Old Glory
Forever shall she fly40 total reviews
Comment from Bob Stanton
Nice work. Not being in or from the USA I see you guys have many problems to contend with and have a certain attitude towards the rest of the world which is not always admired BUT the one thing you can not be faulted on is your exceptionally strong patriotism.
"Old Glory" symbolises this and you have done it proud.
reply by the author on 16-Oct-2017
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Nice work. Not being in or from the USA I see you guys have many problems to contend with and have a certain attitude towards the rest of the world which is not always admired BUT the one thing you can not be faulted on is your exceptionally strong patriotism.
"Old Glory" symbolises this and you have done it proud.
Comment Written 16-Oct-2017
reply by the author on 16-Oct-2017
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Thank you so much for the wonderful review, Bob! It was certainly written in honor of the freedom that our country's flag stands for and the struggles, even within itself, that she's endured. Thank you again for a wonderful review - and have a beautiful day!
Comment from giraffmang
Hi there,
You seem to have the sonnet down well here as far as this uneducated ear can tell.
I have to admit to not understanding the whole flag thing. I'm not American and pledge no allegiance to any flag. Things like this I feel create divisions in the human race rather than bring them together.
All the best in the competition.
GMG
reply by the author on 16-Oct-2017
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Hi there,
You seem to have the sonnet down well here as far as this uneducated ear can tell.
I have to admit to not understanding the whole flag thing. I'm not American and pledge no allegiance to any flag. Things like this I feel create divisions in the human race rather than bring them together.
All the best in the competition.
GMG
Comment Written 16-Oct-2017
reply by the author on 16-Oct-2017
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Thank you so much for the 5 star review! Definitely written with no political meaning here, just a deep pride for our flag and the struggles she's endured in the name of Freedom for all in our country! Thank you again for your review of my sonnet! Have a wonderful day!
Comment from Michael Ludwinder
Very nice. I really enjoy the patriotic message in your poem. There isn't a political message but rather just a pride in the flag and therefore the country as a whole. Your poem is well written with natural word selection. A joy to read.
reply by the author on 16-Oct-2017
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Very nice. I really enjoy the patriotic message in your poem. There isn't a political message but rather just a pride in the flag and therefore the country as a whole. Your poem is well written with natural word selection. A joy to read.
Comment Written 16-Oct-2017
reply by the author on 16-Oct-2017
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Thank you so very much! That was definitely my intention - certainly no political message, but certainly much pride in our flag and the freedom that she stands for! Thank you again for the wonderful review and 5 stars! So happy that you enjoyed! Have a beautiful day!
Comment from Oatmeal
MIMI LINNY,
You did a wonderful job with the challenge that was presented to you. Thoughts are expressed and described well. The flow was very nice. The theme was good. The artwork complemented your poem.
There was no SPAG. No typos. No homophones. No problems at all.
I look forward to seeing you again.
Love you,
Oatmeal
reply by the author on 15-Oct-2017
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MIMI LINNY,
You did a wonderful job with the challenge that was presented to you. Thoughts are expressed and described well. The flow was very nice. The theme was good. The artwork complemented your poem.
There was no SPAG. No typos. No homophones. No problems at all.
I look forward to seeing you again.
Love you,
Oatmeal
Comment Written 15-Oct-2017
reply by the author on 15-Oct-2017
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Thank you so much for your review and wonderful comments! I am so happy that you enjoyed "Old Glory!" Have a grand day!
Comment from evesayshi
In my opinion, a striking tribute to our flag - while dramatic and patriotic in delivery, the rhyming is uneven, requiring attention in this regard. I have not tackled the sonnet myself and cannot imagine the difficulty, but reading this work aloud several times will correct this, either by changing, adding or deleting words, for example, with your permission:
1. 1st stanza - 1st line - delete words "she stands,"
2. 1st stanza - 2nd line - delete word "amidst,"
3. 1st stanza - 3rd line - delete words "of those,"
4. 1st stanza - 4th line - change word "shrouded" to "hidden," or
another smoother sounding word for more fluid movement...
reply by the author on 15-Oct-2017
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In my opinion, a striking tribute to our flag - while dramatic and patriotic in delivery, the rhyming is uneven, requiring attention in this regard. I have not tackled the sonnet myself and cannot imagine the difficulty, but reading this work aloud several times will correct this, either by changing, adding or deleting words, for example, with your permission:
1. 1st stanza - 1st line - delete words "she stands,"
2. 1st stanza - 2nd line - delete word "amidst,"
3. 1st stanza - 3rd line - delete words "of those,"
4. 1st stanza - 4th line - change word "shrouded" to "hidden," or
another smoother sounding word for more fluid movement...
