Native blue sage
4/6/5 haiku26 total reviews
Comment from Rasmine
Beautiful, Marival. I like the explanation you give for the syllables.
I am so sick of Indian Summer. I want Fall -- I want leaves to crunch -- be able to wear my jeans and not sweat to death -- be able to breathe outside without getting pressure in my head (humidity does that to me, ugh!).
Did you paint your profile picture? If you did, damn, you should join FanArtReview, too.
How are you doing? How is Dean? Thought there would be more scary poems from him then there are, at this time.
Nome
reply by the author on 09-Oct-2017
  |
Beautiful, Marival. I like the explanation you give for the syllables.
I am so sick of Indian Summer. I want Fall -- I want leaves to crunch -- be able to wear my jeans and not sweat to death -- be able to breathe outside without getting pressure in my head (humidity does that to me, ugh!).
Did you paint your profile picture? If you did, damn, you should join FanArtReview, too.
How are you doing? How is Dean? Thought there would be more scary poems from him then there are, at this time.
Nome
Comment Written 09-Oct-2017
reply by the author on 09-Oct-2017
-
Thank you very much for the excellent review and kind words.
Gypsy
Comment from Chrissy710
Hi Gypsy A couple of questions re this Haiku Does Native blue grass only grow in late summer or all throughout summer Or is it specific to an Indian Summer Which we would call if the summer is long and dry more than usual.
I am not sure if using Summer twice was needed ? not sure what your would use but perhaps another Satori line that describes and Indian Summer may be better.
Cheers Christine
reply by the author on 09-Oct-2017
|
Hi Gypsy A couple of questions re this Haiku Does Native blue grass only grow in late summer or all throughout summer Or is it specific to an Indian Summer Which we would call if the summer is long and dry more than usual.
I am not sure if using Summer twice was needed ? not sure what your would use but perhaps another Satori line that describes and Indian Summer may be better.
Cheers Christine
Comment Written 09-Oct-2017
reply by the author on 09-Oct-2017
-
Hello, Chrissy,
Blue sage is a Native American flower that grows in Southern United States from July to October. I changed summer to September so now there is only one summer. I can't believe I missed that. I am still recuperating. Thank you very much for the lovely review. Cheers
Gypsy
Comment from Heather Knight
The best thing about this haiku is the personification of the sage:basks in late summer's sun.
I love sage and all other aromatic plants.
Thanks for sharing your lovely haiku.
reply by the author on 09-Oct-2017
|
The best thing about this haiku is the personification of the sage:basks in late summer's sun.
I love sage and all other aromatic plants.
Thanks for sharing your lovely haiku.
Comment Written 09-Oct-2017
reply by the author on 09-Oct-2017
-
Thank you very much for the excellent review and kind words.
Gypsy
Comment from apky
Hullo Friend,
I've been away last week and still will have little time to review all that I have in my messages box.
So this is my little apology to let you know I'm a bit indisposed at the moment and can't give the kind of comprehensive review I normally do for your chapters and posts. We have a very dear family friend who has been hospitalized and operated on, so I spend most days at the clinic and sorting out business paperwork.
I know it's a fake five stars, more or less. Please accept.
All the best,
Apky
reply by the author on 09-Oct-2017
|
Hullo Friend,
I've been away last week and still will have little time to review all that I have in my messages box.
So this is my little apology to let you know I'm a bit indisposed at the moment and can't give the kind of comprehensive review I normally do for your chapters and posts. We have a very dear family friend who has been hospitalized and operated on, so I spend most days at the clinic and sorting out business paperwork.
I know it's a fake five stars, more or less. Please accept.
All the best,
Apky
Comment Written 09-Oct-2017
reply by the author on 09-Oct-2017
-
Thank you very much for the excellent review and kind words.
Gypsy
Comment from MizKat
Hi Gypsy Blue Rose,
You have written another very nice poem.
I enjoyed reading it and look forward to reading more.
You always share such wonderful work.
Kat
reply by the author on 09-Oct-2017
|
Hi Gypsy Blue Rose,
You have written another very nice poem.
I enjoyed reading it and look forward to reading more.
You always share such wonderful work.
Kat
Comment Written 09-Oct-2017
reply by the author on 09-Oct-2017
-
Thank you very much for the excellent review and kind words.
Gypsy
-
You're very welcome. Kat
Comment from rama devi
I love sage. This is a nice haiku with fine imagery and a good subtle pu on sage (Indian sage, and the plant). Good word economy. However, I think using summer twice weakens it. Suggest finding an alternative in line two. Maybe August? Also, I recommend not capping the first word, native, as haiku does not use caps. Otherwise, this nears a six. Bravo. Lovely presentation.
Warmly, rd
reply by the author on 09-Oct-2017
|
I love sage. This is a nice haiku with fine imagery and a good subtle pu on sage (Indian sage, and the plant). Good word economy. However, I think using summer twice weakens it. Suggest finding an alternative in line two. Maybe August? Also, I recommend not capping the first word, native, as haiku does not use caps. Otherwise, this nears a six. Bravo. Lovely presentation.
