Desolate
Pls see NOTES! (for the new, promised chapbook Jaded Hearts)11 total reviews
Comment from DALLAS01
Why not think outside the box? Poetry is often a story rhymed or metered. My preference is the 2nd one because I think it addresses a larger readership. Good luck on this venture. Happy new Year.
reply by the author on 30-Dec-2017
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Why not think outside the box? Poetry is often a story rhymed or metered. My preference is the 2nd one because I think it addresses a larger readership. Good luck on this venture. Happy new Year.
Comment Written 30-Dec-2017
reply by the author on 30-Dec-2017
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Thank you! Much appreciated, my friend. Happy New Year to you, too. :)
Comment from Commando
In one word, "AWESOME!" A most commendable presentation to all of us on FanStory. Thanks for sharing. I'm mailing you more ink for you're quill so,
"keep on 'a writing, my dear friend!" Happy New Year and God bless.
xx Bill (JF)
reply by the author on 30-Dec-2017
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In one word, "AWESOME!" A most commendable presentation to all of us on FanStory. Thanks for sharing. I'm mailing you more ink for you're quill so,
"keep on 'a writing, my dear friend!" Happy New Year and God bless.
xx Bill (JF)
Comment Written 30-Dec-2017
reply by the author on 30-Dec-2017
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Ah, Bill, you've made my night! Thank you for your wonderful comments, and for your generous gift. I'm over the moon!
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Oh, goodness! I'm the man on the moon--and you're the woman over it! Please, touch down and say, "HELLO!" No reason for the thanks--you earned my gift. xx Bill
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How kind you are - thank you again!
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Oh, you had better stop flirting with me--or, I'll tell Laura Jan! xx Bill
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Ohhhhhhhhh. If I was, it was unintended!
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Sheee!
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LOL.
Comment from GWinterwin
Great poem Dawn with words so well spoken. Desolate are many from many different reasons. Lost love, desperation and sickness, forgotten, battered and bruised. Almighty God is the only true answer, and we must not question him for he is the only perfect one. God bless my friend.
reply by the author on 29-Dec-2017
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Great poem Dawn with words so well spoken. Desolate are many from many different reasons. Lost love, desperation and sickness, forgotten, battered and bruised. Almighty God is the only true answer, and we must not question him for he is the only perfect one. God bless my friend.
Comment Written 28-Dec-2017
reply by the author on 29-Dec-2017
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Thank you, George. I think, though, that He understands when we question. :)
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Yes I agree that he does understand when we question his will and his almighty power and love because we are human. He loves us even when we have doubt and our faith waivers. He loves us and wants the best for us always.
Comment from Giddy Nielsen-Sweep
I like both your poems, Dawn, particularly the first one. And yes, you do do melancholy so well. I don't read melancholy much though and yet I enjoy writing them. I have done some short ones on domestic abuse. Giddy
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I like both your poems, Dawn, particularly the first one. And yes, you do do melancholy so well. I don't read melancholy much though and yet I enjoy writing them. I have done some short ones on domestic abuse. Giddy
Comment Written 27-Dec-2017
Comment from Asem.inspirations
Good morning, Dawn: This is a great poem, both of them. They are both full of the misery that we all face and suffer here in this world. They are also full of the questions that many have asked or will ask again and again because it is only natural to want to know what is going on. What I truly love about these poems is that they are very honest and they show a seeking heart. Surely God can appreciate this too. Have a wonderful day!
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Good morning, Dawn: This is a great poem, both of them. They are both full of the misery that we all face and suffer here in this world. They are also full of the questions that many have asked or will ask again and again because it is only natural to want to know what is going on. What I truly love about these poems is that they are very honest and they show a seeking heart. Surely God can appreciate this too. Have a wonderful day!
Comment Written 27-Dec-2017
Comment from Jay Squires
To one whose soul is spent trying to make the world's wounds whole and be a salve for the victims ... are yourself a victim to uncaring lover who hides behind the lie of loving.
It's up to your usual high caliber expression of personal grief and despair.
It almost seems anticlimactic, but I hope you had a peaceful and lovely Christmas, Dawn.
I've been hard at work away from the site, but coming back to earn a few FS shekels. You made it a delightful way to do that!
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To one whose soul is spent trying to make the world's wounds whole and be a salve for the victims ... are yourself a victim to uncaring lover who hides behind the lie of loving.
It's up to your usual high caliber expression of personal grief and despair.
It almost seems anticlimactic, but I hope you had a peaceful and lovely Christmas, Dawn.
I've been hard at work away from the site, but coming back to earn a few FS shekels. You made it a delightful way to do that!
Comment Written 26-Dec-2017
Comment from royowen
I met a young, (well young to me) philoshy professor yesterday, trying to share why I believed, unfortunately he didn't really believe in original sin, although we both believed in life really having no meaning, (Ecclesiastes) and coming to the shared belief only unconditional love made sense. But I guess your trying to put meaning into a meaningless world. We should keep caring, but it does no good to let it, get to us. You've done a smack up job here Dawn, beautifully designed work, with the enjambment and smooth flow of a superbly written work, iambic pentameter, in ababcdcdefefghghii extra versed sonnet, well done, friend Dawn, blessings, Roy
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I met a young, (well young to me) philoshy professor yesterday, trying to share why I believed, unfortunately he didn't really believe in original sin, although we both believed in life really having no meaning, (Ecclesiastes) and coming to the shared belief only unconditional love made sense. But I guess your trying to put meaning into a meaningless world. We should keep caring, but it does no good to let it, get to us. You've done a smack up job here Dawn, beautifully designed work, with the enjambment and smooth flow of a superbly written work, iambic pentameter, in ababcdcdefefghghii extra versed sonnet, well done, friend Dawn, blessings, Roy
Comment Written 26-Dec-2017
Comment from Sasha
This is so beautifully written and deeply moving. I especially like the smooth rhythm and excellent rhyme of this one. The illustration you picked to accompany this is superb. Thank you for including the second poem, also beautifully written.
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This is so beautifully written and deeply moving. I especially like the smooth rhythm and excellent rhyme of this one. The illustration you picked to accompany this is superb. Thank you for including the second poem, also beautifully written.
Comment Written 26-Dec-2017
Comment from Joan E.
Thank you for the preview of your new chapbook and the consoling music. I admired your evocative, rhythmic and rhymed quatrains and final couplet. Your selection of the picture to parallel the "flower for the grave" is very effective. Your second poem shows how the "suffering" continues, and your use of alliteration intensifies the message and the hopeful prayer. Sighs- Joan
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Thank you for the preview of your new chapbook and the consoling music. I admired your evocative, rhythmic and rhymed quatrains and final couplet. Your selection of the picture to parallel the "flower for the grave" is very effective. Your second poem shows how the "suffering" continues, and your use of alliteration intensifies the message and the hopeful prayer. Sighs- Joan
Comment Written 26-Dec-2017
Comment from Sandra du Plessis
A very well-written poem of the many facets of love and life. Some think love is a tool of taking another in possession and others are taking love as a method to make their partners suffer. True love doesn't do any of those things but respect and protect their partner at any cost.
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A very well-written poem of the many facets of love and life. Some think love is a tool of taking another in possession and others are taking love as a method to make their partners suffer. True love doesn't do any of those things but respect and protect their partner at any cost.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 26-Dec-2017
