It's There We Fare To Die
Just a poem39 total reviews
Comment from Dolly'sPoems
A dark poem about death and where it occurs and death will be the destiny of all of us in the end, a chilling and pragmatic write about the end of life, love Dolly x x x
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A dark poem about death and where it occurs and death will be the destiny of all of us in the end, a chilling and pragmatic write about the end of life, love Dolly x x x
Comment Written 20-Jul-2023
Comment from CD Richards
I have only ever seen the word spelled "betwixt", so I checked, and couldn't find a source for the "betwixed" spelling, but that doesn't mean there isn't one.
Good alliteration in this. Also, I'm sure there is a name for the technique you've used with "dead red barn and dark dead shed". I have no idea what it is called, but it's very effective. A very nice, atmospheric feel to this, good job.
Craig
reply by the author on 14-Feb-2018
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I have only ever seen the word spelled "betwixt", so I checked, and couldn't find a source for the "betwixed" spelling, but that doesn't mean there isn't one.
Good alliteration in this. Also, I'm sure there is a name for the technique you've used with "dead red barn and dark dead shed". I have no idea what it is called, but it's very effective. A very nice, atmospheric feel to this, good job.
Craig
Comment Written 13-Feb-2018
reply by the author on 14-Feb-2018
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Betwixed is an archaic term for between Craig. It is an old saying used here. Thank you very much my friend. tom
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Hi Tom, I know about betwixed, but it's spelled betwixt :) Cheers, Craig
Comment from Priest B. Brown
I've seen the ruins of many an old farm crossing through the plains. Your description not only brings those images to mind but have an air of loss and sorrow to it.
Adding the fishing net, abandoned and no longer of use, contrasts with the hands that once cast it, probably feeling the same.
A truly thought-provoking work.
reply by the author on 14-Feb-2018
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I've seen the ruins of many an old farm crossing through the plains. Your description not only brings those images to mind but have an air of loss and sorrow to it.
Adding the fishing net, abandoned and no longer of use, contrasts with the hands that once cast it, probably feeling the same.
A truly thought-provoking work.
Comment Written 12-Feb-2018
reply by the author on 14-Feb-2018
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Thank you Priest. tom
Comment from George Jr
I wish I could figure out why they are going the barn to die. I like the poem and have a strong connection to the sea so enjoyed setting description and all the rhymes but I missed the plot of why they are there. If you get a chance please enlighten me. Thank you for sharing this poem.
reply by the author on 14-Feb-2018
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I wish I could figure out why they are going the barn to die. I like the poem and have a strong connection to the sea so enjoyed setting description and all the rhymes but I missed the plot of why they are there. If you get a chance please enlighten me. Thank you for sharing this poem.
Comment Written 12-Feb-2018
reply by the author on 14-Feb-2018
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Thank you George. tom
Comment from Teri7
This is a very interesting and well written poem you have penned about the red dead barn. It made me think of the red barn behind our son's house that looks about dead to. Blessings, Teri
reply by the author on 14-Feb-2018
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This is a very interesting and well written poem you have penned about the red dead barn. It made me think of the red barn behind our son's house that looks about dead to. Blessings, Teri
Comment Written 12-Feb-2018
reply by the author on 14-Feb-2018
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Thank you Teri. tom
Comment from Debbie Pope
What an exquisite poem! I fell in love with the title. This could have been in my high school literature book. I see what you mean about your fondness for classic poetry. Thank goodness there are poets like yourself who will not let that style die. I could not begin to do it justice.
reply by the author on 14-Feb-2018
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What an exquisite poem! I fell in love with the title. This could have been in my high school literature book. I see what you mean about your fondness for classic poetry. Thank goodness there are poets like yourself who will not let that style die. I could not begin to do it justice.
Comment Written 12-Feb-2018
reply by the author on 14-Feb-2018
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Thank you very much Debbie. Most honored. tom
Comment from catch22
Hi Tom, what a haunting and lovely poem about the dying process! It reminds me of animals that choose to die alone at their ending. Outstanding flow and good use of internal and cross rhymes in the poem. You build a solemn mood in such a short poem.
reply by the author on 14-Feb-2018
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Hi Tom, what a haunting and lovely poem about the dying process! It reminds me of animals that choose to die alone at their ending. Outstanding flow and good use of internal and cross rhymes in the poem. You build a solemn mood in such a short poem.
Comment Written 12-Feb-2018
reply by the author on 14-Feb-2018
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Thank you so much friend. I am very honored by this exceptional review. Thanks again. tom
Comment from tfawcus
There's great musicality in this assonant piece, Tom, and the melancholy feel of a deserted landscape. One might imagine an old township, fallen into ruin, along with the dreams of those who used to dwell there. All that remains is the whistling of the wind through the skeletons of its past.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
reply by the author on 14-Feb-2018
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There's great musicality in this assonant piece, Tom, and the melancholy feel of a deserted landscape. One might imagine an old township, fallen into ruin, along with the dreams of those who used to dwell there. All that remains is the whistling of the wind through the skeletons of its past.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 12-Feb-2018
reply by the author on 14-Feb-2018
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Thank you so much my friend. I'm not sure where this came from. lol Thanks again. Take care. tom
Comment from rama devi
Wow, this one is shorter than usual from you, my dear Tom, yet just as powerful! Stark and intense imagery. Fantastic phonetics with alliteration (etc.) and fine internal rhyme. Excellent flow. Eloquent.
Loved reading this line aloud with all the L sounds rolllllling off the tongue:
The broken windmill fills the fallow hill.
Love the W and E sounds here:
In the never-ending wend of wind
love the AY and AI sounds here:
The salt-spray frays once-baited nets -
Love the U and OU sounds here:
We thus discuss the rough of sea
Good use of repeating sounds in the slowing and assonance of E in all lines tempered in counterpoint with D and B:
Wed by tempests true - to the red dead barn,
The dead dark shed and fallow hill;
Betwixed and between - it's there we fare to die.
The visual and auditory aspects are both superb!
Highly original too.
Wow.
Warmly,
Sis
reply by the author on 14-Feb-2018
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Wow, this one is shorter than usual from you, my dear Tom, yet just as powerful! Stark and intense imagery. Fantastic phonetics with alliteration (etc.) and fine internal rhyme. Excellent flow. Eloquent.
Loved reading this line aloud with all the L sounds rolllllling off the tongue:
The broken windmill fills the fallow hill.
Love the W and E sounds here:
In the never-ending wend of wind
love the AY and AI sounds here:
The salt-spray frays once-baited nets -
Love the U and OU sounds here:
We thus discuss the rough of sea
Good use of repeating sounds in the slowing and assonance of E in all lines tempered in counterpoint with D and B:
Wed by tempests true - to the red dead barn,
The dead dark shed and fallow hill;
Betwixed and between - it's there we fare to die.
The visual and auditory aspects are both superb!
Highly original too.
Wow.
Warmly,
Sis
Comment Written 12-Feb-2018
reply by the author on 14-Feb-2018
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Thank you once again sis. tom
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:-))