Warmly, rd
Comment Written 08-Oct-2017
reply by the author on 09-Oct-2017
-
Thank you very much for the excellent review and valuable feedback. I changed summer to September and changed to lower cap. Thank you! I am still recuperating and my writing is not as good as it used to be. I am trying.
love
Gypsy
-
Thanks for your gracious response, dear. Glad to help. Sending lots of healing vibes your way.
Love and warm hugs,
rd
Comment from BOO ghost
Less syllables compensate with power words. Nice 15 syllables! Like your light azure words. Indian Summer. Brings back the memories... those Indian Summer days with no care in the world and future looks bright. Look into the gypsies crystal ball. The native blue sage of the Blue Ridge mountains, Bodies basking on the beach in the sun. We are - the children of the sun. Splendid poem,my dear lady. BOO-tastic! I come once per week with a fistful of gold.
reply by the author on 09-Oct-2017
 |
Less syllables compensate with power words. Nice 15 syllables! Like your light azure words. Indian Summer. Brings back the memories... those Indian Summer days with no care in the world and future looks bright. Look into the gypsies crystal ball. The native blue sage of the Blue Ridge mountains, Bodies basking on the beach in the sun. We are - the children of the sun. Splendid poem,my dear lady. BOO-tastic! I come once per week with a fistful of gold.
Comment Written 08-Oct-2017
reply by the author on 09-Oct-2017
-
Thank you for the exceptional review and six stars, Boo, you are awesome.
Gypsy hugs
-
BOO comes once a week with his nuggets. Hope you doing OK, sweetie pie. he - he.
-
Take care of Spooky. When is the white wedding? Cheers.
-
LoL no wedding. I do what I can but I am too far.
-
Yep, heard that Spooky has to have gall bladder removed. I hope he will be OK.
Comment from kiwigirl2821
Hi Sister. I love this one. The smell of that sage is incredible too. Have you ever smelled it? Presentation is wonderful and the words make me long for home. xoxo d
reply by the author on 09-Oct-2017
|
Hi Sister. I love this one. The smell of that sage is incredible too. Have you ever smelled it? Presentation is wonderful and the words make me long for home. xoxo d
Comment Written 08-Oct-2017
reply by the author on 09-Oct-2017
-
Thank you very much for the excellent review and kind words, sister.
Gypsy
Comment from Mustang Patty
Hi, Gypsy;
thank you for sharing more information about the Haiku. Your simple little poem follows the described syllable count and contains a wonderful message of Indian Summer. The artwork chosen complimented the piece well.
~patty~
reply by the author on 09-Oct-2017
|
Hi, Gypsy;
thank you for sharing more information about the Haiku. Your simple little poem follows the described syllable count and contains a wonderful message of Indian Summer. The artwork chosen complimented the piece well.
~patty~
Comment Written 08-Oct-2017
reply by the author on 09-Oct-2017
-
Thank you very much for the excellent review and kind words, Patty.
Gypsy
Comment from Father Flaps
Hi Gypsy
I enjoyed your haiku about the blue sage plant. We went for a walk late yesterday afternoon, down the Spruce Lake Trail, and found a plant I've never seen before. It had beautiful small bluish flowers on it, but it looked somewhat like an evergreen bush. I looked for it, but the only thing I saw that was remotely close was a blue sage.
I've noticed during the past few years that most of autumn's wild blooms are either purple or yellow. We haven't really had many cold days yet, but they are coming... a little late is okay with me. My power bill was only $125 for the month of September, and I can live with that! Last winter, my highest bill was almost $400!
I like to see haiku poetry with less than 17 syllables. A lot of people think that 5-7-5 is the only way to go... wrong! I count 4-6-5 syllables for your poem, which includes alliteration (summer's sun) and a hint of personification of the blue sage... (arguably not).
I wonder why they call it "Indian Summer". Could it be that North American Indians would put off moving to their winter camp until after fall's warm spell? I don't know, but I like that idea.
Nicely penned! Thanks for sharing.
cheers
Kimbob
reply by the author on 09-Oct-2017
|
Hi Gypsy
I enjoyed your haiku about the blue sage plant. We went for a walk late yesterday afternoon, down the Spruce Lake Trail, and found a plant I've never seen before. It had beautiful small bluish flowers on it, but it looked somewhat like an evergreen bush. I looked for it, but the only thing I saw that was remotely close was a blue sage.
I've noticed during the past few years that most of autumn's wild blooms are either purple or yellow. We haven't really had many cold days yet, but they are coming... a little late is okay with me. My power bill was only $125 for the month of September, and I can live with that! Last winter, my highest bill was almost $400!
I like to see haiku poetry with less than 17 syllables. A lot of people think that 5-7-5 is the only way to go... wrong! I count 4-6-5 syllables for your poem, which includes alliteration (summer's sun) and a hint of personification of the blue sage... (arguably not).
I wonder why they call it "Indian Summer". Could it be that North American Indians would put off moving to their winter camp until after fall's warm spell? I don't know, but I like that idea.
Nicely penned! Thanks for sharing.
cheers
Kimbob
Comment Written 08-Oct-2017
reply by the author on 09-Oct-2017
-
Thank you very much for the excellent review and kind words, Kimbob.
Gypsy
-
I found a picture of a plant that's quite similar to the one we found on the trail. It's called a Purple Milk Vetch, and it's poisonous!
