Star of the apes, that's my role
I'll jump from tires or climb up a pole.
When kids come to visit, I swing from the ropes
I'm lonely, but hey a guy's gotta have hopes.

That was then, and this is now
They brought me a dame, and I said WOW!
She's got a little accent, she comes from Tanzania
And I think I've caught a Tanzania mania.

I did some flips and beat my chest
Sucked in my abs and looked my best
"Hey little honey, wanna split a banana?
My name's Greystoke, and I come from Ghana."

She stared into space
Disdain on her face
I snuggled up next to her thinking I might
Give her a kiss, but she gave me a bite.

Three laps around our pen then into my hammock
Discouraged and feeling sick to my stomach.
I'd leave her alone at least for tonight
She'd see things better in the morning light.

Fred, the zookeeper, brought the breakfast spread
She rushed up quickly looking underfed
But I was a jerk and beat my chest
She scurried away, and Fred did protest.

"Greystoke, behave yourself," he cried
And up to my platform, I went to hide.
She finished some breakfast and started to weep
I sat there feeling like a world-class creep.

Later that day I tried again.
Used my best act, the comedian.
Wiggled my ears and saw her smile
Stuck out my tongue and used all my guile.

Friends, at last, she told me her name.
"Mrembo," she said, and my heart went aflame.
We picked nits for awhile, 'til she went to sleep
And I climbed back up to my treetop keep.

I spit at some zebras from my aerial perch
When I looked back again, my heart gave a lurch.
The sweet girl was missing and whereupon
I searched everywhere, but she was gone.

Immediately, I went into a sulk
Threw some tires and started to skulk.
Fred brought dinner, but I refused to eat
I trudged to a corner and took a seat.

I waited all night hoping she'd come
But she didn't, and I was tired and numb.
Dr. George came to visit and asked, "What's amiss?
I threw a banana and gave him a hiss.

"Don't worry fella, your girlfriend's okay,
We'll bring her back here later today.
She just has a cold, new germs, you see."
And from there I swung from the ropes with glee.

She came back to me a little bit muddled,
So I sat with her, and we both cuddled.
I whispered sweet nothings in both of her ears
And hoped we'd be happy for years and years.