Reviews from

haiku (hepatica blooms)

haiku: rebirth

28 total reviews 
Comment from ameen786
Excellent
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A picture perfect haiku with the right words matching the artwork; "colorful breadth,"-unique and beautiful description;thanks for the delight and good luck!

 Comment Written 15-Feb-2018


reply by the author on 16-Feb-2018
    Hello ameen,

    Thank you for your kind review! I loved penning this work.

    diane
Comment from The kurlman
Excellent
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This poem is not only beautiful but you have given us an education in this wild flower. Thank you, for both. I admit after reading your comment, the poem became more vivid and easier to understand. The kurlman

 Comment Written 15-Feb-2018


reply by the author on 16-Feb-2018
    Hello!
    The hepatica is such a beautiful flower! I just wish it didn't have so many syllables: I could have chosen a different verb!

    Thank you for your kind review!
    diane
Comment from royowen
Excellent
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I love to see the life thrust itself through the tough aperture it's give to reach for the life giving sun, it's fascinating to see a small wildflower break the small crack in a concrete walkway, well done Diane, you've said an awful lot in such a small space, well done, good luck in the haiku contest, good satori, blessings, Roy

 Comment Written 15-Feb-2018


reply by the author on 16-Feb-2018
    Hello Roy!
    So very pleased that you enjoyed my offering.

    Thank you very much!
    diane
reply by royowen on 16-Feb-2018
    Most welcome Diane
Comment from Thomas Bowling
Excellent
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A beautiful poem about a beautiful flower. Plants don't need our help to provide enjoyment. They create joy on their own. One of God's many free gifts.

 Comment Written 15-Feb-2018


reply by the author on 16-Feb-2018
    Hello Thomas,
    The hepatica is definitely a lovely spring flower, but perhaps not as beautiful of the Texas bluebonnet!

    Thank you for your thoughtful review!
    diane
Comment from Dolly'sPoems
Excellent
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I love that, tenacious herald! Such perfect words with an ancient twist to it, I wish you luck with the contest, this is beautiful, loved it, best wishes, love Dolly x

 Comment Written 15-Feb-2018


reply by the author on 15-Feb-2018
    Oh Dolly
    I have only one word to express this haiku: WHEW! :)

    Thank you for appreciating my humble offering. I just am so looking forward to our snow disappearing and our hepatica blooming!

    diane
Comment from Pantygynt
Excellent
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There are more rules to haiku than you can shake a stick at and they are not always declared in the contest announcements. This does not mean that they won't be taken into account by the committee -- a law unto themselves if ever there was one -- who do the judging. The first two lines of haiku should make up a single grammatical sentence. This one is two distinct statements even with blooms used as a verb because in common use the verb is intransitive and therefore takes no object. However there is an archaic use of the word that is transitive so that lets you off the hook. I wonder if the committee know that. The satori line is fine and should stay as it is.

 Comment Written 15-Feb-2018


reply by the author on 15-Feb-2018
    Hello Pantygynt,
    Thank you ever so much for your review. As I share in the footnotes, "blooms" is employed as a verb in the first line; thus, the two lines equal a cohesive "single grammatical sentence:" Hepatica blooms woodlands' first colorful breath.
    If I had not meant for blooms to be a verb, I would have punctuated the line such as Hepaticas' blooms ... and then the two lines would not equate to a "single grammatical sentence." Does that make sense?
    Hepatica also poses a problem in that it is four syllables, but I just cannot refer to it by its more common name, Liverwort!
    I so appreciate your input.
    Will keep plugging away.
    diane

reply by Pantygynt on 15-Feb-2018
    But another rule states no punctuation in haiku! I understood bloom to be an intransitive verb which, for the most part it is, but apparently it has an archaic meaning that is transitive and that lets you off the hook and puts the egg on my face. I have reassessed and regraded as 5. Please accept my apologies.
reply by the author on 15-Feb-2018
    Oh goodness!
    No egg whatsoever!
    I sincerely appreciate your time and thoughtful review.
    I have assembled numerous articles regarding haiku; it is a rather unnerving poem to tackle.
    As for the punctuation, I also have articles which contend that poets of haiku may employ the colon, dashes, and ellipses...Oye!
    I bet this little flower never dreamt it would/could cause such anguish.
    Next time: trillium for sure!
    Have a wonderful day!
    diane
reply by the author on 15-Feb-2018
    That's okay, Pantygynt,
    I imagine there are a number of folks who think I am a bit archaic as well... :)
Comment from Sharon Haiste
Excellent
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I think that this is a good entry for the Haiku Poetry writing prompt.
Well done, well said.
Good luck to you with this one in the competition.
Sharon

 Comment Written 15-Feb-2018


reply by the author on 19-Feb-2018
    Hi Sharon!
    Glad you enjoyed!

    diane
Comment from ExperiencingLiphe
Excellent
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They are very pretty. I don't like flowers but I will give you that. So are these flowers the first sign of spring? We went for our first walk today, it was 43 degrees. I didn't even wear a coat, I just put a hoodie on and went. It was just what I needed.

 Comment Written 14-Feb-2018


reply by the author on 19-Feb-2018
    Hello ExperiencingLiphe!
    You don't like flowers?
    Inconceivable! :)
    Thank you for your accepting and kind review, nonetheless! :)

    diane
reply by ExperiencingLiphe on 19-Feb-2018
    They remind me of death cuz that's what funeral homes smell like
Comment from krys123
Excellent
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Cheers Mrs. KT;
-I love haiku and especially how people write them and conceive and compose the conceptual themes with a great satori.
-Your first two lines I definitely grammatically connected and show a demonstratively descriptive imagery that's related to the picture and of the flower that the conceptual theme is referring to. This creates a vivid affinity and explanation of the expression of the moment. Which is a present moment which is necessary in a haiku.
-You covered the seasonal reference by mentioning blooms which is part of spring.
-Your satori gives that aha moment for that spontaneous reflection of the conceptual themes awareness. Also, it summarizes The conception of the theme and relates it to the first two grammatically connected lines.
-Thanks for sharing this, Mrs. KT, and take care and have a good one especially with all those that love you dearly.
Alex

 Comment Written 14-Feb-2018


reply by the author on 14-Feb-2018
    Hello Alex,
    I am deeply honored and humbled by your review of my haiku. These are challenging to pen.

    Many thanks!
    diane
reply by krys123 on 15-Feb-2018
    All you are very welcome, Diane, take care and have a good one.
    Alex
    PS: there used to be a haiku club for Wilde it and we even wrote the book with a haiku's in it.
Comment from Mike J
Excellent
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Really nice Haiku poem, meets the Haiku 5-7-5 syllable count. Really like the metaphor in the second line and nice picture fits the poem. Good luck in contest.

 Comment Written 14-Feb-2018


reply by the author on 19-Feb-2018
    Hi Mike!
    I loved penning this one!
    Thank you for your complimentary review!
    diane