Mean Streets
Unsafe to cross streets18 total reviews
Comment from Harry Smith
This is a very interesting poem that is short but filled with plenty of imagery. the picture selection match perfectly with the poem.
reply by the author on 24-Apr-2018
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This is a very interesting poem that is short but filled with plenty of imagery. the picture selection match perfectly with the poem.
Comment Written 24-Apr-2018
reply by the author on 24-Apr-2018
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Thank you Harry for your thoughtful review and five star rating
Comment from rhonnie69
Hello PAMUSART: This poem is extremely profound. It reminds me of me. Too often my mind gets a bit frisky. That's when I know that it's getting a bit risky. I've found that many of us don't really know what a green light means. Through trial and error, I've learned that a green light doesn't mean just, "GO," But what it really means is: "GO...BUT NOT UNTIL IT'S SAFE TO DO SO." I've imagined that my mind couldn't handle my getting myself hit by a speeding train. So I say to my mind: "STOP, LOOK, LISTEN, when the coast is clear, then, "GO." And don't you dare, "GO," by yourself. You'd "BETTER," allow your better judgement escort you." I like your style, Pam. Clever girl. God bless you. rhonnie69.
reply by the author on 24-Apr-2018
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Hello PAMUSART: This poem is extremely profound. It reminds me of me. Too often my mind gets a bit frisky. That's when I know that it's getting a bit risky. I've found that many of us don't really know what a green light means. Through trial and error, I've learned that a green light doesn't mean just, "GO," But what it really means is: "GO...BUT NOT UNTIL IT'S SAFE TO DO SO." I've imagined that my mind couldn't handle my getting myself hit by a speeding train. So I say to my mind: "STOP, LOOK, LISTEN, when the coast is clear, then, "GO." And don't you dare, "GO," by yourself. You'd "BETTER," allow your better judgement escort you." I like your style, Pam. Clever girl. God bless you. rhonnie69.
Comment Written 24-Apr-2018
reply by the author on 24-Apr-2018
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Thank you rhonni for your lovely review and five star rating
Comment from Sandra du Plessis
A very well-written Cinquain. We must be always aware of our surroundings when we walk in the streets. Pay attention to the color of the robot and notice the people and their actions around you.
reply by the author on 24-Apr-2018
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A very well-written Cinquain. We must be always aware of our surroundings when we walk in the streets. Pay attention to the color of the robot and notice the people and their actions around you.
Comment Written 24-Apr-2018
reply by the author on 24-Apr-2018
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Thank you, Sandra for your thoughtful review and excellent rating
Comment from Sharon Haiste
I think this is a good entry for the Cinquain Poetry writing prompt.
Your short verse is cute.
Well done and good luck to you with this one in the competition.
Sharon
reply by the author on 24-Apr-2018
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I think this is a good entry for the Cinquain Poetry writing prompt.
Your short verse is cute.
Well done and good luck to you with this one in the competition.
Sharon
Comment Written 23-Apr-2018
reply by the author on 24-Apr-2018
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Thank you, Sharon for your lovely review and five star rating
Comment from Mary Hollingsworth
First of all best wishes for the contest but you're right we have so many things up in this head sometime we act before we think and running a red light is not one of the things we want to do. Much food for thought here. In few words
reply by the author on 23-Apr-2018
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First of all best wishes for the contest but you're right we have so many things up in this head sometime we act before we think and running a red light is not one of the things we want to do. Much food for thought here. In few words
Comment Written 23-Apr-2018
reply by the author on 23-Apr-2018
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Thank you, Mary for your thoughtful review and five star rating
This poem was inspired by a real life experience. A stranger saved my life in San Francisco by putting his arm out preventing my stepping further into the crosswalk on a green light. An out of control bus was doing about sixty in 25mph zone. I had already looked left and knew nobody was close enough. I almost died by not looking again
Comment from lyenochka
The syllabe count fits the cinquain structure perfectly. I like the humor of "pulling the mind back in" but it's not the mind but the body that needs the mind to help cross the street - at least that's what came to mind when I read this.
reply by the author on 23-Apr-2018
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The syllabe count fits the cinquain structure perfectly. I like the humor of "pulling the mind back in" but it's not the mind but the body that needs the mind to help cross the street - at least that's what came to mind when I read this.
Comment Written 23-Apr-2018
reply by the author on 23-Apr-2018
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Thank you, practical lyenochka for your thoughtful review and excellent rating
Comment from ronnie k
I totally agree, I a poet gives his very though to his poem he, well i for one, will in up like that light you post, stopping, waiting some signal that is already saying WRITE>
reply by the author on 23-Apr-2018
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I totally agree, I a poet gives his very though to his poem he, well i for one, will in up like that light you post, stopping, waiting some signal that is already saying WRITE>
Comment Written 23-Apr-2018
reply by the author on 23-Apr-2018
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Thank you, ronnie for your thoughtful review and excellent rating
Comment from Artasylum
This is fun and funny. It is perfect form... the imagery (the stop light) is perfect for the poem... and I stand with you, I know how to cross the street by myself. yours, diana good read!
reply by the author on 23-Apr-2018
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This is fun and funny. It is perfect form... the imagery (the stop light) is perfect for the poem... and I stand with you, I know how to cross the street by myself. yours, diana good read!
Comment Written 23-Apr-2018
reply by the author on 23-Apr-2018
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Thank you, Diana for your thoughtful review and excellent rating
Comment from royowen
It would be interesting to see a mind crossing a street, unaccompanied, mind you I don't know what a mind looks like, hehehe. Well done, branching into other short forms, an excellent short form. Have you used advanced editor yet Pam? Yes you can centralise it and give it shape, sort of like a vase. Well done, blessings, Roy
reply by the author on 23-Apr-2018
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It would be interesting to see a mind crossing a street, unaccompanied, mind you I don't know what a mind looks like, hehehe. Well done, branching into other short forms, an excellent short form. Have you used advanced editor yet Pam? Yes you can centralise it and give it shape, sort of like a vase. Well done, blessings, Roy
Comment Written 23-Apr-2018
reply by the author on 23-Apr-2018
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Thank you, Roy for your lovely review and excellent rating
I tried to use advance edited but it did not work. I am on iPhone and may have to be on laptop for it to work
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I think you may be right, I use an iPad, but tend to post on my PC.
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I just tried on my laptop. Changed the font size to 20 and it had no effect.
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It's centralising which advanced editior, like on word, you've got left, centre and right, I'm not sure what you mean by the font size, that's nothing to do with centralising. It's on the word icon, but you can only do it on advanced editor on fanstory. Pam,
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Only works on advanced editor, can't do it on the computer, keep trying on advanced editor, I use it in graduating poems like Naani, Nonet or cinquain, shouldn't be a problem,, go to Kris133 on fanstory, I think he's done videos of them.
Comment from The Death
I guess this can be tagged under humor too, apart from the commentary. It's true that sometimes, we do need to check what we're using our mind for, as it might lead to a messy condition otherwise. I enjoyed reading it. Good luck!
reply by the author on 23-Apr-2018
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I guess this can be tagged under humor too, apart from the commentary. It's true that sometimes, we do need to check what we're using our mind for, as it might lead to a messy condition otherwise. I enjoyed reading it. Good luck!
Comment Written 23-Apr-2018
reply by the author on 23-Apr-2018
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Thank you, The Death for your lovely review and excellent rating
