Reviews from

Blackberrying

Blank Verse

40 total reviews 
Comment from Sharon Haiste
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

I think this is a well penned free verse about picking memories like fruit.
You've painted a clear picture here with your verse.
Well written, easily understood. Well done.
Sharon

 Comment Written 19-Feb-2018


reply by the author on 19-Feb-2018
    Many thanks, Sharon, for your review of Blackberrying and supportive comments. All the best, Tony
Comment from Pam (respa)
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

-Very nice artwork and presentation.
-A very well penned poem, Tony, that
is full of wonderful imagery and vivid
description that allows the reader to
share in this experience.
-I like the first two lines because
of the creative comparison relating
"the bramble years" to memories.
-You tell a wonderful story, as well.
-The conclusion is excellent:
"for in these pickings we were sealing bonds...
a friendship now that's crystallised in words."
-Mere words in my review cannot express how
much I like this poem nor can the number of stars.



 Comment Written 18-Feb-2018


reply by the author on 19-Feb-2018
    I very much appreciate this review, Pam, especially your closing words! Thanks, too, for the six stars. Glad you enjoyed this fond memory I have of wonderful adventures with my uncle. All the best, Tony
reply by Pam (respa) on 19-Feb-2018
    You are very welcome and deserving of the stars and review, Tony. I am glad you liked my closing words. It is nice to know it was about your uncle.
Comment from rspoet
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

Hello Tony,
I never picked a blackberry or a blueberry when young. There were none where I grew up.
Though I did sneak down in the early hours to a neighbor's yard and picked a few apples and pears.
I did write a poem once about the wonderful cloudberries from the northern climes. Never ate one, I just liked the name.
Thus, I'll simple share a love of poetry. "Small in stillness," but large in beauty.
I like this blank verse poem, lush with imagery. I can see the black stained fingers and tongue.
Six blackberries!
RS

 Comment Written 18-Feb-2018


reply by the author on 19-Feb-2018
    Delicious star-spangled blackberries - almost as good as the ones I picked! 'Thank you! Small in stillness' was my favorite phrase in all of this. Delighted that it appealed to you, too. All the best, Tony
Comment from Barb Hensongispsaca
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

This blank verse, of which I see no extra rhyme and connection from line to line, is very well done in total telling. I can feel the brambles as we hack our way to the end of our search. Excellently done

 Comment Written 18-Feb-2018


reply by the author on 19-Feb-2018
    Many thanks for your review and for the six stars, Barb. Much appreciated. Glad you enjoyed this anecdote - one of my more precious memories of time with my uncle. All the best, Tony
Comment from Pearl Edwards
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Who would have thought a little blackberry picking and jam making could turn into such a delightful poem. Very visual with your descriptions, with the Doric columns of the trees, and the scented eucalyptus leaves. Lovely read Tony, I remember going blackberrying with mum and dad in the Adelaide Hills when we were kids.
Enjoyable read,
cheers.
valda

 Comment Written 18-Feb-2018


reply by the author on 18-Feb-2018
    Thanks, Valda. Glad that this one brought back happy memories! My uncle lived for many years in Crafers, not far from Stirling.
Comment from Marvin Calloway
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Excellent. I wish I could create a poem only half as good.
It seems like you have an abundance of fond memories.
Some favorite lines:
. . . Doric columns soared and took our eyes
beyond the canopy that held our dreams, . . .
An outstanding finish:
. . . for in these pickings we were sealing bonds
more firmly than the lids on jars of fruit,
a friendship now that's crystallized in words.
Sorry, out of 6's.
Marv

 Comment Written 17-Feb-2018


reply by the author on 17-Feb-2018
    Very kind of you to say so, Marv. Appreciated. Best wishes Tony.
Comment from Meia (MESAYERS)
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Today I stretched across the bramble years
to pick the luscious fruits of memory.
In doing so I caught my sleeve in briars;
the blood-stained sleeve on which my heart is worn....You write with the craft of a poet of true talent and a stunning gift. So many stunning images captured here. Truly outstanding, bravo well done kind regards Meia x

 Comment Written 17-Feb-2018


reply by the author on 17-Feb-2018
    Such kind words, Meia. Thank you for picking out one of the parts that you liked best. Tony
reply by Meia (MESAYERS) on 17-Feb-2018
    Those words struck me immediately. Straight away I knew I would have trouble choosing the best! Love and regards Meia x
Comment from IndianaIrish
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Wow, Tony. You attack the blank verse form like a fierce wild cat. I loved your topic, Alliteration, perfect meter, and imagery. Now, I may be wrong, but I thought we were taught not to have any end rhymes in BV? You've got several in this poem of length, so is it okay?
(memory/reverie, worn/thorns, birds;birds/words, eye/eyes, and dreams/seems)
I love your BV, Tony.
Smiles,
Karyn :-)

 Comment Written 17-Feb-2018


reply by the author on 17-Feb-2018
    Oh, dear! I do have a lot of work to do on this one! I thought I'd checked it over better than this for end rhymes. You are right, of course, that they shouldn't be there, except perhaps when they are really well separated in an instance like "worn/thorns" - but even then, better avoided.
    Thank you for your sharp eyes! I shall have to get editing!
    Thanks very much, Karyn. This is a review 'thumb' for sure!
Comment from barbara.wilkey
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

I am sure the birds were not happy that you picked their blackberries, but I happen to love them myself. I do have issues with the insect while picking them. Thank you for sharing this wonderful poem.

 Comment Written 17-Feb-2018


reply by the author on 17-Feb-2018
    Ha! Ha! Our blackberry patch is huge! The birds are welcome to all of the berries out of my reach! About 90% of the crop!
Comment from bichonfrisegirl
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

I love the sentiment behind this write, Tony ... that bonding was even better than the actual berry picking and jam making experiences (delightful as they were). Yes, sharing such experiences with another forges close bonds.

You created a living imagery with your wise choice of wording as you walk your reader through the berry picking with you. When those bumper crops of berries are ripe for the picking, one thinks of a million ways to use up the fruits. Making jam is a great way to use up a whack of them.

An enjoyable Blank Verse poem! ~~ Connie


 Comment Written 17-Feb-2018


reply by the author on 17-Feb-2018
    Thanks, Connie. The friendships forged in joint endeavours of this kind are often among our most precious.
reply by bichonfrisegirl on 17-Feb-2018
    They sure are! :)