Prisms of Life
5 line poem contest entry18 total reviews
Comment from BeasPeas
We can present many different faces depending upon what's going on in our lives at the time. I guess they all represent the faceted parts of us as the image shows in its fragmented way. Well done. An interesting concept. Marilyn
reply by the author on 09-Feb-2018
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We can present many different faces depending upon what's going on in our lives at the time. I guess they all represent the faceted parts of us as the image shows in its fragmented way. Well done. An interesting concept. Marilyn
Comment Written 08-Feb-2018
reply by the author on 09-Feb-2018
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Hi Marilyn Great to hear from you hope all is good Thabks for review a different perspective for this one Cheers Christine xx
Comment from Pantygynt
I have to say at the start, despite liking this poem's content greatly, that I regard prisms as a two syllable word. Prism is one of a very few words, rhythm is another which, despite having only one vowel symbol has two vowel sounds pris-um. It is impossible to enunciate without that second vowel sound. In its adjectival form, prismatic, however it is possible to move from the sibilant 's' to the 'm' without enunciating a vowel sound and, once again, rhythmic works similarly. As such I do not believe the committee, whever they may be, will consider this, which, in my opinion is a pity but correct.
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reply by the author on 08-Feb-2018
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I have to say at the start, despite liking this poem's content greatly, that I regard prisms as a two syllable word. Prism is one of a very few words, rhythm is another which, despite having only one vowel symbol has two vowel sounds pris-um. It is impossible to enunciate without that second vowel sound. In its adjectival form, prismatic, however it is possible to move from the sibilant 's' to the 'm' without enunciating a vowel sound and, once again, rhythmic works similarly. As such I do not believe the committee, whever they may be, will consider this, which, in my opinion is a pity but correct.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 08-Feb-2018
reply by the author on 08-Feb-2018
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Hi Pantygynt, Thanks for your review and yes I can see your point and I thought the same that prism would ne 2 syllables however when checkng syllable counters they all gave it one syllable so I went with that .I find it confusing at times because I try to be correct in these contests and find the right words to meet requirement and have differing opinions from various reviewers re syllables etc, I have asked Tom what is the accepted syllable counter that FS uses when checking entries but did not receive any guidance on the one we should use so I always check with three or four different sources. I only had the one word prisms originally when I first wrote this but added the word lifes to make up the second syllable. Confusing to say the least but I suppose I will just have to wait and see. I do thank you for your feedback Cheers Christine
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I have never held any store by syllable counters and maintain that syllables are 100% an oral/aural thing rather than visual. I wonder what they say about rhythm. We shall have to wait and see.
Comment from Meia (MESAYERS)
An exceptional poem and I loved the striking artwork too. I hope you do well in the competition for the five line poem this is truly beautiful and a joy to read warmest wishes and kindest regards Meia xx
reply by the author on 08-Feb-2018
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An exceptional poem and I loved the striking artwork too. I hope you do well in the competition for the five line poem this is truly beautiful and a joy to read warmest wishes and kindest regards Meia xx
Comment Written 07-Feb-2018
reply by the author on 08-Feb-2018
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Hi Meia, Thanks very much for your review and your kind wishes for this entry. We will wait and see Cheers Christine
Comment from frierajac
I like this one very much as it reminds me of a manuscript I published in my early days as a poet, 'Through the Prism'. Most of the copies gone now. This seems to illustrate the many moods and emotions that may be reflected in a person's visage,
or the mind, as it is reflecting.
reply by the author on 08-Feb-2018
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I like this one very much as it reminds me of a manuscript I published in my early days as a poet, 'Through the Prism'. Most of the copies gone now. This seems to illustrate the many moods and emotions that may be reflected in a person's visage,
or the mind, as it is reflecting.
Comment Written 07-Feb-2018
reply by the author on 08-Feb-2018
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Hi frierjac, Thank you for your review and yes I think we are all a prism of many different angles and colours depending on ones mood and action on any given time Cheers Christine
Comment from Dorothy Farrell
Hi Chrissy, this is a good five line poem with the perfect picture with all the parallel lines. But, check your line 7 syllable - I make 8. Good entry and I like the words you wrote. If it is 8 you can soon remedy. Good luck. Warm regards Dorothy xx
reply by the author on 08-Feb-2018
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Hi Chrissy, this is a good five line poem with the perfect picture with all the parallel lines. But, check your line 7 syllable - I make 8. Good entry and I like the words you wrote. If it is 8 you can soon remedy. Good luck. Warm regards Dorothy xx
Comment Written 07-Feb-2018
reply by the author on 08-Feb-2018
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Hi Dorothy, Thanks for reviewing my contest entry and yes I have changed line 7 removed the word as and yes I had a couple of reviewers with similar comments however the syllable counter give conflicting counts some 7 some 8 so I we t with my gut feeling in the end We shall see .Cheers Christine
Comment from Sandra du Plessis
A very well-written five line poem. The way we live our lives are a reflection of what goes on inside our souls. Many people think they can hide their inner character but their behavior reveals everything.
reply by the author on 07-Feb-2018
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A very well-written five line poem. The way we live our lives are a reflection of what goes on inside our souls. Many people think they can hide their inner character but their behavior reveals everything.
