A Lion in the Hallway
A recollection of a visit by an uncle and aunt42 total reviews
Comment from strandregs
great story and story telling.
although the details are welcome, I felt the first part
went a tad too much.
Maybe I'm the impatient adrenalin age?
somehow a snoring woman sounds gross.
men just sound awful. :-))Z.
reply by the author on 19-Mar-2018
great story and story telling.
although the details are welcome, I felt the first part
went a tad too much.
Maybe I'm the impatient adrenalin age?
somehow a snoring woman sounds gross.
men just sound awful. :-))Z.
Comment Written 19-Mar-2018
reply by the author on 19-Mar-2018
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Thank you very much for your comments and viewpoint. They are appreciated.
Comment from Mustang Patty
LOL!!
I can only imagine what it would be like to hear snoring for the first time. My own children got to experience snoring for all of their lives, so it wouldn't be a surprise.
I loved the way you built up to the conclusion. Great way to build a story.
Thank you for sharing and I wish you luck in the contest,
~patty~
reply by the author on 19-Mar-2018
LOL!!
I can only imagine what it would be like to hear snoring for the first time. My own children got to experience snoring for all of their lives, so it wouldn't be a surprise.
I loved the way you built up to the conclusion. Great way to build a story.
Thank you for sharing and I wish you luck in the contest,
~patty~
Comment Written 19-Mar-2018
reply by the author on 19-Mar-2018
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Patty, thank you very much for your comments and stars.
Comment from braden.savage2000
This is a wonderful, humorous story, and quite honestly, I didn't expect the ending until it came! Congratulations, Mr. King, keep up the great work! My only minor critique comes in the line "The milkman hasn't arrived, and the neighbors were still asleep." I believe it should be "The milkman hadn't arrived, and the neighbors were still asleep," so the tenses match. Keep up the good work! All the best, B.
reply by the author on 19-Mar-2018
This is a wonderful, humorous story, and quite honestly, I didn't expect the ending until it came! Congratulations, Mr. King, keep up the great work! My only minor critique comes in the line "The milkman hasn't arrived, and the neighbors were still asleep." I believe it should be "The milkman hadn't arrived, and the neighbors were still asleep," so the tenses match. Keep up the good work! All the best, B.
Comment Written 19-Mar-2018
reply by the author on 19-Mar-2018
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Thank you very much for the stars and your recommendation.
Comment from Zue65
My goodness, I never heard such a loud snore that sounded like the loin's roar. LOL. I like the humor infused in this post, I enjoyed reading from beginning to end. Very well done. Keep writing.
reply by the author on 19-Mar-2018
My goodness, I never heard such a loud snore that sounded like the loin's roar. LOL. I like the humor infused in this post, I enjoyed reading from beginning to end. Very well done. Keep writing.
Comment Written 19-Mar-2018
reply by the author on 19-Mar-2018
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Thank you very much.
Comment from Octavia
Very well and clearly written,Henry. I liked hearing about the "good old days" and found it very interesting. I can imagine two young kids thinking loud snoring was like a lions roar.
I'm also thinking, if we don't straighten out our world (and soon), we'll all have to live like that. lol
Good luck in the contest.
reply by the author on 19-Mar-2018
Very well and clearly written,Henry. I liked hearing about the "good old days" and found it very interesting. I can imagine two young kids thinking loud snoring was like a lions roar.
I'm also thinking, if we don't straighten out our world (and soon), we'll all have to live like that. lol
Good luck in the contest.
Comment Written 18-Mar-2018
reply by the author on 19-Mar-2018
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Thank you very much.
Comment from Mabaker
Not bad, quite funny. The kids must have wondered what on eath had invaded their home. A lion might have provided some fun, after they got over their fright that is.
Very well put together Sincerely Anne
reply by the author on 18-Mar-2018
Not bad, quite funny. The kids must have wondered what on eath had invaded their home. A lion might have provided some fun, after they got over their fright that is.
Very well put together Sincerely Anne
Comment Written 18-Mar-2018
reply by the author on 18-Mar-2018
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I was one of those kids. Thank you very much for the comments and review.
Comment from Mrs. KT
Hello Henry,
I cannot decide which is more comical: the snoring or the children's reactions! I am going with the children. And I can just imagine how they would have thought that a lion was in their midst having listen to some pretty professional snorers in my day! A delightful clip of childhood. Thank you for sharing!
diane
reply by the author on 18-Mar-2018
Hello Henry,
I cannot decide which is more comical: the snoring or the children's reactions! I am going with the children. And I can just imagine how they would have thought that a lion was in their midst having listen to some pretty professional snorers in my day! A delightful clip of childhood. Thank you for sharing!
diane
Comment Written 18-Mar-2018
reply by the author on 18-Mar-2018
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Thank you very much.
Comment from mvbrooks
This is a delightful story of a bygone era and the descriptions of the Aunt, Uncle, and their farm are clear and nostalgic. The story seems one that might have been told many times within the family and the reader figures out the roaring is the visitors when remembering that the visitors hadn't brought any pets with them. Fun, sweet story.
reply by the author on 17-Mar-2018
This is a delightful story of a bygone era and the descriptions of the Aunt, Uncle, and their farm are clear and nostalgic. The story seems one that might have been told many times within the family and the reader figures out the roaring is the visitors when remembering that the visitors hadn't brought any pets with them. Fun, sweet story.
Comment Written 17-Mar-2018
reply by the author on 17-Mar-2018
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Thank you very much. Your tag has the initials and name of one of my sister's daughters. That daughter knows this story well; having heard it from three points of view her mother's, her grandmother's and an uncle's.
Comment from Meia (MESAYERS)
The lion's roars were my uncle and aunt snoring in tandem. My sister and I had never before heard anyone snore.' Lol my parents sound like that asleep- my mother alone. It seems to be age related because if I sleep on my back I now snore too. Age, terrible thing. A wonderful write well done kind regards Meia xx
reply by the author on 17-Mar-2018
The lion's roars were my uncle and aunt snoring in tandem. My sister and I had never before heard anyone snore.' Lol my parents sound like that asleep- my mother alone. It seems to be age related because if I sleep on my back I now snore too. Age, terrible thing. A wonderful write well done kind regards Meia xx
Comment Written 17-Mar-2018
reply by the author on 17-Mar-2018
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Thank you very much for your comments and stars.
Comment from MelB
Hi Henry, I truly enjoyed reading the story! I knew there wasn't a lion in the house, but was waiting to see what it was. It makes perfect sense.
reply by the author on 17-Mar-2018
Hi Henry, I truly enjoyed reading the story! I knew there wasn't a lion in the house, but was waiting to see what it was. It makes perfect sense.
Comment Written 17-Mar-2018
reply by the author on 17-Mar-2018
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Thank you very much. It was fun writing about it.