Little Mel
Suspense in 200 words is difficult to write.19 total reviews
Comment from royowen
Well done Maria, you managed to create one or two questions, and a very relieved reader to find the baby in the professed non carer of the same, as a father, I don't know how one cannot be interested in one's own child. Well done Maria, good flash fiction story. Blesings, Roy
reply by the author on 07-Dec-2017
Well done Maria, you managed to create one or two questions, and a very relieved reader to find the baby in the professed non carer of the same, as a father, I don't know how one cannot be interested in one's own child. Well done Maria, good flash fiction story. Blesings, Roy
Comment Written 07-Dec-2017
reply by the author on 07-Dec-2017
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Thanks for reading, Roy.
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Most welcome
Comment from Ulla
Hi Maria Jose, this must be any mother's worst nightmare. I think the father should have been arrested. A well written flash for the event. I liked it. All the best. Ulla:)))
reply by the author on 07-Dec-2017
Hi Maria Jose, this must be any mother's worst nightmare. I think the father should have been arrested. A well written flash for the event. I liked it. All the best. Ulla:)))
Comment Written 07-Dec-2017
reply by the author on 07-Dec-2017
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Thanks for reading, Ulla. Looking forward to reading yours.
Comment from damommy
I bet she never leaves the baby alone again. It only takes a few minutes for tragedy to happen in many forms.
Ryan should have been arrested and charged with kidnapping.
reply by the author on 07-Dec-2017
I bet she never leaves the baby alone again. It only takes a few minutes for tragedy to happen in many forms.
Ryan should have been arrested and charged with kidnapping.
Comment Written 07-Dec-2017
reply by the author on 07-Dec-2017
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Thanks for reading, Yvonne. Have a nice day.
Comment from patcelaw
Maria, this is a good flash fiction and had me scratching my head at the end. I had forgotten that Ryan was mentioned in the first lines of the story. Blessings for a good day, Patricia
reply by the author on 07-Dec-2017
Maria, this is a good flash fiction and had me scratching my head at the end. I had forgotten that Ryan was mentioned in the first lines of the story. Blessings for a good day, Patricia
Comment Written 07-Dec-2017
reply by the author on 07-Dec-2017
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Thanks for reading, Patricia.
Comment from Sandra du Plessis
A very well-written story of suspence. It must be a crazy feeling to realize your baby is taken within a few minutes when you were gone to buy more formula while she was sleeping.
reply by the author on 07-Dec-2017
A very well-written story of suspence. It must be a crazy feeling to realize your baby is taken within a few minutes when you were gone to buy more formula while she was sleeping.
Comment Written 07-Dec-2017
reply by the author on 07-Dec-2017
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Thanks for reading, Sandra.
Comment from Dean Kuch
I guess Ryan wanted more to do with Melinda than this single mum thought he did, Maria.
Here in the US, Ryan would have breaking and entering as well as kidnapping charges filed against him.
Not pretty!
Well, you know what they say.
"All's well that ends well."
Nicely done!
~Dean
reply by the author on 07-Dec-2017
I guess Ryan wanted more to do with Melinda than this single mum thought he did, Maria.
Here in the US, Ryan would have breaking and entering as well as kidnapping charges filed against him.
Not pretty!
Well, you know what they say.
"All's well that ends well."
Nicely done!
~Dean
Comment Written 07-Dec-2017
reply by the author on 07-Dec-2017
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Thanks, Dean.
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My pleasure. :)
Comment from Sharon Haiste
I think this is a good story for the Suspense event.
It is not easy to tell a story in 200 words but you have managed quite well.
Well told, well done.
Sharon
reply by the author on 07-Dec-2017
I think this is a good story for the Suspense event.
It is not easy to tell a story in 200 words but you have managed quite well.
Well told, well done.
Sharon
Comment Written 07-Dec-2017
reply by the author on 07-Dec-2017
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Thanks, Sharon.
Comment from Dolly'sPoems
You certainly had me hanging on the edge here! A great suspense write and I really enjoyed your story, only a Mother can know that fear of your child being missing. Love Dolly x
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reply by the author on 07-Dec-2017
You certainly had me hanging on the edge here! A great suspense write and I really enjoyed your story, only a Mother can know that fear of your child being missing. Love Dolly x
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Comment Written 07-Dec-2017
reply by the author on 07-Dec-2017
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Thanks for reading, Dolly.
Comment from DR DIP
Interesting ending So Ryan finally succumbed to the idea of being a father.
Split families with kids involved must be always hard I like your story telling Maria
thanks for sharing
dip
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reply by the author on 07-Dec-2017
Interesting ending So Ryan finally succumbed to the idea of being a father.
Split families with kids involved must be always hard I like your story telling Maria
thanks for sharing
dip
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Comment Written 07-Dec-2017
reply by the author on 07-Dec-2017
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Thanks, Mark. Have a lovely day.