General Fiction posted December 5, 2019

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A newscast coming our way

The flip

by djeckert

A script from a newscast likely coming to a western town near you. (In this goofy Western world.)

The main character is a gorgeous "newsbabe" sitting at a teleprompter, in a newsroom studio. (Wearing a pink cowboy hat, if you'd like. )


"Howdy, Y'all, and Good evenin'. I'm Snowy Flake. Welcome to tonight's edition of "Flake news".

Tonight, we take an in-depth look at the unprecedented lawsuit, and trial brought forth by a group of disgruntled political prisoners on death row.

These prisoners allege that the prison's Warden, one Mr. Swan P. Slayer, had the unmitigated audacity to obnoxiously and blatantly "Flip the bird " to some of the death row political prison mates who were outside, getting their exercise in the prison yard.

The lawsuit alleges that Mr. Slayer, back in June of this year, performed the outrageous and job- threatening act. Flipping the bird as he walked along the outside of the prison yard, while decidedly, and mockingly performing the vulgar act from the other, "free" side of the barb-wired, prison fence.

The lawsuit goes on to point out how Mr. Slayer did this "impeachable" act, on his way to doing his disgusting prison business, in another part of the prison.

Now, reports are out in the case, as truth would have it, that Mr. Slayer and his lawyers have presented to the court as evidence for his pathetic defense, actual prison camera footage of the incident in the prison yard, that was somehow inexplicably recorded.

The prison footage clearly and plainly captures what SEEMS to only appear as Mr. Slayer giving a friendly wave to the onlooking prisoners. The prisoners who were also plainly seen lovingly and passionately flipping the warden "The bird" themselves, are on record as claiming that this was done by them, out of respect for the prison as an institution. (We know we can't argue with THAT) .

But, although Mr Slayer and his lawyers claim that the video evidence clearly shows that there was no " flip of bird", but, in fact, merely a wave, the lawyers representing the death row political prisoners can clearly show that he did, in fact, "flip the bird".

Here's a quote from the top lawyer... representing himself, along with the other soon- to- be brought to justice death row prisoners. The celebrated former Congressman turned lawyer, Adam Schiff, had this to say:

"Although, it only SEEMS like Mr. Slayer was giving just a friendly wave to the prisoners as he passed, we ALL clearly know... and as my evidence will easily show ... Mr. Slayer only offered presenting his other four fingers in this noxious "wave", as some kind of smokescreen for finger handsign collusion. This, to merely cover up the way in which he clearly DID hatefully "flip the bird", to us...ahmmmm...THOSE... prisoners. WE ALL know how a wave is merely coded language for the hate and disgust that Mr. Slayer, and all prison wardens of his "type" have, for the death row prisoners, and even for the prison itself as an Institution. So , don't let Mr. Slayer fool you with his trickery and his sleight of hand."

You certainly can't argue with that evidence and logic.

Stay tuned for tomorrow's update in the trial.

Thanks for watching Flake news. We'll join you again tomorrow night.

Until then... May the truth be your own... as we wipe that shite off of our boots and climb back on that bull... let your Spurs a - jingle and a-jangle.

Stay tuned for the beautiful loquacious, and obsequious Foxy Morono, who is up next. Good night! ... Y'all ... yeeeeeeee- haaaaw!"

Humorous Short Script contest entry
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