Comment Written 15-Oct-2017
reply by the author on 15-Oct-2017
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Thank you so much for the 5 star review! Am so happy that you enjoyed! Have a wonderful evening!
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You are very welcome indeed, Mimi - my pleasure - have a nice evening as well and an outstanding week...Eve
Comment from papa55mike
It's amazing the protests that have been tied to our Nation's symbol. Our flag should be a beacon of freedom, but it has been distorted in so many ways. If you want to protest, fine, but leave the Flag and Anthem alone. Your beautifully written poem brings out that point. Great job! I wish I had a six for you.
Good luck in the contest!
Have a great day and God bless.
mike
reply by the author on 15-Oct-2017
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It's amazing the protests that have been tied to our Nation's symbol. Our flag should be a beacon of freedom, but it has been distorted in so many ways. If you want to protest, fine, but leave the Flag and Anthem alone. Your beautifully written poem brings out that point. Great job! I wish I had a six for you.
Good luck in the contest!
Have a great day and God bless.
mike
Comment Written 15-Oct-2017
reply by the author on 15-Oct-2017
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Thank you, Mike! I greatly appreciate the wonderful review and comments! I am so happy that you enjoyed this piece! Have a beautiful day!
Comment from Pantygynt
Let us hope that those in charge wave the flag with as much honour as these high-sounding syllables urge. Personally I find little wrong with inverted syntax such as you have in your penultimate line, but there are many who are not keen on it.
The only real criticism I have of this as a Shakespearean sonnet is that it develops but a single point of view rather than presenting an alternative argument in the third quatrain. This volta is almost a defining feature of the form and I am not sure that your "though" that opens the third quatrain is quite strong enough to qualify, but that is just a matter of opinion.
Your metre and rhyme scheme here are 100%.
reply by the author on 15-Oct-2017
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Let us hope that those in charge wave the flag with as much honour as these high-sounding syllables urge. Personally I find little wrong with inverted syntax such as you have in your penultimate line, but there are many who are not keen on it.
The only real criticism I have of this as a Shakespearean sonnet is that it develops but a single point of view rather than presenting an alternative argument in the third quatrain. This volta is almost a defining feature of the form and I am not sure that your "though" that opens the third quatrain is quite strong enough to qualify, but that is just a matter of opinion.
Your metre and rhyme scheme here are 100%.
Comment Written 15-Oct-2017
reply by the author on 15-Oct-2017
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Thank you so much for the wonderful review! This is my first sonnet, so I greatly appreciate your comments on its Shakespearean style. I am so happy that you enjoyed! Have a wonderful day!
Comment from Dolly'sPoems
A great sonnet in tribute to the Stars and Stripes American flag. Your sonnet flows well with a great rhyming scheme and wonderful warm sentiments, love Dolly x
reply by the author on 15-Oct-2017
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A great sonnet in tribute to the Stars and Stripes American flag. Your sonnet flows well with a great rhyming scheme and wonderful warm sentiments, love Dolly x
Comment Written 15-Oct-2017
reply by the author on 15-Oct-2017
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Thanks so much for the great review, Dolly! I'm so glad that you enjoyed! Have a wonderful day!
Comment from Juliette Chamberlain
I love how you have chosen the flag to represent some of the issues America currently faces, not actually outlined but inherent in the poem itself. Personified beautifully, and much admired by a British friend.
Warmly,
Juliette
reply by the author on 15-Oct-2017
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I love how you have chosen the flag to represent some of the issues America currently faces, not actually outlined but inherent in the poem itself. Personified beautifully, and much admired by a British friend.
Warmly,
Juliette
Comment Written 15-Oct-2017
reply by the author on 15-Oct-2017
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Thank you so much for the wonderful review, my British friend! I am so happy that it's one that you enjoyed! Recently had my DNA profile completed and found out that I'm part British, too! Thank you again for the grand review! Have a beautiful day!
Comment from Boogienights
Great poem, I really liked it. It's so important that we all honor our flag, especially during these troubled times when Americans are so divided politically and racially. Wonderful use of rhyme, thanks for sharing.
reply by the author on 14-Oct-2017
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Great poem, I really liked it. It's so important that we all honor our flag, especially during these troubled times when Americans are so divided politically and racially. Wonderful use of rhyme, thanks for sharing.
Comment Written 14-Oct-2017
reply by the author on 14-Oct-2017
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Thanks so much for your review and wonderful comments! So agreed... We are in some sad times right now and so many don't realize that if it wasn't for the sacrifices made for the love of our country, the freedoms we have now would not exist... thank you again for the 5 star review - am so glad you enjoyed my sonnet!
