| Biographical Non-Fiction posted April 24, 2017 | Chapters: |
...7 8 -9- 10... 
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How The Lord answered my prayers
A chapter in the book Lamentations of a Lost Laddy
The Lord Is Good, All the Time!
by Badger_29
Conflict of Ch. 7 was resolved.
| Background Chapter 1-2 are from my childhood, 3-7 deal with life in Sacramento, Ch. 8 is a personal testimony, and this Ch. Talks about how the conflict of Ch. 7 is resolved. |
I am writing to let my readers know that God is good, he answers prayers, and sometimes you just have to be patient.
In chapter seven, I talked about problems that I was having with bullies where I live at North Side Recovery.
Specifically, (names have been changed for courtesy and discretion),
Dave and Ken moved in.
Now, Dave is a tall, goofy kid who laughs a lot (loudly), is up-beat and bubbly. He, like me, is a type A outgoing and intense personality, and enjoys being the "class clown", having the spotlight.
Ken is a schizophrenic (not the only one there) who had a hard life growing up as an orphan in group homes, etc., including abuse of all kinds. He is a brilliant poet, so we connected right off the bat.
Then Dave got jealous, angry, and for some reason, my presence became threatening to him . . .
(please refer to chapter 7 for more details), and got very hateful to me.
One night Dave and Ken came out and proceeded to "tag team me", one making me angry and the other telling me that I was being direspectful by raising my voice.
This brought up an ocean of emotion from my sub-conscious memories of being small and bullied in school. I was terrified!
Dave was complaining that I was watching TV too late, and proceeded to turn the TV off.
I had finally had enough, and I went back and knocked on the night man's door. He did not answer.
Next, I called Bill G., who also was unavailable.
Out of options, and literally locked in my room with them jiggling the door knob, and taunting the way bullies do, I called the police.
The dispatcher said she would send someone, but called later (~!~) to say that they had been too busy.
Finally Cappy, the night man got up, and I told him what was happening.
Hopefully I am conveying the level of hostility in my environment, and how it was having a continuing and horrible effect on me.
The next morning, Bill G., the main house manager, got very angry with the situation, and told Ken that he had to pack and leave.
He said, "I can not have other tenants locked in their room, calling the Police"
But, things being the way they are, after the steam blew off, Ken stayed.
I am glad that he did.
It was getting to the point that I was ready to go back to the hosital, or the streets, or anywhere else.
I was entering a state of deep and insidious depression, and was suffering from anxiety, a feeling of hopelessness, and my mind kept obsessing on these things, trying to find a solution.
Now, I have gotten reviews telling me that I "over" wrote this, but I am merely attempting, as desperately as the situation was, to find the appropriate verbage to accurately describe the complex and mixed up emotions that I was experiencing!
I believe I have done an acceptable job at this.
Thanks for being patient, and reading on!
I am going to utilize scripture from the King James Version of the Holy Bible to help explain:
This is from the Old testament book of Proverbs, chapter three-
1 My son, forget not my law; but let thine heart keep my commandments:
2 For length of days, and long life, and peace, shall they add to thee.
3 Let not mercy and truth forsake thee: bind them about thy neck; write them upon the table of thine heart:
4 So shalt thou find favour and good understanding in the sight of God and man.
~and this is the part that is most relevent~
5 Trust in the LORD with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding.
6 In all thy ways acknowledge him, and he shall direct thy paths.
If I just trusted Him to go before me, it would have saved a lot of needless worry. You see, I have been trying to do things "my way" for a long time, and old habits die hard. I prayed that Dave would leave; yet another subtle but obvious error on my part.
It says that we are to acknowledge Him
"In all our ways",and He will direct our paths.
As someone who has experienced His Holy Spirit, AND human behaviour, I have come to the realization that, while in "the flesh", we are incapaple of "acknowledging Him" Twenty-four hours a day, seven days a week.
(I know that I could have said, "24-7", but as a professional writer, I like to be specific, as some readers might not be familiar with that idiom).
So, we acknowledge Him when we can, and learn through trial, error, and:
~"Prayers answered"~,
to acknowledge Him more and more often, and with greater zeal and joy, because:
He is So Good to me, all of the time.
Well, Dave came up to me and apologized last night. He patted me on the shoulder, shook my hand, and sincerely apologized for his behaviour.
To balance the equation, and because it was the right thing to do, I followed suit, and we walked away having shaken on a mutual peace treaty.
And, one reason that he did this, as I discovered later, is because my room-mate, Curtis, told him that I was getting depressed and miserable.
He told him that I was fun to be around when I was at my best, and not in a hostile, unfriendly environment.
I am thankful, humbled, and my faith is not only sustained, but strengthened.
I am much more at ease, and have returned to my feelings of being at peace with God, my chaotic environment, my housemates, and myself.
Darren~ Monday, April 24, 2017
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Thank-you, Lord~
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