His Birthday
Tanka6 total reviews
Comment from Dolly'sPoems
The art of giving has gone from Christmas when there are demands for this and that and when we strip back and get to the real meaning, Christmas is then a joy, love Dolly x
reply by the author on 13-Dec-2017
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The art of giving has gone from Christmas when there are demands for this and that and when we strip back and get to the real meaning, Christmas is then a joy, love Dolly x
Comment Written 13-Dec-2017
reply by the author on 13-Dec-2017
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Yes commerce has enticed kids away from it. I think it?s a shame I think if we thought about his blessings gratitude first then the rest it would be better. Thanks for your kind review
Hugs,Trisha
Comment from smileycloud
very pretty presentation
your poem says it so nicely and has a let us rest and enjoy His birthday now kind of feel to it
I see that the Tanka is five lines of
5/7/5/7/7
I see you have four lines
5/5/7/7
if you add a 7 syllable line in between line 1 and 2 it will be as you describe it I think
perhaps even ;-
"The gift list is made
(All the pressies have been bought)
No stores are needed "
you just might have left your own line out by mistake
blessings
have a smiley day
Lorraine
reply by the author on 12-Dec-2017
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very pretty presentation
your poem says it so nicely and has a let us rest and enjoy His birthday now kind of feel to it
I see that the Tanka is five lines of
5/7/5/7/7
I see you have four lines
5/5/7/7
if you add a 7 syllable line in between line 1 and 2 it will be as you describe it I think
perhaps even ;-
"The gift list is made
(All the pressies have been bought)
No stores are needed "
you just might have left your own line out by mistake
blessings
have a smiley day
Lorraine
Comment Written 12-Dec-2017
reply by the author on 12-Dec-2017
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Yes my brain this week has a mind of its own LOL I got the days all scrambled. My helper was not here and I?ve been thinking it?s Saturday. The ommision was my mistake but you the friend reviewer found the error.
Thank you so much for the honor
Hugs, Trisha
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::))
Comment from sunao
Oh beautiful!! Many people around the world forget the true meaning of Christmas. Where I live, people think that Christmas is a time to eat cakes and this is horrifying to me. Thank you so much for sharing. I enjoyed reading this!
reply by the author on 12-Dec-2017
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Oh beautiful!! Many people around the world forget the true meaning of Christmas. Where I live, people think that Christmas is a time to eat cakes and this is horrifying to me. Thank you so much for sharing. I enjoyed reading this!
Comment Written 12-Dec-2017
reply by the author on 12-Dec-2017
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We have some bizarre things now Horror ar
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Yep, we do have some bizarre things
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I think all cultures do 😊😕
Comment from Gert sherwood
Smiles to you and Thank you Buckelist
for your stacked 5-7-5 message to remind us we are celebrating the birth of Jesus our Lord and Savior.
By any chance die you read my post of the true story --What is Christmas--?
Gert
reply by the author on 12-Dec-2017
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Smiles to you and Thank you Buckelist
for your stacked 5-7-5 message to remind us we are celebrating the birth of Jesus our Lord and Savior.
By any chance die you read my post of the true story --What is Christmas--?
Gert
Comment Written 12-Dec-2017
reply by the author on 12-Dec-2017
i read it after you asked me now. I will review it , but the message is similar. Great minds Gert!i Ithink the lesson has to be taught before peer pressure and designer clothes phase.
Thanks so much for reviewing
Hugs, Trisha
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You are welcome Trisha
To think that you and I had the same thought to write about ,sounds like both of us are meant to get what the true meaning of Christmas at different times I looked to see when I posted my true story it looks like it was December 9, 2017.
Smiles
Gert
Comment from Lee Barnett
Rhythm and rhyme is traditional. I like traditional. The thought you capture is universal and a rather overdone theme, but also very true. I love the image.
reply by the author on 13-Dec-2017
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Rhythm and rhyme is traditional. I like traditional. The thought you capture is universal and a rather overdone theme, but also very true. I love the image.
Comment Written 12-Dec-2017
reply by the author on 13-Dec-2017
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I like the rhyme n rythmn too but Tanka style poetry it?s not usual. I loved the image as well! It would be a good osimple way to teach children about the origin of Christmas. Thank you so much for your review ...
Comment from Mystic Angel 7777
You meet the Tanka form structure perfectly following the 5-7-5-7-7 syllable count. I'm not sure what the exact assignment entailed, but as a rule there is a change in perspective in the second five syllable line (kind of like a volta works in the third stanza of a sonnet) and in this one it seems to re-enforce the overall tone. The closing is very inspiring. Nicely done and thank you very much for sharing it.
reply by the author on 12-Dec-2017
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You meet the Tanka form structure perfectly following the 5-7-5-7-7 syllable count. I'm not sure what the exact assignment entailed, but as a rule there is a change in perspective in the second five syllable line (kind of like a volta works in the third stanza of a sonnet) and in this one it seems to re-enforce the overall tone. The closing is very inspiring. Nicely done and thank you very much for sharing it.
Comment Written 12-Dec-2017
reply by the author on 12-Dec-2017
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Thanks - you were astute. My mistake has been corrected now,. I greatly appreciate your reviews, it?s so nice for you to be back
With us.
Hugs an smiles, Trisha
