General Script posted March 7, 2019

Chapters:

...64 65 -66- 67...

Excellent

Pons and Ned meet up at a bar in the city.

A chapter in the book Scenes

Scene at a St. Patricks Day Party

by Bill Schott

Pons walks into a local Irish-owned bar. There are four-leaf clover and leprechaun images all about, with green streamers hanging everywhere. He sees a few friends standing around a tall drinking table. He approaches them as one of the three greets him. Doe: Top a the mornin' to ya, Pons boy. Pons: Hi, Waldo. Isn't it a bit late to be morning? Doe: In our case we're arly foe tamarra. Pons: You fellas been partying all day? Doe: Not if it ain't midnight. Another friend leans over to speak. Ray: Hey, Pons. Where's your moron cousin Ned? Pons: I'll let that go, Ramona, since I know you have a thing for Ned. Ray: Take that back, Pons. Meeme: I didn't know you had the hots for Ned, Ray. He is quite a catch. Ray: Shut your hole, Meeme! Doe: Hold up there, ladies. No need to get all hot'n bothered o'er Ned. Pons: I wish Ned was here to see you two fighting over him. Ray: Or to see you get your eye bloused. Doe: You got these girlies all in a bunch now, Pons. That's gonna send this party down a dark road. Through the door comes Ned. On his head is a green derby, his hair is tinted green, he is wearing a tee-shirt with KISS ME, I'M IRISH printed on it. Ned:  Hey, fellars and gellars.  Doe:   Top a the mornin' to ya, Neddy. Ray:  Hey, moron. Meeme: Oh , Ned!  You're Irish! I had better kiss you, honey. Ned: I ain't really an Irisher, Meeme. I jist got these thin's on account of it bein' warsh day. Pon: So why do you have on a green derby, Ned. Ned: My ball cap is in the warsh too. Doe: Why's ya har green? Ned: Guess I had a runny nose. A collective "EEEWWWWW" comes from the crowd. Meeme: Never mind the kiss. Ned: So it's Saint Patty's Day, huh?  They servin' up that green beer here? Pons: Sure, Ned.  Let me get you one. Ned: That's akay, Pons. I quit a drinkin' when my daddy passed. Pons: Uncle Newbie died!? Ned:  Nah!  He passed gas once at a beer pardy an put us all off our feed fer awhile. I ne'er got the thirst fer beer since. Doe: Let's salute the great man by givin' a proper toast. Pons: May you be in heaven for an hour before the devil knows you're dead. Ray:  May you never be a moron -- oops! --too late, Ned. Meeme grabs Ramona by the hair and the two begin swinging at each other until they drop to the floor wrestling. Ned:  May yer butt-kickin' always hurt yer foot, and not yer butt. As the women roll about the floor cussing, the crowd raises their many glasses of green beer and drink.   Write A Review Pays one point and 2 member cents. You need to login or register to write reviews. It's quick! We only ask four questions to new members.