oak.
I also like the more serious symbolism of resilience during hectic times.
And you effectively weave your refrain through each stanza.
Very nicely done, Brooke.
Rod
reply by the author on 23-Aug-2014
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Some excellent imagery in this poem as we WATCH the breeze sweep in.
Easy to visualize the leaves and reeds stirring, but not the sturdy oak
Good use of personification : the breeze as a traveller and the quiet undeterred oak.
I also like the more serious symbolism of resilience during hectic times.
And you effectively weave your refrain through each stanza.
Very nicely done, Brooke.
Rod
Comment Written 23-Aug-2014
reply by the author on 23-Aug-2014
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Rod, thanks so much :-) Brooke
Comment from Tomes Johnston
This is indeed a stunning picture and the poem that the author has created with this piece of work adds to this beautifully. I never thought of this before, but this breeze could indeed come from anywhere. It is like the butterfly effect. It could have been caused by the slightest thing on the other side of the world. Well done.
reply by the author on 23-Aug-2014
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This is indeed a stunning picture and the poem that the author has created with this piece of work adds to this beautifully. I never thought of this before, but this breeze could indeed come from anywhere. It is like the butterfly effect. It could have been caused by the slightest thing on the other side of the world. Well done.
Comment Written 23-Aug-2014
reply by the author on 23-Aug-2014
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Tomes, thank you so much :-) Brooke
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You are welcome.
Comment from ravenblack
Not all is war designed to win- stand firm and rooted as that oak and the breeze that sirs those leaves to dance and prance really won't sway you at all. I think in the case of the poem, that is a good thing, the breeze being fleeting ideas, gossip or whatever is in vogue. But I can't help but think of which would have the upper hand in a wind with will. Not the oak that could not bend. Excellent poem.
reply by the author on 23-Aug-2014
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Not all is war designed to win- stand firm and rooted as that oak and the breeze that sirs those leaves to dance and prance really won't sway you at all. I think in the case of the poem, that is a good thing, the breeze being fleeting ideas, gossip or whatever is in vogue. But I can't help but think of which would have the upper hand in a wind with will. Not the oak that could not bend. Excellent poem.
Comment Written 23-Aug-2014
reply by the author on 23-Aug-2014
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Thank you for your thoughtful review, Ravenblack :-) Brooke
