United VS Disunited
United we stand and divided we fall.62 total reviews
Comment from robina1978
I liked the photo much, and it complements your poem very well. It is an utmost up-to-date subject that you refer to in your poem. As it is for a contest, I'd suggest making it somewhat longer. Good ABAB rhyme. Best wishes.
reply by the author on 05-Oct-2017
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I liked the photo much, and it complements your poem very well. It is an utmost up-to-date subject that you refer to in your poem. As it is for a contest, I'd suggest making it somewhat longer. Good ABAB rhyme. Best wishes.
Comment Written 03-Oct-2017
reply by the author on 05-Oct-2017
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Thank you very much for your so lovely words and Best Wishes. I'm extremely sorry for the delay caused by my sudden illness.
~ RP
Comment from Janet Foor
United we stand and divided we fall is an excellent commentary. I do wish our nation could be united. I think it would go a long way in solving some of our problems.
Your last stanza says a great deal. We live in perilous times with a crazy rouge reeking havoc for the whole world.
Well done.
Blessings
Janet
reply by the author on 05-Oct-2017
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United we stand and divided we fall is an excellent commentary. I do wish our nation could be united. I think it would go a long way in solving some of our problems.
Your last stanza says a great deal. We live in perilous times with a crazy rouge reeking havoc for the whole world.
Well done.
Blessings
Janet
Comment Written 03-Oct-2017
reply by the author on 05-Oct-2017
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Thank you very much for your so lovely words and Blessings. I'm extremely sorry for the delay caused by my sudden illness.
~ RP
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No problem. Hope you are feeling better.
Janet
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Hi Janet,
Thanks. I'm almost quite well. Nothing serious. Such fluctuations are a part of life.
Have a pleasant weekend,
~ RP
Comment from Dean Kuch
What you've written here is so very true, RPSaxena.
North Korea's Chancellor, Kim Jong-un, is neither mature enough nor (more importantly) sane enough to have a nuclear arsenal at his disposal.
Yours is a very well composed entry for the ABAB Poetry contest. It also features an important and very pertinent message.
reply by the author on 05-Oct-2017
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What you've written here is so very true, RPSaxena.
North Korea's Chancellor, Kim Jong-un, is neither mature enough nor (more importantly) sane enough to have a nuclear arsenal at his disposal.
Yours is a very well composed entry for the ABAB Poetry contest. It also features an important and very pertinent message.
Comment Written 03-Oct-2017
reply by the author on 05-Oct-2017
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Dear Dean,
Thank you very much for your so lovely words and Best Wishes. I'm extremely sorry for the delay caused by my sudden illness.
~ RP
Comment from Rasmine
Good poem. I like the meter and especially the rhyming. My favorite stanza is the last one. It says a lot. Thank you, for sharing it.
Good luck in the contest.
reply by the author on 05-Oct-2017
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Good poem. I like the meter and especially the rhyming. My favorite stanza is the last one. It says a lot. Thank you, for sharing it.
Good luck in the contest.
Comment Written 03-Oct-2017
reply by the author on 05-Oct-2017
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Thank you very much for your so lovely words and Good Luck Wishes. I'm extremely sorry for the delay caused by my sudden illness.
~ RP
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I hope you are feeling better!
Comment from dragonpoet
A nuclear bomb launched by one country would cause one to be sent by another and then there would be no movement upward, outward or downward. There are too many despots in this world today. Also, too many general people who turn to violence as their answer. As seen in Las Vegas and so on.
Good luck in the contest.
Keep writing
dragonpoet
reply by the author on 05-Oct-2017
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A nuclear bomb launched by one country would cause one to be sent by another and then there would be no movement upward, outward or downward. There are too many despots in this world today. Also, too many general people who turn to violence as their answer. As seen in Las Vegas and so on.
Good luck in the contest.
Keep writing
dragonpoet
Comment Written 03-Oct-2017
reply by the author on 05-Oct-2017
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Thank you very much for your so lovely words and Good Luck Wishes. I'm extremely sorry for the delay caused by my sudden illness.
~ RP
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Don't mention it. Glad you are feeling better.
dp
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Thanks, dp. I'm almost quite well now.
Nothing serious. Such fluctuations are a part of life.
Have a pleasant weekend!
~ RP
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Good to hear it. Enjoy yours too.
dp
Comment from rjuselius
This is a fine piece of political poetry dear rpsaxena! It's a hard thing to handle but you did it with finesse. Bravo my friend!
Thanks for sharing!
Blessings and a big squeeze!
Rebekka x
reply by the author on 05-Oct-2017
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This is a fine piece of political poetry dear rpsaxena! It's a hard thing to handle but you did it with finesse. Bravo my friend!
