Judas Tree
ABC Poem12 total reviews
Comment from Adri7enne
Pretty dire predictions for our future, Steve. I don't like the images you paint, but I can't fault your poetic talent. "fruit of the Judas Tree." Time for us to quit growing disasters.
reply by the author on 17-Sep-2020
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Pretty dire predictions for our future, Steve. I don't like the images you paint, but I can't fault your poetic talent. "fruit of the Judas Tree." Time for us to quit growing disasters.
Comment Written 15-Sep-2020
reply by the author on 17-Sep-2020
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Thank you! I appreciate the extra star - shame the committee didn't like it.
Yes, it's a little grim, but these are grim times in many ways. Maybe I'll write a nice cheerful one next time!
Steve
Comment from barbara.wilkey
I find the artwork you chose for this contest entry almost omniscient. I am wondering about the symbolism in this poem. It's a great contest entry and I wish you the best of luck.
reply by the author on 12-Sep-2020
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I find the artwork you chose for this contest entry almost omniscient. I am wondering about the symbolism in this poem. It's a great contest entry and I wish you the best of luck.
Comment Written 12-Sep-2020
reply by the author on 12-Sep-2020
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Thanks, Barbara.
For me, the words themselves are always more important than the artwork. However, after the poem was written, I did stumble across this image which I thought might serve a double purpose. It is slightly tree-shaped, echoing the Judas tree in the last line, but more importantly it is a nuclear explosion's signature mushroom cloud which backs up the idea of human extinction from line 2 'No human eyes will see.'
Rather grimly, the Judas tree is named after the tree in which Judas hanged himself after betraying Jesus - sometimes called a redbud tree. The reference to Judas symbolises betrayal. I think the main theme is that we, the human race, have betrayed ourselves and our planet, which may well cause our own extinction. Just take a look at what's happening on the west coast of your country right now for a hint of what's to come.
Steve
Comment from Dolly'sPoems
I hope you are not right here, but I do feel human folly will result in destruction in the end, the world is full of mad angry men, a poignant write Steve, love Dolly x
reply by the author on 11-Sep-2020
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I hope you are not right here, but I do feel human folly will result in destruction in the end, the world is full of mad angry men, a poignant write Steve, love Dolly x
Comment Written 11-Sep-2020
reply by the author on 11-Sep-2020
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Many, thanks, Dolly. I'm not about to prance around with a banner declaring. "THE END IS NIGH," but it's easy to be despondent about where the human race is headed these days.
Steve
Comment from CrystieCookie999
This is unusual imagery incorporated in to this ABC poem in five lines. The terrible power in the image is still tree-like in form, or at least at first. interesting post.
reply by the author on 11-Sep-2020
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This is unusual imagery incorporated in to this ABC poem in five lines. The terrible power in the image is still tree-like in form, or at least at first. interesting post.
Comment Written 11-Sep-2020
reply by the author on 11-Sep-2020
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Thank you. I did choose that particular image because of the tree shape, although perhaps, more importantly, it shows the terrible power to obliterate life on earth.
Steve
Comment from juliaSjames
This is a six all the way, Steve. You knocked it out of the ball park.
Powerful imagery, excellent meter and rhyme combine to stun the reader with your grim message.
Like a modern day prophet you point out the result of unchecked human folly in uncompromising terms.
I can only pray that we will come to our senses before it's too late.
Don't know how the contest committee will judge but this is a winner in my opinion.
Good luck
Stay safe
Blessings Julia
reply by the author on 11-Sep-2020
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This is a six all the way, Steve. You knocked it out of the ball park.
Powerful imagery, excellent meter and rhyme combine to stun the reader with your grim message.
Like a modern day prophet you point out the result of unchecked human folly in uncompromising terms.
I can only pray that we will come to our senses before it's too late.
Don't know how the contest committee will judge but this is a winner in my opinion.
Good luck
Stay safe
Blessings Julia
Comment Written 10-Sep-2020
reply by the author on 11-Sep-2020
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Thanks, Julia. I can always rely on you to drill down to the heart of the matter. I am afraid this defeated some reviewers, but you have nailed it.
You and your family stay safe, too.
Steve
Comment from w.j.debi
How eerie! This is quite the commentary on what we are doing or could do to ourselves. Excellent word choices and verbal imagery to pack a punch to your message.
For some reason, it reminds me of a poem by Sara Teasdale, "There Will Come Soft Rains" which talks about mankind's destruction.
reply by the author on 11-Sep-2020
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How eerie! This is quite the commentary on what we are doing or could do to ourselves. Excellent word choices and verbal imagery to pack a punch to your message.
For some reason, it reminds me of a poem by Sara Teasdale, "There Will Come Soft Rains" which talks about mankind's destruction.
Comment Written 10-Sep-2020
reply by the author on 11-Sep-2020
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Thank you!
What is really eerie is your mention of the Teasdale poem. I actually paused part-way through writing this to check out that very piece. Along with the Bradbury story of the same name (which quotes the poem in the text), it relates strongly to both the folly of our way of life and the unconcern of the rest of nature if mankind should be obliterated.
