Like a southerly change
That fresh breeze of love15 total reviews
Comment from Sis Cat
Dip, this is a fine poem that used the southerly change as an analogy for love. Love has been by poets compared to many different weather phenomenon. I think of Shakespeare's sonnet "Shall I Compare Thee To A Summer Day?" You use grace, creativity, and passion in your weather analogy.
One part I found awkward when read is "my lips come reach your mouth." The two verbs "cone reach" are odd together. Clearer and smoother would be "my lips reach towards your mouth."
Other than that glitch, this is a fine poem. Thank you for sharing.
reply by the author on 09-Nov-2017
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Dip, this is a fine poem that used the southerly change as an analogy for love. Love has been by poets compared to many different weather phenomenon. I think of Shakespeare's sonnet "Shall I Compare Thee To A Summer Day?" You use grace, creativity, and passion in your weather analogy.
One part I found awkward when read is "my lips come reach your mouth." The two verbs "cone reach" are odd together. Clearer and smoother would be "my lips reach towards your mouth."
Other than that glitch, this is a fine poem. Thank you for sharing.
Comment Written 09-Nov-2017
reply by the author on 09-Nov-2017
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Thankyou so much Andre I will take on board what you say and reassess the line.
Always appreciate your insightful and thoughtful comments
dip
Comment from Teri7
Dip, As always this is a very well written and very nice poem. You used very good descriptive wording and very good imagery with your words. Your comment notes were great too! I enjoyed it my friend! Blessings, Teri
reply by the author on 09-Nov-2017
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Dip, As always this is a very well written and very nice poem. You used very good descriptive wording and very good imagery with your words. Your comment notes were great too! I enjoyed it my friend! Blessings, Teri
Comment Written 09-Nov-2017
reply by the author on 09-Nov-2017
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Thank you so much Teri much appreciated as always.
dip
Comment from Sandra du Plessis
A very well-written poem about the change of a cooler wind from the south on a very hot summer's day. Renew energy when the rain fall and a break from the heat is always welcome.
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reply by the author on 09-Nov-2017
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A very well-written poem about the change of a cooler wind from the south on a very hot summer's day. Renew energy when the rain fall and a break from the heat is always welcome.
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The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 09-Nov-2017
reply by the author on 09-Nov-2017
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Thank you Sandra . You are so right as always
dip
Comment from patcelaw
I live in the desert so when it is a very hot day and the rains come, we are grateful for the refreshing that comes. Many blessings for a wonderful day. Patricia
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reply by the author on 09-Nov-2017
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I live in the desert so when it is a very hot day and the rains come, we are grateful for the refreshing that comes. Many blessings for a wonderful day. Patricia
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Comment Written 09-Nov-2017
reply by the author on 09-Nov-2017
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Thank you so much Pat and I sincerely hope everything works out for you
dip
Comment from Dolly'sPoems
I love your true writes Dip, when you speak from the heart like this your poems are taken to a new level for me, I learned something too! You also liken the changes to a change in your relationship and the love you share with someone, this is superb writing, love Dolly x
reply by the author on 09-Nov-2017
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I love your true writes Dip, when you speak from the heart like this your poems are taken to a new level for me, I learned something too! You also liken the changes to a change in your relationship and the love you share with someone, this is superb writing, love Dolly x
Comment Written 09-Nov-2017
reply by the author on 09-Nov-2017
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Dolly I don't think you realize just how much that compliment means to me and to give a wonderful 6 makes it even more so. You give me the incentive to continue to write when I might lose the impetus to. You make coming to fanstory a pleasure.
thank you as always Dolly never stop coming .
xdip
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You are very kind Dip, thank you, love Dolly x
