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rhymelord

Tender Tears by kiwisteveh

Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Dear Steve,
I am not really into these less well known forms, but you do it very well. Ticks all the boxes for rhyme and metre and good development of your theme. Good Luck.
Reg
Comment Written by rhymelord on 29-Sep-2014

Uncle by ravenblack

Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Dear Raven,
There is no doubting the passion with which you speak your long hidden thoughts, even though the detail of what you say is not easily comprehensible to the reader. I hope that it is cathartic to you.
Reg
Comment Written by rhymelord on 28-Sep-2014

The last soldier by Eric1

Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Dear Eric,
A wonderfully written epic and a true and distressing eulogy to the millions who have died. Good tempo and rhyme.
Regards
Reg
Comment Written by rhymelord on 28-Sep-2014

Moreen by l.raven

Excellent
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Dear Raven,
I shall not light a candle, but I shall certainly say a prayer for the recovery of Maureen. Well Done.
Regards
Reg
Comment Written by rhymelord on 28-Sep-2014

Adam, where are you? part 2 by royowen

Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

Dear Roy,
I am not a great fan of such in depth religious writing, nor am I a committed believer and hence cannot accept/agree with what you say. However, your skill in presenting your theme, with its excellent rhyme and metre and its clear message, demands the award of six stars.
Think Voltaire.
Regards
Reg
Comment Written by rhymelord on 28-Sep-2014

5-7-5 (Jesus Christ) by Domino 2

Excellent
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Dear Ray,
Beautifully expressed. I also go right along with your notes, as you can do doubt deduce from some of my writing. Particularly "a good atheist beats a bad Christian any day. "
I'll note that for the basis of a poem.
Regards
Reg
Comment Written by rhymelord on 27-Sep-2014

Leap by adewpearl

Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Dear Brooke,
Perfect epigram, but as I reached the last line I could not help but substitute in my mind, the words "Lie down and have a sleep"
In retrospect, that is also good advice to prepare one for the energetic task ahead.
Regards
Reg
Comment Written by rhymelord on 27-Sep-2014

Ode to Alexandra, my granddaughter. by Nosha17

Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Dear Faye,
A thoroughly charming piece that only a Nana could write. I love it, but I do have a minor suggestion. The line:
"They sparkle like the dew. "
is the only line in trimester in the poem. Nothing wrong with trimeter, provided that it is counted to be used in each second line. As it is I did find I stumbled on line 4 stanza 1, because I was expecting another trimeter line. May I suggest this line is amended as follows:
"They sparkle like the morning dew. "
or such like.

Hope this helps,
Regards
Reg
Comment Written by rhymelord on 27-Sep-2014

Benjamin Franklin by bard owl

Excellent
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Dear Linda,
A man most capable of inspiring others and a genius to boot. My only regret is that he was not on OUR side in that disturbing little fracas in the 1770's. LOL
Best regards
Reg
Comment Written by rhymelord on 27-Sep-2014

Bird Love by Ideasaregems-Dawn

Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Dear Dawn,
Another win for perfect rhyme and metre and for really dark thoughts. I was thinking, as I read, that this was a poem of revenge, rather than suicide. Quite a shock ending.
Regards
Reg
Comment Written by rhymelord on 27-Sep-2014


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