General Fiction posted September 16, 2021

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Dwell Well in the Lifestyle You Deserve!

Looking to Move?

by Mama Baer

A House for Rent Contest Winner 

Apartment for Rent
7 Celestial Lane, Angel Hollow, SC

Sublime apartment for rent. Beautiful new construction situated in a Historic District designed with you in mind! Leave your cares behind and revel in spacious living areas with a mansion-like feel. Fully furnished with fine cabinetry designed by a Master Craftsman. Float across divine white carpeting throughout, where indoor temperatures hold at a pleasant 72 degrees. Shiny marble staircases lead to fingerprint-resistant windows with expansive views of immaculate landscapes Created by our Master Gardener. Lose track of time and stroll Paths in endless bliss through a cherubic paradise. Scrumptious meals delivered free of charge three times a day (wings a daily special). Complimentary laundry service (angelic launderers specialize in brightening your whites). Owner lives onsite, is attentive to your every need, and provides expert mending services. It doesn't get better than this! Qualifying individuals live rent-free. You earned it!

Apartment for Rent 
13 Double Toothpick Road, Pitchfork, WY

Dingy apartment, six floors underground, with no windows, no air conditioning nor refrigeration. Five-foot ceilings throughout. Tattered red shag carpet (not hol-ey, though) and black peeling paint. One 40-watt bulb dangles in the tiny front entry; no other electricity available. No need for furnishings. They won't fit! No indoor plumbing nor garbage collection. All residents must remain indoors. Safety is not guaranteed. No visitors allowed. No amenities. No services within 10,000 miles. Devilishly hot year-round. Lottery draw once a year for use of the dilapidated clubhouse, which serves warm milk, dry bread, and the "Old Scratch"-ed stereo in the corner plays but one vinyl single on repeat: “Regrets” by the Heartaches. 


Writing Prompt
Make two ads for an apartment for rent. Write one for Heaven and one for hell. Describe your apartment and give an address. Be creative. Recommended: No mention of Heaven or hell in the ads. Maximum word count is 300 words.

A House for Rent
Contest Winner

Prime real estate. Are you prepared?
Pays one point and 2 member cents.

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