Jill felt her husband inch closer and closer. She opened her eyes, and focused on the green glowing lights on her nightstand. It was 2:14am and he was still awake. Even before he closed the final gap between them she knew what she would feel, and when it touched the warm silk covering her rear, she shuddered.

Damn, she thought. She hadn’t meant to move, but it just happened. She closed her eyes and froze. Before she could think further, her instincts again took over, and she let out a loud snore. Just go to sleep, David. Please, just roll over and go to sleep.

She felt him rise on his elbow, and even with her back turned, she felt his eyes bore into her. She was just about to turn over when he slid back to his side. Jill began to relax when the bed shook and David got out.  

Her eyes opened in time to see him grab his IPad, and walk into the bathroom. It didn’t take long for her to make out the raunchy 70’s music, and fake trampy moans of pleasure. She sat up in the bed, and stared at the bright strip of light running along the bottom of the door.  Soon she heard David’s heavy breathing, and muffled grunts. After twenty years of marriage, she didn’t need a stopwatch to know it wouldn’t take long. She thought back to her talk with her best friend Pam that afternoon.
***

“I don’t know what’s wrong. I feel tired all the time. One minute I’m hot, the next I’m cold. I look at David and I feel. I don’t know... I feel…”

“What, girl? Are you angry? Is he not carrying his weight? I hear he’s got a new secretary. Susan told me, she’s kind of chubby, but pretty. You don’t think he’s…”

“No, no, Pam. It’s nothing like that. I know David loves me, and I love him.”

“Girlfriend, take it from someone who’s been divorced twice, and is currently screwing a nine inch piece of plastic. Love is not enough. When you let yourself believe it is, that’s when you’re having a threesome, but don’t know it.”

 “David would never cheat. It’s not in his nature. He is a man of his word, and would die before he broke it.”

“Then what’s wrong? You look like someone has died, and David looks like he’s addicted to Viagra. I mean, damn, girl. He has a boner every time I see him. Aren’t you two…”

“No, I just don’t feel like it. I want to take care of him, but whenever I think about doing it. I get sick to my stomach. God, I wish things could go back to the way they used to be.”

“I think you two need to see someone, and from one woman to another; you had better do it soon. David is a good man, but he’s no superman.”
***

Suddenly there was a final manly grunt, and then the music stopped. When the toilet flushed, she lay back down, and wrapped herself in her now cold blanket.  The bathroom light went out, and the door opened. She closed her eyes, and listened to her husband crawl back into bed. Her mind instantly went back to the first night they slept together. It was so sweet, so wonderful, like a dream come true. As David pulled, his own blanket over him, Jill felt hot tears run down the side of her face. It’s not supposed to be like this.
*******

David couldn’t sleep. His mind kept going back to his secretary, Sheila. At first he thought she was just a really nice, talkative woman. She was his age, divorced, and had already raised a son. Her body wasn’t better than Jill’s, she carried a few extra pounds, but the way she moved, smiled, and her dresses flowed around her, spoke of extreme confidence. She flirted openly with him, as if they had known each other for years. There wasn’t a single topic that was taboo or uncomfortable to her.

That afternoon, they ate lunch in his office. Sheila was going on and on about how difficult it was to find a man who was smart, sexy, and who could just enjoy sex without becoming overly attached.
****

“Am I wrong, David, or have men become afraid of just having a good time with a woman? I just want a man who acts like a man. If it feels good to you, go deep, pound it, pull my hair, just let go and treat me like a sexual object. You know what I mean?”

“You mean, live for the moment, and don’t worry about being PC,” David answered a little nervous.

“Yes, and relish the pure ecstasy of being inside me.  Hell, I’m enjoying it. I just don’t want to be the only one. I hate feeling like I’m having sex alone.”

He was hard for the rest of the day, and by the way Sheila smiled at him when she left, he guessed that she knew it too. When he got home he had tried to flirt with Jill. He brushed against her, tried to kiss and hold her, but she only moved away. At dinner he attempted to steer the conversation to sex, but she started arguing about the phone bill, or was it the light bill. He couldn’t remember. He did remember the bathroom door was locked when she took a shower, so he cleaned up in the guest bathroom.
****

In the darkness of their bedroom he listened to Jill’s breathing. She was awake, but pretending to be asleep. Why does she do that? After twenty years doesn’t she realize I know her? Maybe she’s waiting for me to make a move. Sheila likes bold men, maybe all women do? Maybe Jill wants to be taken, not asked?

David slowly slid across the cold space between them. In his mind it was like crossing a no-fly zone. He expected her to shoot him down, but she didn’t move. David held his breath, and strained his ears for any sound of acceptance. He was within an inch of her. He took a deep breath, and the sweet fragrance of her body filled his lungs. His penis twitched in anticipation. It had been months since he was last in his wife, and though he finished that time, it was far from pleasurable.

But a hard penis has no memory, and the failures of the past are soon forgotten in the lust of the present.  He pushed forward, and his swollen head slid against the thin silk protecting her entrance. He poked once, twice, and then a third time, leaving a wet spot where his desire leaked out. She didn’t move. Just do it. She didn’t say stop. Just do it. She wants it. Just do it.

David gave in to the voice in his head, and slowly reached for the waistband of her panties. A loud throaty snore froze him. She pulled her blanket tighter around her, adding a second barrier between her and his penis.  David was up in an instant. Propped on his elbow he glared at Jill in the darkness. He knew she wasn’t asleep, and what was lust a second ago, had quickly turned to rage. No, not now, David. Just get through the night. Clear your head, and deal with her tomorrow.

He, rolled out of bed, grabbed his IPad, and stomped into the bathroom. He went straight to his favorite site; Asian MILF’s, and let his hand, imagination, and a generous amount of lotion ease, at least part of, his physical pain.

Somewhat satisfied, he flopped down on his side of the bed, and rested his aching head onto his cold pillow. His mind went back to the first night he and Jill spent together. It was glorious, fun and everything he had ever wanted. He didn’t know what happened to that girl, and he didn't like what became of that happy young man. One lonely tear soaked into his pillow.

David covered his shame with his blanket, and tried desperately not to dream about the good old days.