A Dark Christmas Tale

The turkey’s carved and so are you

You’ll never again make holidays blue

Instead of eating my pumpkin pie

On Christmas this year you will die

While we enjoy green bean casserole

Satan will come and take your soul

Oh, the fight about the Christmas tree

The winner of that will of course be me

We will have a marvelous feast

Quiet will reign as you are deceased

While we like our potatoes mashed

None for you, your head is bashed

The Christmas music you hated to play

Well, you won’t have to hear it today

Snowdrifts outside are getting deep

No more whining you little creep

I’ve arranged for Santa and sleigh

To return and carry your body away

On this Christmas Day I will gain

The end of you driving me insane