Reviews from

The rise of the fire devils.

A short fiction contest entry.

24 total reviews 
Comment from Jannypan (Jan)
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

I enjoyed your contest entry, Mystery Author. You told a good little story in the space allowed. Yes, I believe in love at first sight.

I'm not sure of the sentence that includes 'these ones.' It sound awkward to me. However, it may be ok if this is UK English. If not, I would replace with a more descriptive word or two if your words count holds. Thanks for sharing and best wishes. Respectfully, Jan

 Comment Written 26-Apr-2020


reply by the author on 27-Apr-2020
    Thank you Jan, for your kind review. I've made that change you suggested. ~Mel~
Comment from Jeffrey L. Michaux
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

This is an interesting thing to call them. I know that being twelve years old and starting to have your hormones to start going crazy, perhaps they did think that it was an act of love. Someone rescued them from being severely burned. It does merit gratitude. Thanks for sharing this well thought out and well written work. Well done!

 Comment Written 26-Apr-2020


reply by the author on 27-Apr-2020
    Thank you Jeffrey, for your kind review. ~Mel~
Comment from Gypsy Blue Rose
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

The rise of the fire devils.

Hello my friend

This is the best flash fiction entry in the 100 Word Story writing prompt contest. You have my vote. This story brought memories of puppy love.

 Comment Written 26-Apr-2020


reply by the author on 26-Apr-2020
    Thank you Gypsy Blue Rose, I'm really pleased you like it. I think I have connected with those nearly teens I portrayed.
Comment from ExperiencingLiphe
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

I think as a preteen or teen everyone, at least the girls, have their fair share of these night. The writing our first names with their last names in notebooks just to see how we'd write it or how it'd look. And it could be something as little this as this that sends our mind reeling. Great job with this.

 Comment Written 26-Apr-2020


reply by the author on 26-Apr-2020
    Thank you EL, for your kind review. I think I have connected with the age group I'm portraying. I understand what you mean.
Comment from Sandra Stoner-Mitchell
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

I'm sure every twelve year old girl would feel that was true love. In her mind, he saved her life, he most certainly saved her from being seriously burnt. I thought this was a charming story and an excellent contest entry. Well done, and good luck! :)) Sandra xx

 Comment Written 26-Apr-2020


reply by the author on 26-Apr-2020
    Thank you Sandra, I'm so pleased you like it. Thank you also for the good wishes.
Comment from LisaMay
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Well, I guess it was worth a slight burn to win the attention of the new boy. He'll make good boyfriend material - he's quick in an emergency. I liked this story, it had an authentic feeling through the eyes of a 12 yr old girl.

 Comment Written 26-Apr-2020


reply by the author on 26-Apr-2020
    Thank you Lisa, for your kind review.
Comment from Bill Schott
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

This one-hundred-word story, The Rise of the Fire Devils, finds a young person thrust into danger and rescued by a boy whohas blazed a memory in another's mind.

 Comment Written 25-Apr-2020


reply by the author on 26-Apr-2020
    Thank you Bill, for your kind review.
Comment from BethShelby
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

This is nice flash fiction. It is well written and it a love twist. Something that is all it takes . The Knight in shining armor to the rescue or just the locking of eyes.

 Comment Written 25-Apr-2020


reply by the author on 26-Apr-2020
    Thank you Beth, for your kind review.
Comment from Valerie Fish
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

What a sweet story, you did well to get into the mind of a twelve year old, and got the five words in without being contrived. Good luck with the contest.

 Comment Written 25-Apr-2020


reply by the author on 26-Apr-2020
    Thank you Valerie, for your kind review.
Comment from faith bosire
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Wow my dear,

Such exemplary type of work
I appreciate this piece so much
It was so great and candid. Loved it completely . It would be a great entry for the contest

 Comment Written 25-Apr-2020


reply by the author on 26-Apr-2020
    Thank you Faith, for your kind review.