Comment from Ben Colder

Excellent

I would wager James will come up with something. The child drawings reminds me when my young son drew his mother's picture in a contest and won 10 dollars. He was 8 and grew to be a graphic artist. I see no fault. Thanks Sandy.

 Comment Written 18-Mar-2018

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reply by the author on 18-Mar-2018

Thank you so much, Ben. I have a collection of drawings from my two sons and now from my grandchildren. I treasure them, but they aren't very complimentary! LOL. I'm sure you are so proud of your son. Do you still have the drawing? I'm a bit of a hoarder when it comes to the things mine have done. I think it's a woman thing! lol. Thank you my dear friend. Big hugs. Sandy. xxx

Comment from beizanten

Excellent

Very interesting and intriguing and well written past chapter summary. The characters are interesting and their emotion flow well bringing them and the story to life. Interesting plotline. You done great, keep up the good work.

 Comment Written 18-Mar-2018

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reply by the author on 18-Mar-2018

Thank you so much, Beizanten, for reading my story. I'm pleased you enjoyed it. :) Sandra xx

Comment from barbara.wilkey

Exceptional

Once again you did a wonderful job writing this post and you left a wonderful job. I can't wait to find out why Joe looks like death.

"I knew we could depend on Veronica to come through, and with Mildred's input, they make a great team." (I'm thinking, "They make a great team. should be a separate sentence.)

"Miss Veronica?" Mildred's call interrupted my thoughts, bringing me back to the present.
I stood up, and after leaving the room, I headed towards the top of the stairs. "I'm up here," I called back. (you need a space between the two dialogues)

We quickly took off our coats and shoes, and after drying my hair, (extra spaces before hair)

 Comment Written 18-Mar-2018

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reply by the author on 18-Mar-2018

Thank you so very much, Barbara, for this really helpful review, and all those shiny stars! You are so nice, my friend. I'm really pleased you enjoy my story. I'm really enjoying your ghost story with Paige. I read a chapter a night. Thanks again, my friend. :) Big hugs, Sandra xxx

Comment from Joy Graham

Excellent

Hi Sandra,

I'm sorry to have been absent reading your story in the last while. My ipad was acting up and not charging. We now have a new power cord so will see how long it keeps my ipad working. Now I have a lot of catching up to do of your story.

- "Mildred turned the painting so that he could look at (it)." - add "it" to the end of this sentence I think.

- "...will help enormously if everyone agrees with (the) idea." - add "the" in there.

The sunglasses are green. Good timing for St. Patrick's Day yesterday :) I'm trying to decide if it's sun glasses as two words or one word, sunglasses.

Joy xx

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 Comment Written 18-Mar-2018

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reply by the author on 18-Mar-2018

Thank you sooooo much, Joy, for spotting those errors. I've made the corrections. I think my brain is on strike! LOL, I didn't think of St. Patrick's Day, yes they are, aren't they. No, I checked on the sunglasses, one word. There are so many words that can be joined or separated in the English language, it's quite frustrating at times. Thank you, my friend, for a lovely, helpful review! Big hugs. Sandra xxx

Comment from Janilou

Excellent

I think I came across another chapter in your story last week. It's difficult for me to figure out what's happening, coming in at this advanced stage of the novel, of course.
The change from third person to first person threw me a little. Wasn't sure how or why that fit in, but I'm sure you can explain. :-)


Ann was giggling as we crashed in through the kitchen door, both of us soaked through. We quickly took off our coats and shoes, and after drying my hair, I followed went into the sitting room.

There is an extra space that needs to be removed between the words 'drying my' and 'hair'

So Michael calls her 'Nanan' ? Just wanted to make sure it wasn't a typo.

I like the way you write the 'slang' language such as - unlike some writers, yours is easy to read and flows well. Like here:

"Oh, Lordy, time for me t' put the cocoa on!"

I also thought letting Veronica feel the familiar tingling sensation was great. Now I'm just not sure if it means she just traveled in time, or if Joe, poor guy, who looks like death just arrived from time traveling?

travel and traveling -- I'm thinking your spelling with the two 'l' in the word traveled is the UK English spelling?

All the best,
Jan

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 Comment Written 18-Mar-2018

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reply by the author on 18-Mar-2018

Hi Jan, thank you so much for coming along and reading my story. Nanan, was how my two year old son called my mother when he was learning to talk, many years ago, so I used it here. The double 'LL' is the UK English spelling, there are loads of words we spell differently, Jewellery, is another hugely different one. Veronica is back in the past again. Now she has lots of work to do. I've written a synopsis up to this part but forgot to put it on. I'll do that now. Thank you again, I appreciated your review a lot. :) Sandra xxx