Reviews from

Bee in April

Poem 5/7/5

5 total reviews 
Comment from Mary Hollingsworth
Excellent
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Yes bees are definitely a sure sign of spring as they pollinate the flowers preparing them for Blooming and blossoming. And the Beautiful sycamore tree paints a beautiful picture all by itself in the Mist have a beautiful spring day

 Comment Written 19-Apr-2018

Comment from Cindy McIntyre
Excellent
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Love the image and sounds you wrote about. In just those three little lines, your word choices were perfection. This is a good entry for the contest. I wish you lots of luck.

 Comment Written 19-Apr-2018

Comment from michaelcahill
Excellent
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Love the sound of this quite a bit. It SOUNDS like bees actually. You have the right number of syllables, but your off on the number of syllables in each line. An easy fix without changing a word:

hum of buzzing--4
bee beneath bare sycamore--7
tree on April evening--6

hum of buzzing bee --5
beneath bare sycamore tree --7
on April evening --5

Some would call "evening" three, I think you can find syllable counters that call it two. You can always display it like this "ev'ning" and remove all doubt. I don't think it will be a problem though.

A strong entry once you fix it. Good luck in the contest. :)) mike

 Comment Written 18-Apr-2018


reply by the author on 19-Apr-2018
    Thanks for the positive review - much appreciated zanya
Comment from Alcreator Litt Dear
Excellent
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This speaks about the bee in the evening of April is seen is buzzing under bare sycamore trees, there is doubtful fruition of such presence and action; well said, well done. DR ALCREATOR

 Comment Written 18-Apr-2018

Comment from Blue Hendrix
Excellent
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Great imagery. nicely worded. Good entry for the 5/7/5 contest I think you will do great with this piece. I can almost here the bee buzzing around now. I wish you luck!

 Comment Written 18-Apr-2018