Comment from Badger_29

Excellent

Thank you so much for sharing this with me.
This is just as cleverly designed as Zachary, hilarious.
I did find one typo might be intended,
I noticed you spelled it organised, but upon further research, DID discover that this is also an accurate spelling which, according to my dictionary, was British English in origin.
Thanks again for the lead
Blessings,
Brother Badger

 Comment Written 31-Jan-2017

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reply by the author on 01-Feb-2017

Thanks, Badger.

Yes, we kiwis use British spelling in the main. I remember this being fun to write - I suspect many first time Mums are a little like Suzy.

Steve

reply by Badger_29 on 01-Feb-2017

Thanks for replying,
Brother Badger

Comment from dragonpoet

Excellent

This shows a mother too into following everything she hears and reads about parenting. This is a silly poem with a serious topic. Let a child be a child and just help and don't push. It can cause problems later if you do. I like how calmly the grandmother takes the explosion.

Keep writing

Joan

 Comment Written 31-Jan-2017

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reply by the author on 01-Feb-2017

Thanks, Joan. yes, I like the grandmother'd calmness too. It reminds me of...
Pa, who had seen the occurrence
Just didn't know what to do next.
He said, "Mother, yon lion's et Albert"
And Mother said 'Ee, I am vexed."

Steve

reply by dragonpoet on 02-Feb-2017

You're welcome, Steve.

Joan

Comment from marijmd

Exceptional

I so hate so those picture perfect over achievers! ha ha ha - this was a delight to read - great story and set to a nice rhythm.
:) Maria

 Comment Written 07-Oct-2014

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reply by the author on 08-Oct-2014

Maria, thanks a lot for the review and the lovely six stars!

Steve

Comment from MissMerri

Excellent

Hahahahaha... this is the second side-splittingly funny poem I've read in the past hour. You have outdone yourself with this one. It is hilarious because it is too close to the truth... and only slightly exaggerated I fear. We've probably all known parents like this, who plan from conception to have the most brilliant and talented child in the history of the world. Oh, my. This was SO much fun to read! Your lilting rhythm and creative rhymes add to the fun. It was certainly well-written as well as highly amusing.

 Comment Written 07-Oct-2014

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reply by the author on 07-Oct-2014

Thanks, Adonna - nothing like a good laugh. Now if you'll just let me know who wrote that other side-splitting poem, I'll just nobble him before the next contest starts!

Steve

Comment from RGstar

Excellent

I am not one for comedy, yet this raised a smile. Mothers really do have to cater for much.

The vocabulary was spot on. Well executed.
A tad long but did not lose interest.

Best wishes,

RGstar

 Comment Written 07-Oct-2014

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reply by the author on 07-Oct-2014

Thank you for the kind review.

Steve

Comment from angelface2

Excellent

Ah, Kiwisteveh, Your brain was working overtime, too so watch out. I sure enjoyed reading this and getting my belly laugh for today. I loved it. rhythm was so good. :>D Miss Sally

 Comment Written 07-Oct-2014

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reply by the author on 07-Oct-2014

It's OK, I've given my brain a good rest after that - until next time!

Thanks for stopping by.

Steve

reply by angelface2 on 07-Oct-2014

Hahahaha. Miss Sally

Comment from Caressa_08

Excellent

I really don't like how the last two stanzas. Otherwise, it was a good read.. And, really think a more pleasant ending would of been better. And, really don't consider it all that humorous....Babies, young children, are precious & the thought of them to be blown up by whatever, even in an imaginary tale as yours, for me is atrocious.

Caressa

 Comment Written 07-Oct-2014

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reply by the author on 07-Oct-2014

Caressa, thanks for reviewing, especially since it is clearly not your cup of tea.

Steve

Comment from Sasha

Excellent

Hate to admit it but I've known a few mothers that were pretty close to this one. Their heads didn't blow up but the school wasn't happy and some of the neighbors actually put their homes up for sale. Trying to be the perfect mother can be a trying thing for those who have to deal with it every day. Great work with this one. You had me laughing out loud.

 Comment Written 07-Oct-2014

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reply by the author on 07-Oct-2014

Thank you - just a touch of truth in even the silliest story.

Steve

Comment from Genya

Exceptional

This was a brilliant read, so funny, that I really couldn't stop laughing. Oh yes, there are some pushy mums out there but this really beats the lot of them. A brilliant story told in a poem. Excellent rhyme and rhythm from start to finish. Loved the pregnancy, the drawing of the curtains for the birth and of course Fleurs early years where she learns all the languages, dancing, instruments. No wonder her head burst. Which was also brilliantly done by the way. A well deserved six. Loved it. Genya

 Comment Written 07-Oct-2014

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reply by the author on 07-Oct-2014

Genya, thanks so much for the enthusiastic review and the sixer - much appreciated.

So glad you got a good laugh which is really what this is all about.

Steve

Comment from Ekim777

Excellent

We think ourselves kings and queens and overlook the beauty of ourselves. We inflate our humanity with vain ideas about ourselves. The poor kids in their innocence don't stand a chance. The female of the species seem to bear the brunt of it all but they might mature earlier than the menfolk. No matter, everybody's beautiful in their own way. May we keep our sense of humor and not our vanity. King Solomon, in all his wisdom said that all was vanity. The females of the species seem instinctively to know better. Forgive me for encroaching to much on your poem -Ekim777

 Comment Written 07-Oct-2014

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reply by the author on 07-Oct-2014

Well isn't that what we poets want - for the reader to become involved enough to want to express their own thoughts?

Thanks, Mike.

Steve