A Compilation of Short stories
Viewing comments for Chapter 51 "Revelations"Expressions
30 total reviews
Comment from justjo66
A lovely short story with intrigue to follow that would definitely make me want to read on and find out what exactly happened. Good job.
reply by the author on 12-Apr-2019
A lovely short story with intrigue to follow that would definitely make me want to read on and find out what exactly happened. Good job.
Comment Written 10-Apr-2019
reply by the author on 12-Apr-2019
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Wow,thank you so much. I so appreciate it and the lovely extra star. All the best. Ulla:)))
Comment from Jannypan (Jan)
This was intense, Ulla. I never expected that ending. However, it makes sense--a crime of passion. Good job with your contest entry and best wishes. Jan
reply by the author on 12-Apr-2019
This was intense, Ulla. I never expected that ending. However, it makes sense--a crime of passion. Good job with your contest entry and best wishes. Jan
Comment Written 09-Apr-2019
reply by the author on 12-Apr-2019
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Thank you so much, Jan. I really appreciate it. All best. Ulla:)))
Comment from Shirley McLain
This was certainly intense. Full of expectations to start ending in tragedy. Did not see one thing to recommend to you to change. Have a great night. Shirley
reply by the author on 12-Apr-2019
This was certainly intense. Full of expectations to start ending in tragedy. Did not see one thing to recommend to you to change. Have a great night. Shirley
Comment Written 09-Apr-2019
reply by the author on 12-Apr-2019
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Thank you so much, Shirley. I really appreciate it.All best. Ulla:)))
Comment from LG Wolfe
Hi Ulla,
This is a fascinating flash fiction piece, and not a scenario I've seen before. The ending is a huge shock which means you've succeeded in your flash. It also makes me want to know so much more. I hope you turn this into a short story and post it someday.
LG
reply by the author on 12-Apr-2019
Hi Ulla,
This is a fascinating flash fiction piece, and not a scenario I've seen before. The ending is a huge shock which means you've succeeded in your flash. It also makes me want to know so much more. I hope you turn this into a short story and post it someday.
LG
Comment Written 09-Apr-2019
reply by the author on 12-Apr-2019
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Thank you so much, LG. I so appreciate it. All the best, Ulla:))
Comment from Gloria ....
This is great, Ulla. My first thought of course was he'd undergone a transformation which is of course the whole essence of short flash. There is a lot of mystery to what has actually transpired and particularly given the bloody knife.
Excellent write and I wish you much luck with the Contest Committee. :)
Gloria
reply by the author on 12-Apr-2019
This is great, Ulla. My first thought of course was he'd undergone a transformation which is of course the whole essence of short flash. There is a lot of mystery to what has actually transpired and particularly given the bloody knife.
Excellent write and I wish you much luck with the Contest Committee. :)
Gloria
Comment Written 09-Apr-2019
reply by the author on 12-Apr-2019
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Ah, Gloria,thank you so much. Your comments made me laugh. Yeah, that could be another interpretation. Hehe. All best. Ulla:)))
Comment from Coco Jane
A good story. Packs a punch.
Consider making the ending more cryptic. The bloodied knife tells plenty. Maybe let the wife say, "Nothing he didn't deserve" or "He did it to himself, darlin'."
You can economize words thus: My heart leapt when I heard the car.
Then you have "room" for another sentence clarifying that this woman is not just an acquaintance--Larry kissed her hand as she stepped out of the car, or something like that.
reply by the author on 12-Apr-2019
A good story. Packs a punch.
Consider making the ending more cryptic. The bloodied knife tells plenty. Maybe let the wife say, "Nothing he didn't deserve" or "He did it to himself, darlin'."
You can economize words thus: My heart leapt when I heard the car.
Then you have "room" for another sentence clarifying that this woman is not just an acquaintance--Larry kissed her hand as she stepped out of the car, or something like that.
Comment Written 09-Apr-2019
reply by the author on 12-Apr-2019
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Thanks a lot for the review. I really appreciate. I like you suggestion. All best. Ulla:)))
Comment from Rikki66
This promises to be the start of an interesting novella or novel at least a much longer story. Who is she, whose shapely legs, is she with child, who is he? Why? Why?
reply by the author on 09-Apr-2019
This promises to be the start of an interesting novella or novel at least a much longer story. Who is she, whose shapely legs, is she with child, who is he? Why? Why?
Comment Written 09-Apr-2019
reply by the author on 09-Apr-2019
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Thank you so much, Rikki. I'm thrilled that this wee flash can evoke somay questions. Lovely. Thanks again. Ulla:))
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Most welcome.
Rikki
Comment from estory
This has a really eerie feel to it, and I think you really turned it from this feeling of expecting a loving reunion, maybe of a pregnant wife with her husband, to this image of murder. it was really a shock. The contrast between the beginning and the end couldn't be any sharper, and that gave it a nightmarish effect. We take a look into the darker side of the soul within us, something concealed under this image of beauty and love on the outside of ourselves. estory
reply by the author on 09-Apr-2019
This has a really eerie feel to it, and I think you really turned it from this feeling of expecting a loving reunion, maybe of a pregnant wife with her husband, to this image of murder. it was really a shock. The contrast between the beginning and the end couldn't be any sharper, and that gave it a nightmarish effect. We take a look into the darker side of the soul within us, something concealed under this image of beauty and love on the outside of ourselves. estory
Comment Written 09-Apr-2019
reply by the author on 09-Apr-2019
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Thank you so much, estory. I'm glad you liked it. I quite enjoyed writing it. You're right, how do we know what's buried deep within and what we're capable of. All the best. Ulla:))
Comment from Debra White
Hi Ulla :)
What a gripping flash fiction!
I really enjoyed reading this and I would just love to know the back story - Is the killer the wife or the mistress? Where has he been for the last 6 months? This is one that will stay with me...very well written.
Good luck in the contest. Best wishes, Debra:)
reply by the author on 09-Apr-2019
Hi Ulla :)
What a gripping flash fiction!
I really enjoyed reading this and I would just love to know the back story - Is the killer the wife or the mistress? Where has he been for the last 6 months? This is one that will stay with me...very well written.
Good luck in the contest. Best wishes, Debra:)
Comment Written 09-Apr-2019
reply by the author on 09-Apr-2019
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Thanks a lot, Debra. I'm glad you liked it. Well I see her as being the very pregnant
wife. But all is open to interpretation. All the best. Ulla:)))
Comment from SLMorrical
A great entry into the contest. This flows well. It is an easy read to follow. I know it is hard to write just a certain amount of words. The blackout and killing is something I hear a lot about when I watch true crime stories. Good luck in the contest. Well done.
reply by the author on 09-Apr-2019
A great entry into the contest. This flows well. It is an easy read to follow. I know it is hard to write just a certain amount of words. The blackout and killing is something I hear a lot about when I watch true crime stories. Good luck in the contest. Well done.
Comment Written 08-Apr-2019
reply by the author on 09-Apr-2019
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Thank you so very much. I really appreciate it. All the best. Ulla:)))