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This Time - That Time 2

Viewing comments for Chapter 24 "Gwendolyn's Despair"
Veronica is sent back again

37 total reviews 
Comment from wordsfromsue
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

My hair had come away from the clips that (had) been placed to hold it neatly within my headdress

For the first time, Gwendolyn's sad face broke into a smile. 'It sounds funny (what year was this? Would 'funny' have been a word in use at that time?) now I can look back on it, but it wasn't at the time.'

Brilliant chapter. So sad though. :-(

Poor Gwendolyn had a sucky life. :-(

I love the mystery and direction of the story, Sandra.


 Comment Written 03-Dec-2017


reply by the author on 03-Dec-2017
    Thank you so much for coming and reading this part, Sue! I'm so pleased you enjoyed it. The word 'funny' was first known to be used in the year 1756. It's like the word: Harping on, that first came out in 1513! I have to research these things, it's quite interesting too. Thanks again, my friend. xxx
Comment from RGstar
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

No, I am not up to scratch, or understand much about the plots and narrative concerning past chapters as missed so much, yet, there are times ...and the knowing of those times come easy for me, when reading a work, it takes but a chapter to cement the value of both writing and narrative.
When one can immerse one's self into a work, even before halfway, because of the quality in writing, one knows that author and the write synchronize wonderfully.

There are but few author's here that can do this, and its a pleasure to read them all...and this is no exception.
Beautiful writing. Easy to identify and feel emotions that govern the thought process of the working mind.
Bravo.
You have my six stars.
One little thing;

" By the time I arrived at the missionary church, I was cold, distressed, and I felt so sick...'"
Do not need "I" three times in succession there. Take the last one away;

."By the time I arrived at the missionary church, I was cold, distressed, and felt so sick...'"

Better without.
Have a great evening.

My best wishes.
RG

 Comment Written 03-Dec-2017


reply by the author on 03-Dec-2017
    Thank you so very much, my friend for your input. On reading how much better it sounded with the third 'I' removed I had to agree with you, it now sounds so much better. Also, your review, RG, it's lovely, how kind you are to give me a 6 stars too. Thank you and a big hug! Sandra xxx
Comment from Ben Colder
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

Excellent descriptive writing. I can see her. 'Yes, I did. I banged on the door as hard as I could, and the inner wooden window opened. All I could see was a pair of elderly eyes staring back at me, and then the man opened the door and looked me up and down. I realised I must look a frightful sight, dressed in a wedding gown that was torn, covered in mud, and soaked through. My hair had come away from the clips that been placed to hold it neatly within my headdress and veil, and the rain had reduced it to limp strands around my shoulders.'

 Comment Written 03-Dec-2017


reply by the author on 03-Dec-2017
    Thank you so much, my dear Ben, for the lovely review and the golden stars! I have posted your signed sticker, hopefully it will get there soon, what with the Christmas posts. I'm so pleased you still enjoy my story, my friend!! Big hugs, and much love. Sandy. xxxx
reply by Ben Colder on 03-Dec-2017
    Tell me again how to find your book on Amazon. I will get it done today.
reply by the author on 03-Dec-2017
    Just go into Amazon.com then type my name in the search bar: Sandra Stoner Mitchell, and my book will come up. This Time - That Time.

    Thank you my dear friend. :) xxxx
reply by Ben Colder on 03-Dec-2017
    I found some of your work , short stories etc. I will now try the other. Thanks Sandy.
reply by the author on 03-Dec-2017
    The short stories were before I joined FS and was shown how bad my writing was, lol. I've learned a lot since those days, and I hope it shows!!
reply by Ben Colder on 03-Dec-2017
    I found it. The book cover fits the story with the clocks and all. I will order a paper back copy for my library. Thank you my dear fellow author friend.
    Hopefully mine will be out something in 18. Editors are visiting shrinks after reading my mess. LOL.
reply by Ben Colder on 03-Dec-2017
    Just bought it.
reply by the author on 03-Dec-2017
    LOL, I loved your book, Ben, and once it's for sale, you must let me know so I can buy my copy. I just loved it. Thank you for getting mine, my friend. I'm glad you liked my cover! xxxx
reply by the author on 03-Dec-2017
    AWW, Bless your heart, my dear Ben! xxxxx
Comment from giraffmang
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

Hi Sandra,

Super addition to the story here. I was sad when she morphed out back to her own time 'No... not now...' lol

It hit him hard when I confessed the truth. 'I was unmarried and pregnant - remove the speech marks here.


 Comment Written 03-Dec-2017


reply by the author on 03-Dec-2017
    You've made my day, G!! Thank you so very much for the lovely 6 stars, coming from you it means a lot. I've removed the speech mark. I've been doing it with the single speech marks instead of the more noticeable double ones, solely because I noticed all the published books I've read are using the single. But it's hard to see them when editing. Thank goodness for people like you who have excellent eyesight!

    Veronica won't be back in her own time for long, she needs to do some research. So, 'She'll be back.' using an Arnold S. catch phrase. LOL. Big hugs, my friend, and another big hug. :) Sandra xxx
Comment from c_lucas
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

The eighteenth century was not for weak women. This is very written with a smooth flow of words, making for a very interesting read. There is very good imagery.

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 Comment Written 03-Dec-2017


reply by the author on 03-Dec-2017
    Thank you so much, Charles. You are so right, I would have hated living that way. Mind you, many cultures still treat women like that. No nice! :) Sandra xxx
Comment from apky
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Such a heart-rending chapter, Sandra.

You did a great job of bringing out Gwendolyn's plight to the reader. Your words and descriptions made me feel with her. I could relate to her plight. Even in the fbulous dialogue, you managed to bring out the emotions really well.


He told me I'd made him look a fool,[as if this was about him!] and who did I think would want to marry me now.[there we go - the age-old plight of women as men's sole ownership chattels]

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 Comment Written 03-Dec-2017


reply by the author on 03-Dec-2017
    That's exactly right, Aki, and women were treated like that and still are in some cultures. Thank you so much, for your lovely review, my friend. Big hugs. :) Sandra xxx
Comment from royowen
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

Such a sad episode dear Sandra. The tangible grief in the character of Lady Gwendolyn is palpable, (good writing). What happened to Jacob is a mystery, but I'm sure you know what's happened. I'm sure you have the story all in hand. This was a typically harrowing episode, Sandra, great reading, and no spags detected, well done. Blessings, Roy

 Comment Written 03-Dec-2017


reply by the author on 03-Dec-2017
    Aw, thank you so very much, Roy! What a lovely review. Thank you for the 6 stars too, that was so kind of you. Veronica has some investigating to do now, with the help of Mildred and James. I hope they find him!! :) Big hugs, my dear friend. :) Sandra xxx
reply by royowen on 03-Dec-2017
    Well earned Sandra