Thanks for sharing!
Blessings and a big squeeze!
Rebekka x
Comment Written 03-Oct-2017
reply by the author on 05-Oct-2017
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Hello Rjuselius,
Thank you very much for your so lovely words and Blessings. I'm extremely sorry for the delay caused by my sudden illness.
~ RP
Comment from Daniel Silverhawk
It is true that any talk of war automatically includes concerns of nuclear bombs being sent our way. I don't know if every country in the world shares this fear, but we are taught that there are a lot of crazy rogues out there breathing threats and hiding behind their nukes.
This poem seemed unfinished to me. I thought you could have said more about the United in upward growth compared to the downward plunge all around us.
I also thought you could have given more definitions on what you meant by fine-tuning all the hues.
Though it seemed more could be added, it is short enough to read several times, which I did, in order to grasp the meaning behind each verse.
Thanks for sharing your work
reply by the author on 05-Oct-2017
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It is true that any talk of war automatically includes concerns of nuclear bombs being sent our way. I don't know if every country in the world shares this fear, but we are taught that there are a lot of crazy rogues out there breathing threats and hiding behind their nukes.
This poem seemed unfinished to me. I thought you could have said more about the United in upward growth compared to the downward plunge all around us.
I also thought you could have given more definitions on what you meant by fine-tuning all the hues.
Though it seemed more could be added, it is short enough to read several times, which I did, in order to grasp the meaning behind each verse.
Thanks for sharing your work
Comment Written 03-Oct-2017
reply by the author on 05-Oct-2017
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Thank you very much for your so lovely words and worth following suggestions. I'm extremely sorry for the delay caused by my sudden illness.
~ RP
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Hope you feel better soon
Comment from Oatmeal
RPSAXENA,
The arrangement is understandable. Chosen explanations are made very clear and descriptive. Comprehensible and very well written. Your poem flows nicely. I guess that I wanted to tell you that if two words rhyme and then you add an S to one of them then they no longer rhyme. This means that some of your lines do not rhyme. I am very sorry.
Today our world is like a small (group)
Expressing lots of diverse views;
But even then, without using (troops)
We have to fine-tune all the hues.
It doesn't really matter to me, you can have it any way you want it.
Everything else looks good.
I look forward to seeing you again.
Love you,
Oatmeal
reply by the author on 05-Oct-2017
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RPSAXENA,
The arrangement is understandable. Chosen explanations are made very clear and descriptive. Comprehensible and very well written. Your poem flows nicely. I guess that I wanted to tell you that if two words rhyme and then you add an S to one of them then they no longer rhyme. This means that some of your lines do not rhyme. I am very sorry.
Today our world is like a small (group)
Expressing lots of diverse views;
But even then, without using (troops)
We have to fine-tune all the hues.
It doesn't really matter to me, you can have it any way you want it.
Everything else looks good.
I look forward to seeing you again.
Love you,
Oatmeal
Comment Written 02-Oct-2017
reply by the author on 05-Oct-2017
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Hello Oatmeal,
Thank you very much for your so nice words and worth following suggestions. I'm extremely sorry for the delay caused by my sudden illness.
~ RP
Comment from kiwigirl2821
Hi RP. This one is done in perfect format and you discuss what we are all afraid of. Trump and North Korea's hand on the red button. It would be so delightful if we could take some time, in fact a lot of time and talk of peace not killing multiple people and nations. Good luck. xoxo Kiwi
reply by the author on 05-Oct-2017
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Hi RP. This one is done in perfect format and you discuss what we are all afraid of. Trump and North Korea's hand on the red button. It would be so delightful if we could take some time, in fact a lot of time and talk of peace not killing multiple people and nations. Good luck. xoxo Kiwi
Comment Written 02-Oct-2017
reply by the author on 05-Oct-2017
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Hello Kiwi,
Thank you very much for your so lovely words and Good Luck Wishes. I'm extremely sorry for the delay caused by my sudden illness.
~ RP
Comment from Alcreator Litt Dear
This speaks poet finds today's world is full of controversies, diverse views and threats of peaceful living, all nations are towards making nuclear bombs, now we need united for a peaceful living; I liked.
reply by the author on 05-Oct-2017
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This speaks poet finds today's world is full of controversies, diverse views and threats of peaceful living, all nations are towards making nuclear bombs, now we need united for a peaceful living; I liked.
Comment Written 02-Oct-2017
reply by the author on 05-Oct-2017
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Hello Alcreator Litt Dear,
After a long time!
Thank you very much for your so lovely words. I'm extremely sorry for the delay caused by my sudden illness.
~ RP
