Abused
a free verse on abused women46 total reviews
Comment from Lena Borghi
This is powerful. The way it's written gives me the feeling that the speaker almost dares the abuser, rather than let herself feel victimized. The latter is good and empowering, and I wonder if (in real life) such an attitude would serve to stop the cycle. Good work and kudos on bringing light to this oft forgotten crisis in our society.
Best wishes,
Lena
reply by the author on 22-Mar-2018
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This is powerful. The way it's written gives me the feeling that the speaker almost dares the abuser, rather than let herself feel victimized. The latter is good and empowering, and I wonder if (in real life) such an attitude would serve to stop the cycle. Good work and kudos on bringing light to this oft forgotten crisis in our society.
Best wishes,
Lena
Comment Written 21-Mar-2018
reply by the author on 22-Mar-2018
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Thanks a lot Lena for resonating with the message of the poem. Thanks too, for the warm five stars. Take care. Susan
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You?re welcome, Susan.
Comment from Bill Schott
This free verse, Abused, seems to be coming from the abuser. The first stanza seems separate from the rest, being either another voice; I don't see the connection. Is the word choice 'diluted' supposed to be 'deluded'? The emotion is definitely here, but I find the phrasing hard to piece together.
reply by the author on 21-Mar-2018
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This free verse, Abused, seems to be coming from the abuser. The first stanza seems separate from the rest, being either another voice; I don't see the connection. Is the word choice 'diluted' supposed to be 'deluded'? The emotion is definitely here, but I find the phrasing hard to piece together.
Comment Written 21-Mar-2018
reply by the author on 21-Mar-2018
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It is me toying at the idea of how an abused woman feels, her pain akin to that of a salted a salted fish, wishing to die, but as she dies the abuser catches her eyes speaking of unknown hatred seeing how she had become a monster herself. Tanks for the five stars my friend.
Comment from Liberty Justice
WOW! "Abused" is a world-wide topic, because so many innocent and scared women suffer constant abuse at the man who is suppose to love and take care of them. There are options women can take. When abuse transfers to children, that's when seems woman would have sense enough to get out or something. WELL WRITTEN. liberty justice AFTER contest type in your name in replies.
reply by the author on 22-Mar-2018
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WOW! "Abused" is a world-wide topic, because so many innocent and scared women suffer constant abuse at the man who is suppose to love and take care of them. There are options women can take. When abuse transfers to children, that's when seems woman would have sense enough to get out or something. WELL WRITTEN. liberty justice AFTER contest type in your name in replies.
Comment Written 21-Mar-2018
reply by the author on 22-Mar-2018
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Thanks for resonating with the message of this poem and thanks a lot too,for the bright five stars. Take care. Susan
Comment from jppoet
Sorry, dear friend, this narration, is woeful-. You say it is about OTHER abused women, yet your FIRST PERSON rendition contradicts that- and
makes it ugly. As a Fan of yours, I know you are capable of writing on
more sympathetic subjects. As a friendly suggestion, I think you should
cancel it completely or re-write it from a THIRD PERSON perspective-.
Blessings,
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reply by the author on 21-Mar-2018
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Sorry, dear friend, this narration, is woeful-. You say it is about OTHER abused women, yet your FIRST PERSON rendition contradicts that- and
makes it ugly. As a Fan of yours, I know you are capable of writing on
more sympathetic subjects. As a friendly suggestion, I think you should
cancel it completely or re-write it from a THIRD PERSON perspective-.
Blessings,
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 21-Mar-2018
reply by the author on 21-Mar-2018
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Thanks for the suggestion my friend. The first person view is my personal take as if I have experienced the pain of abused women. It is I believe, a prerogative of the writer to use a particular view that suits best her feelings. We may disagree on styles as individual poets as we choose our own unique signature and only the writer himself will understand that. Sorry, but I can't change or even cancel or re-write it completely. If I get more "two stars reviews" from this site, so be it. My objective is to express, not to seek approval even from my friends. Thanks anyway my friend. God bless and take care. Susan
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OK, Susan, as you wish. I was trying to be helpful and friendly. Blessings, john
Comment from apky
This was best written the way you have for maximum impact: no punctuation, no capitalization, no attempt at rhyming, just letting the words rush over you. The Bing picture used in this short but important work complements your poem.
All those abused women may consider this a tribute to them. Well done.
reply by the author on 21-Mar-2018
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This was best written the way you have for maximum impact: no punctuation, no capitalization, no attempt at rhyming, just letting the words rush over you. The Bing picture used in this short but important work complements your poem.
All those abused women may consider this a tribute to them. Well done.
Comment Written 21-Mar-2018
reply by the author on 21-Mar-2018
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Thanks a lot my friend for the warm review and for the generous stars too. Susan
Comment from karenina
The raw and raged pain is here for us to feel and sense and see....
I am left thinking of how many women are trapped this moment, afraid that to leave would bring certain death.
Hard to believe in the 21st century such inequity flourishes, yet it does...
Hard as nails reality that leaves me wanting to cradle this woman in gentle arms....
Karenina
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The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
reply by the author on 21-Mar-2018
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The raw and raged pain is here for us to feel and sense and see....
I am left thinking of how many women are trapped this moment, afraid that to leave would bring certain death.
Hard to believe in the 21st century such inequity flourishes, yet it does...
Hard as nails reality that leaves me wanting to cradle this woman in gentle arms....
Karenina
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 21-Mar-2018
reply by the author on 21-Mar-2018
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Thanks a lot my friend for the very warm review. You inspired me to be better. God bless. Susan
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Socially important poem!--Karenina