Let's keep our fingers crossed!
Steve
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That is eerie. I have always liked the Teasdale poem. I'll have to check out Bradbury's story. I've read most of his works' but I don't remember that particular story.
Yes, let's keep our fingers crossed.
Comment from Alcreator Litt Dear
This ABC poem speaks about the war mongers and nuclear power bomb users out of jealousy like the fruits of the Judas Tree; man suffers at the follies; well said, well done; thanks for sharing this. ALCREATOR
reply by the author on 11-Sep-2020
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This ABC poem speaks about the war mongers and nuclear power bomb users out of jealousy like the fruits of the Judas Tree; man suffers at the follies; well said, well done; thanks for sharing this. ALCREATOR
Comment Written 10-Sep-2020
reply by the author on 11-Sep-2020
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Thank you for the kind words.
Steve
Comment from lightink
Wow! Steve, that's some powerful writing!
You sent me down the Google rabbit hole researching the Judah tree - but the expression works as a perfect symbol without the actual knowledge, too.
The Apocaliptic mood is tangible from the beginning of the poem.
"Moon will slouch through gauzy clouds'
"gauzy" is such a perfect, deliberate word choice that goes perfectly with the theme of wounded world.
Then, you point towards human extinction:
"no human eye will see;"
But also, the first two limes as a symbol together - the loss of appreciation for the mystical beauty...
Again 'dress' is an awesome echo for 'gauzy', in the post-human imagery:
"our dress will be these ashy shrouds,'
And then, the reference to the human responsibility:
'persistent folly's fee -'
And taking it a step further, the parallel with the ultimate betrayal, and a possible reference to a nuclear cloud (which I probably wouldn't pick up on without the image coming with the poem - my mind goes towards climate disasters and wild fires just based on the poem)
'fruit of the Judas Tree.'
Powerful, thunderously worded poem!
Thank you for sharing!
reply by the author on 11-Sep-2020
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Wow! Steve, that's some powerful writing!
You sent me down the Google rabbit hole researching the Judah tree - but the expression works as a perfect symbol without the actual knowledge, too.
The Apocaliptic mood is tangible from the beginning of the poem.
"Moon will slouch through gauzy clouds'
"gauzy" is such a perfect, deliberate word choice that goes perfectly with the theme of wounded world.
Then, you point towards human extinction:
"no human eye will see;"
But also, the first two limes as a symbol together - the loss of appreciation for the mystical beauty...
Again 'dress' is an awesome echo for 'gauzy', in the post-human imagery:
"our dress will be these ashy shrouds,'
And then, the reference to the human responsibility:
'persistent folly's fee -'
And taking it a step further, the parallel with the ultimate betrayal, and a possible reference to a nuclear cloud (which I probably wouldn't pick up on without the image coming with the poem - my mind goes towards climate disasters and wild fires just based on the poem)
'fruit of the Judas Tree.'
Powerful, thunderously worded poem!
Thank you for sharing!
Comment Written 10-Sep-2020
reply by the author on 11-Sep-2020
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Thank you! Like you, I had to research both the tree and the biblical reference, having dragged the term itself out of some remote crevice in my brain - but yes, I think the name acts as a symbol for betrayal which is what I wanted here.
The image did strike me for its tree shape, although the line was already written before I stumbled on this as the perfect artwork to accompany it. Of course man may very well find other ways to obliterate himself - fires and storms and political unrest may lead the betting, but I am old enough to remember the days of the Cold War with its constant 'On the Beach' threat.
What a great review!
Steve
Comment from Sandra du Plessis
A very well-written ABC poem about the Judas tree and how it appears to look in the moonlight when human eyes will not see the fruit of the Judas tree.
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reply by the author on 11-Sep-2020
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A very well-written ABC poem about the Judas tree and how it appears to look in the moonlight when human eyes will not see the fruit of the Judas tree.
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The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 10-Sep-2020
reply by the author on 11-Sep-2020
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Thanks, Sandra!
Steve
Comment from rama devi
Potent post! I applaud this phrase in particular:
persistent folly's fee
Our collective misdeeds spanning centuries are certainly taking a toll...manifesting at an accelerating pace.
Great phonics in this, especially the internal slant rhyme in this line:
Moon will slouch through gauzy clouds
Fine form. A very good entry. Eloquent and intense!
Warmly,
rd
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The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
reply by the author on 11-Sep-2020
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Potent post! I applaud this phrase in particular:
persistent folly's fee
Our collective misdeeds spanning centuries are certainly taking a toll...manifesting at an accelerating pace.
Great phonics in this, especially the internal slant rhyme in this line:
Moon will slouch through gauzy clouds
Fine form. A very good entry. Eloquent and intense!
Warmly,
rd
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 10-Sep-2020
reply by the author on 11-Sep-2020
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Thank you, Rama. I have had some excellent reviews for this. One reviewer even mentioned the Sarah Teasdale poem, 'There Will Come Soft Rains", which had been on my mind as I was writing.
One good thing about growing old is that I might have died before we really wreck the planet!
Steve
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So true! I agree...how old are you, if I might ask?
