Reviews from

Good bye

A man visits a spot he went with his father as a kid

14 total reviews 
Comment from Alcreator Litt Dear
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

A work of flash fiction is here so nicely completed, I enjoyed the catch in the beginning and the memory of an event and an abrupt accident is appreciably worded. DR ALCREATOR

 Comment Written 04-Jan-2018


reply by the author on 04-Jan-2018
    Thanks
Comment from zekeziemann
Excellent
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A fine and emotional story with just enough words to get the total affect through to the reader. Well done. I too loved my Father and think of him at baseball games that I played in years ago.

 Comment Written 03-Jan-2018


reply by the author on 03-Jan-2018
    Thanks for the great feedback! Much appreciated
Comment from Mustangpatty1029
Excellent
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Hi there;
This is a lovely story about the fragility of the father/son relationship. I can't help but wonder if the secret has to do with the son being gay. (It seems to run through your stories, so I'm taking a stab at it.)

So sad to think the words were never shared. If the father had lived, would the son have ever told him? I hope so. And I would like to think the father would wrap his arms around his son, and tell him he loved him no matter what.

~patty~

 Comment Written 03-Jan-2018


reply by the author on 03-Jan-2018
    Thanks for the great feedback.! Yeah its certainly possible he?s gay. I might need to work that in sometime. Thanks again
Comment from Rasmine
Excellent
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Hello,
Good writing. Hope it isn't true, though.
I believe that one indicator of really good writing is the ability to make your readers feel something. I feel like crying right now -- so that is a sign that you write very well. :)

 Comment Written 02-Jan-2018


reply by the author on 02-Jan-2018
    Thanks for the great feedback!!its definitely not true, but there?s nothing wrong with having a good cry sometimes!
Comment from Dean Kuch
Excellent
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Wow, Oliver.
An excellent story albeit, a very sad one as well.
Life doesn't always present itself in shades of dark blacks and stark whites.
Sometimes there are grey areas we must see ourselves through.
Great story.
I saw no errors nor anything I would change.
Best wishes to you in the contest.
~Dean

 Comment Written 01-Jan-2018


reply by the author on 01-Jan-2018
    Thanks so much for the great feedback, I really appreciate it! I?m really glad you enjoyed it
reply by Dean Kuch on 01-Jan-2018
    My pleasure.
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Comment from Phyllis Stewart
Excellent
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Touching. Poignant. Sad. But maybe it's just as well that he didn't bring the truth into the open. Sometimes it's easier for everyone to pretend. Now that he can throw the letter away, hopefully he forgave himself... and forgave his dad for dying. Well done!

 Comment Written 01-Jan-2018


reply by the author on 01-Jan-2018
    Thanks for the great feedback, As always!
Comment from robyn corum
Excellent
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Oliver,

This is a super entry for the flash fiction challenge about secrets. It is well written and feels raw and vivid. Great job and good luck!

 Comment Written 01-Jan-2018


reply by the author on 01-Jan-2018
    Thanks a lot for the great feedback, I?m really glad you enjoyed it!
Comment from rtobaygo
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

Good afternoon, Oliver

I enjoyed the post. Powerful memories and emotions which you've captured and expressed beautifully. The attention to detail, the flow and images were all spot on.

take care and stay safe,

Ray

 Comment Written 01-Jan-2018


reply by the author on 01-Jan-2018
    Thanks for the great feedback and the very generous 6 stars. I?m really happy you enjoyed it
Comment from Maria Jose Garcia
Excellent
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Beautiful descriptions, I particularly like: the clouds glowed orange like liquid metal.
The ending is lovely. I didn't expect it.
Very good story. Thanks and good luck in the contest.

 Comment Written 01-Jan-2018


reply by the author on 01-Jan-2018
    Thanks for the great feedback! I?m really glad you enjoyed it
Comment from giraffmang
Excellent
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Hi Oliver,

Very nice opening paragraph. Great hook at the end line of it. (no pun intended)

that was heaven, if if hadn't been for that one thing - if it hadn't.

along the tree line down to the rocks - treeline could be one word here.

I love the descriptive work that you weave in to your short pieces. very organic.

All the best
G

 Comment Written 01-Jan-2018


reply by the author on 01-Jan-2018
    Thanks as always! Much appreciated!