Broken-Hearted Bar Boy Blues
free verse57 total reviews
Comment from Liberty Justice
SIX STARS. Exceptional 6 stars****** for a beautifully designed font and background with variety of colors. Seems lonely heart broken woman is drowning her sorrow with liquor as she uses personification and metaphors to glorify these tears and loneliness. Such classy eloquent descriptions. Good luck contest I just viewed and you have someone's thumbs up. lol liberty justice
  |
SIX STARS. Exceptional 6 stars****** for a beautifully designed font and background with variety of colors. Seems lonely heart broken woman is drowning her sorrow with liquor as she uses personification and metaphors to glorify these tears and loneliness. Such classy eloquent descriptions. Good luck contest I just viewed and you have someone's thumbs up. lol liberty justice
Comment Written 29-Oct-2017
Comment from Asem.inspirations
Oh okay, so here you are, Michael. Your poem is very interesting, very well laid out. You took me to that atmosphere, in that bar where you were. I love the total lay out of the post, the photo, the colors you chose the different letter styles and fonts. It is a very creative piece. The poetry is strong. I am very impressed. I guess a little later on I will revisit your portfolio to check out more of your poetry. Your ranking is also impressive and so I will see the great Michael Cahill's other great works. See you soon.
|
Oh okay, so here you are, Michael. Your poem is very interesting, very well laid out. You took me to that atmosphere, in that bar where you were. I love the total lay out of the post, the photo, the colors you chose the different letter styles and fonts. It is a very creative piece. The poetry is strong. I am very impressed. I guess a little later on I will revisit your portfolio to check out more of your poetry. Your ranking is also impressive and so I will see the great Michael Cahill's other great works. See you soon.
Comment Written 29-Oct-2017
Comment from kathleenspalding
Revenge is best when drunk and misguided - bwahaha! Great poem captured the whole scene so well. I really enjoyed it. Excellent visual presentation.
|
Revenge is best when drunk and misguided - bwahaha! Great poem captured the whole scene so well. I really enjoyed it. Excellent visual presentation.
Comment Written 29-Oct-2017
Comment from ~Dovey
Hi Mikey,
This is an awesome outpouring of emotions in differing perspectives. I love the imagery these lines conjecture - my favorite stanza:
barstool
is a precarious throne
and many a King
has overestimated
the pomp of his circumstance
Good luck in the contest!
Kim
reply by the author on 26-Oct-2017
 |
Hi Mikey,
This is an awesome outpouring of emotions in differing perspectives. I love the imagery these lines conjecture - my favorite stanza:
barstool
is a precarious throne
and many a King
has overestimated
the pomp of his circumstance
Good luck in the contest!
Kim
Comment Written 12-Oct-2017
reply by the author on 26-Oct-2017
-
Hi, Kim
So sorry to be absurdly late with this. But that's better than I often do I guess. LOL
I'm so thrilled you enjoyed this and was two weeks ago too....
I love what you singled out, I liked that a bit too. :))
Thanks so much. mike
Comment from R.A.Partin
It took me a minute to figure out why the line spacing was so weird. Then I realized that the speaker is in a bar. He's supposed to be drunk and that is reflected in the format. That is a very clever use of format. Good job.
reply by the author on 06-Oct-2017
|
It took me a minute to figure out why the line spacing was so weird. Then I realized that the speaker is in a bar. He's supposed to be drunk and that is reflected in the format. That is a very clever use of format. Good job.
Comment Written 03-Oct-2017
reply by the author on 06-Oct-2017
-
Glad you enjoyed. It's something many free verse poets do. Not so much here at Fanstory though. Sometimes it's a distraction, but you're correct, the spacing is designed to draw the eye and break up the words in a specific way. Thanks a million. mike
Comment from frierajac
Thanks a lot for shine on harvest moon, I wonder if Emily has veer heard it or played it? You give the impression that you are in a king's cellar with a lot of other
warm bodies around as you are commiserating with yourself. Good Luck
reply by the author on 06-Oct-2017
|
Thanks a lot for shine on harvest moon, I wonder if Emily has veer heard it or played it? You give the impression that you are in a king's cellar with a lot of other
warm bodies around as you are commiserating with yourself. Good Luck
Comment Written 03-Oct-2017
reply by the author on 06-Oct-2017
-
Yeah, warm bodies are good for atmosphere, but one can still be rather lonely nonetheless. Thanks for your always great insights and thoughts. mike
Comment from Dean Kuch
"I find a table
for this is serious
revenge is best
when drunk
and misguided" ... These were some of my favorite lines in a scathing poetic tirade filled with exceptional lines, Mike. Love, lust...and everything that lies between... will eat us alive from the inside out if we allow them to.
But there are some of us who cannot help but wear our hearts on our sleeves.
Especially poets!