Comment Written 06-Feb-2018
reply by the author on 07-Feb-2018
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Hi Sandra, Thanks so much and yes I think without even trying our soul is often on view with behaviour. I do appreciate ypur review Cheers Christine
Comment from lyenochka
Really well done, Christine! I like how "life's prisms" change our "many faces." People are not always the same through all the different stages of life. But we can appreciate the "rainbow coloured images" and try to understand their souls.
reply by the author on 06-Feb-2018
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Really well done, Christine! I like how "life's prisms" change our "many faces." People are not always the same through all the different stages of life. But we can appreciate the "rainbow coloured images" and try to understand their souls.
Comment Written 06-Feb-2018
reply by the author on 06-Feb-2018
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Hi lyenochka, Thanks very much And yes our prism faces are always changing and I thought the rainbow connection may highlight this still Cheers Christine
Comment from Joan E.
The artwork you selected is so parallel to the reflections in your poem. I greatly admired your "prisms" and "mirrors" metaphors. Best wishes in the 5 Line Poem contest- Joan
reply by the author on 06-Feb-2018
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The artwork you selected is so parallel to the reflections in your poem. I greatly admired your "prisms" and "mirrors" metaphors. Best wishes in the 5 Line Poem contest- Joan
Comment Written 05-Feb-2018
reply by the author on 06-Feb-2018
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Hi Joan, Thank ypu for reading and reviewing this poem I am pleased you admired my metaphors to highlight the changes we go through Cheers Christine
Comment from Sharon Haiste
I think this is a good entry for the 5 Line Poem writing prompt.
Well said, a good message in just 5 lines.
Good luck to you with the competition.
Sharon
reply by the author on 06-Feb-2018
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I think this is a good entry for the 5 Line Poem writing prompt.
Well said, a good message in just 5 lines.
Good luck to you with the competition.
Sharon
Comment Written 05-Feb-2018
reply by the author on 06-Feb-2018
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Hi Sharon, Thanks for a look in for this poem I did mull over the words and construction of this poem to make ot sensible but identifiable asxwell Cheers Christine
Comment from Pam (respa)
-Intriguing image and good presentation.
-Good imagery and description.
-I like the comparison between the prisms and the face.
-The conclusion is also good.
-Good luck in the contest, Christine.
reply by the author on 06-Feb-2018
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-Intriguing image and good presentation.
-Good imagery and description.
-I like the comparison between the prisms and the face.
-The conclusion is also good.
-Good luck in the contest, Christine.
Comment Written 05-Feb-2018
reply by the author on 06-Feb-2018
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Hi Pam, Thank your so much for your review and suggestion re the syllables .
I always check several different syllable counters when I enter a contest specific to syllables and most gave me 7 syllables for this line breaking images into 2 i. e im-ages ( 2) others gave three like you highlighted so It is always an issue to be contested . I find this very confusing at times and have even asked .Tom' to clarifiy which syllable coumter FanStory uses as we should all use the same one to avoid conflict. However I did not get a suggested one so I have no idea which one to rely on. I find this very annoying as reviewers all give different opinions on syllables and I do appreciate feedback . I am not sure how to rectify this issue have you got any suggestions? Or should I just wait unti the ' committe' who ever they are to send back a not meeting syllable requirement before voting commences . Cheers Christine
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First, I just updated your review. It is my understanding there are a good number of sources the committee uses, but no one knows what they are. I use howmanysyllables.com I would wait and see what you are told. There is a free form tanka, so maybe that would even apply. You are welcome for the review, and I appreciate your concern.
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Hi Pam, Yes I will wait and see I wish this site would let everyone know what counter people can use so we are all on the same page. Cheers Christine
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I apologize, Christine, because I was thinking you were doing a tanka. That line has to be 7 syllables. Also, in a cash contest, you are not told anything, unlike the site contests. I would try a third site to see if 2 out of 3 match up. Good luck.
One suggestion: try to say 'images' out loud in a regular voice, and see how many you get. Another thing I just realized about the word is if you take the second part-ages- you have to say it with 2. Hope this helps.
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Hi Pam Thanks so much for your reply and yes I agree with you To me im-a-ges is a 3 syllable word but comes up as 2 in lots of syllable checkers and yes some are 3 so If I get 'scolded ' I will change if necessary. I do appreciate your time and help cheers Christine
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You are welcome for the help, Christine. Don't forget that you are not told anything about your poem in a cash contest.
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Hi Pam, I have relented and have changed the line to read. 'rainbow coloured images' just in case .So hopefully that will be right now Cheers Christine
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I am pretty sure you are right! I was going to say before that if you felt it was right, that it probably was. Hope you do well in the contest. Did any other reviewers comment on it?
