Reviews from

Act of Endurance

Viewing comments for Chapter 44 "Downward Fall"
Dawn of Chaos

33 total reviews 
Comment from Boogienights
Excellent
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It's sad that you feel so depressed about your work life ending. This is how I interpret this well written poem. There is so, much more you can do after retirement. You can rediscover what you love to do, or volunteer and give to others. Just a thought.

 Comment Written 13-Sep-2023


reply by the author on 14-Sep-2023
    Yeah, I had this dream, until me and Uncle Ham had a fallout, stripping me of my funds, tossing me out for death. O well, one out of two ain't bad. The way the cookie crumbles, finding soon a welcomed joy: I have long for, being with people my age. You are right. Thanking you for those caring words: and generous rate.
Comment from Dolly'sPoems
Excellent
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This sounds like a deep depression brought on by the thought of retirement and a feeling of worthlessness and despair. Most people can't wait to retire, but when work has been the best part of your life and you are forced to give it up then it can feel like a dreadful loss, a poignant write, love Dolly x x x

 Comment Written 13-Sep-2023


reply by the author on 14-Sep-2023
    Never loved work, growing up on a small farm, enduring those tasks, ended that. I was framed and dismissed from a job, I work ed thirty-five years on. Just this noble view, by management. Big time joke to them, trashing people, thought lower than them: lives. Their none fear of God, and authority, made things very clear to me. Liken the killing of an innocent man: Jesus. Thanking for your thoughtful sentiments, and generous rate.
Comment from Frank Malley
Excellent
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"Downward Fall" is a complex poem that intends to suggest the major and largely unhappy experiences of consciousness. It is a difficult poem to read because it is a sequence of images unconnected by some discernible narrative plan; one reads phrase after phrase about a painful, thwarted destiny, and can only maybe average the experiences detailed as unyieldingly dark.
Such a method of interpretation does not establish a linkage beyond two categories things: what is dark and destructive, and what is illuminated and hopeful.
The choices of words used to develop the poem's light and dark presentations is chosen from the realm of common, sensational words. There is not much that is genuinely new and noteworthy in this tower of struggle, failure, and despair. Because I find it difficult to rate, I am giving it a five, which seems perhaps a little generous.

 Comment Written 12-Sep-2023


reply by the author on 14-Sep-2023
    I hear you, respecting those statements, about my cross feelings. Appreciating your generous rate despite those faults on its presentation.
reply by Frank Malley on 14-Sep-2023
    categories of things; I left out a word.
Comment from JSD
Excellent
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An intriguing piece. A lot of words. Some of them very powerful. You certainly can use vocabulary. And your imagery is impressive. However you seem to leave normal English usage behind which means that this doesn't always make sense and so any ideas you want to communicate are lost. To me at any rate. But please ignore my subjective view.

 Comment Written 12-Sep-2023


reply by the author on 14-Sep-2023
    No you're right. I do have my issue with grammar, thanking you for this generous rate despite those faults.
Comment from Alcreator Litt Dear
Excellent
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Life change is inevitable; fate is eternal and is never ruled by a new born; downward fall is evident; well said, well done; thank you for sharing this.

 Comment Written 10-Apr-2020


reply by the author on 11-Apr-2020
    I appreciate your warm thoughts prevailing this particular read, thanking you for your generous rate and welcomed remarks.
Comment from papa55mike
Excellent
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We are free in a descending spiral of time that cannot be stopped. What a wonderfully written poem. Best of luck with your writing!

Have a great day and God bless.
mike

 Comment Written 10-Apr-2020


reply by the author on 11-Apr-2020
    A very encouraging statement, thinking my writes are slightly off target, appreciating your view this one is coherent. Thanking you for generous rate and touching words.
Comment from beizanten
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

A good choice of title. a pretty good opening stanza and very interesting picture. A very good second stanza. A quite powerful third stanza. a very good and intriguing piece of poetry, thank you for sharing.

 Comment Written 10-Apr-2020


reply by the author on 11-Apr-2020
    Glad certain aspects in this write were captivating to your interests, thanking you for your generous rate and welcomed comments.
Comment from Galactia
Average
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Hi

When i read it at first i thought it was a story about you being in a spaceship, decending and now your your mentally and emotionaly going down hill from disphoria. Then i continued reading and feel it is a little confusing to follow.

Keep trying
Regards
Tia

 Comment Written 27-May-2016


reply by the author on 28-May-2016
    Yeah, life has its pits and so do my writes. Thanking you for generous rate and captivating statement.
Comment from Dr. Nad
Excellent
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Downward Fall is a very nice read that challenges normative thinking. You take us down a path of linguistic gymnastics that deposit us at the door of inquisitiveness. What is the end of down? You have asked the question what is this all about? Where does it lead? And what does it matter? You have wondered about purpose and you have wondered about significance. These are all thoughts that deserve a lot of consideration. Thanks for sharing. May God bless you!

 Comment Written 27-May-2016


reply by the author on 28-May-2016
    No it is I who thank, you. Warm touching sentiments: I find compelling with given hopes. Glad.write touched you.
reply by Dr. Nad on 28-May-2016
    You are most welcome.
    Embrace the love from above!
Comment from sweetwoodjax
Excellent
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this is an excellent write, tpac, you did an excellent job writing this poem about the way the journey of life and death and everything in between. I enjoyed reading this one. don't know what else to say

 Comment Written 23-May-2016


reply by the author on 23-May-2016
    Your thoughts are kind about this write: glad it found interests. Thanking you for generous rate and touching thoughts.