Excellent writing, Mike.
reply by the author on 06-Oct-2017
|
"I find a table
for this is serious
revenge is best
when drunk
and misguided" ... These were some of my favorite lines in a scathing poetic tirade filled with exceptional lines, Mike. Love, lust...and everything that lies between... will eat us alive from the inside out if we allow them to.
But there are some of us who cannot help but wear our hearts on our sleeves.
Especially poets!
Excellent writing, Mike.
Comment Written 03-Oct-2017
reply by the author on 06-Oct-2017
-
Hey, thanks, Dean. I liked those lines too. Glad you liked this one. I thought I'd actually leave my room and see if writing in the real world would add anything. Not sure, but it was fun. LOL mike
Comment from robyn corum
Ouch...
Looks like you weren't the only lonely soul in the bar that night, eh? So you found another lonely, miserable, suffering soul there, too? And what stopped you from hooking up and 'showing them what they were missing out on'?
Me thinks perhaps you came home to write a poem -- is that the better choice? Well, I do think it's one you wouldn't later regret. *smile*
A wonderful piece, Mikey. Full of truths and half-truths and other thoughtful ponderings. Many of us have probably been in those sand-filled shoes, sitting with that heart on the table, building that tower of shot glasses, listening to that ice cube chorus. This was quite delicious. Thank you!
reply by the author on 06-Oct-2017
|
Ouch...
Looks like you weren't the only lonely soul in the bar that night, eh? So you found another lonely, miserable, suffering soul there, too? And what stopped you from hooking up and 'showing them what they were missing out on'?
Me thinks perhaps you came home to write a poem -- is that the better choice? Well, I do think it's one you wouldn't later regret. *smile*
A wonderful piece, Mikey. Full of truths and half-truths and other thoughtful ponderings. Many of us have probably been in those sand-filled shoes, sitting with that heart on the table, building that tower of shot glasses, listening to that ice cube chorus. This was quite delicious. Thank you!
Comment Written 03-Oct-2017
reply by the author on 06-Oct-2017
-
What stopped me? True love. LOL Isn't that just SAD??????
I'm so pleased you enjoyed this. This IS my true style ya know. You perceive everything so perfectly. I swear you are the only one who understands me on Earth. HA! mike
Comment from Jannypan (Jan)
Michael,
This is a well presented contest entry. I like the different colors on the black background. You expressed your thoughts well. The notes are a give away as to what happened. Thanks for sharing. Best wishes in the contest. Jan
reply by the author on 06-Oct-2017
|
Michael,
This is a well presented contest entry. I like the different colors on the black background. You expressed your thoughts well. The notes are a give away as to what happened. Thanks for sharing. Best wishes in the contest. Jan
Comment Written 03-Oct-2017
reply by the author on 06-Oct-2017
-
Hi, Jan
I'm trying to be a good boy and answer ALL my reviews now. Next comes reviewing. Thanks so much. mike
Don't forget stirring the forum pot.
-
Yep. Well, I'm hungry. :))
Comment from krys123
Cheers Mikey;
-a very refreshing type of a mental dialogue of a free verse poem where a man thinks openly as he sits on a barstool in a bar pondering a relationship with a woman with hair as black as night.
-The wording of this poem flows smoothly as the enjambment is not interrupted throughout the writing of any syntax or grammatical errors. The intensity of this enjambment brings to mind many a thoughts a person has wealth sitting in a bar downing their drinks.
-The sadness solitude of the person at this bar recollects his intentions as he ponders the many attributes of why a bar is a refuge for those needing solace.
-The presentation is superb and the imagery is demonstratively descriptive as well as very definitively and vividly expressive.
-I really enjoyed reading this Mikey, and good luck in the contest and take care and have a good one.
Alex
reply by the author on 06-Oct-2017
|
Cheers Mikey;
-a very refreshing type of a mental dialogue of a free verse poem where a man thinks openly as he sits on a barstool in a bar pondering a relationship with a woman with hair as black as night.
-The wording of this poem flows smoothly as the enjambment is not interrupted throughout the writing of any syntax or grammatical errors. The intensity of this enjambment brings to mind many a thoughts a person has wealth sitting in a bar downing their drinks.
-The sadness solitude of the person at this bar recollects his intentions as he ponders the many attributes of why a bar is a refuge for those needing solace.
-The presentation is superb and the imagery is demonstratively descriptive as well as very definitively and vividly expressive.
-I really enjoyed reading this Mikey, and good luck in the contest and take care and have a good one.
Alex
Comment Written 03-Oct-2017
reply by the author on 06-Oct-2017
-
Hi, Alex
Great to hear from you. An always detailed and insightful review. I haven't been around much. I sure missed reviews like this.
Thanks a million. mike
-
You are very welcome Mike.
Alex
