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Viewing comments for Chapter 69 "Caterpillar World 1"
Animal poetry and short stories

11 total reviews 
Comment from Mitchell Brontė
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This was a wonderful Nonet Bill, peddling past pointless pests was a cracking line but my favourite...reinventing what it is to survive...
Great stuff
Mitchell

 Comment Written 20-Sep-2017


reply by the author on 20-Sep-2017
    Thank you, Mitchell, for the positive review. Bill
Comment from nomi338
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Oh that it were possible for me to chill for a few days and emerge a hunk that all the babes wanted to get next to. Unfortunately I am doomed to be as ugly as I have always been. Worse, as I age I become even less attractive. Expanding waistline and decreasing hairline equals disgusting old fart. Yeah, that's me.

 Comment Written 20-Sep-2017


reply by the author on 20-Sep-2017
    Did I write this? Sounds like me.
reply by nomi338 on 21-Sep-2017
    I fear old buddy that you and I are cut from the same cloth.
Comment from damommy
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A great acrostic. Is this also a nonet?

Great descriptions of a caterpillar. I especially like 'rippling like a wave.' That's exactly what they look like, but I would never have thought of that expression.

It reinvents itself so it can live on as a butterfly.

 Comment Written 19-Sep-2017


reply by the author on 19-Sep-2017
    It's a nonet with a couplet of ten-syllables because the word caterpillar has eleven letters.
reply by damommy on 19-Sep-2017
    Very good. 8-)
Comment from Gert sherwood
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Very good Bill of how you spelled out the word Caterpillar
after you catch it in the casing itself in cocoon

As my daughter does to teach her day care children
places the cocoon in a jar and waits for a beautiful butter fly

Gert



 Comment Written 19-Sep-2017


reply by the author on 19-Sep-2017
    Thanks, Gert, for giving this a look. Bill
reply by Gert sherwood on 19-Sep-2017
    You are so welcome Bill
    Gert
Comment from Possummagic
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We've gone from skunks to Caterpillars! Now one would thing there's a limited amount that can be said about a caterpillar but they are wrong, and you are about to show us all everything there is to know about Caterpillars. I look forward to it! Well written. PM

 Comment Written 19-Sep-2017


reply by the author on 19-Sep-2017
    Thanks, PM
reply by Possummagic on 19-Sep-2017
    You're welcome.PM
Comment from kiwigirl2821
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Hi Bill. Love the acrostic form of writing. You have captured perfectly the caterpillar! in all her splendor. It should be interesting as to what is coming next. xx deborah

 Comment Written 19-Sep-2017


reply by the author on 19-Sep-2017
    Thanks, Deborah
Comment from Gloria ....
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This is most cool, Bill. I even got my Nintendo face on reading it, and that means I am paying close attention. You captured the caterpillar perfectly and the poem even looks like a cocoon.

Thanks for sharing my friend.

Gloria

 Comment Written 19-Sep-2017


reply by the author on 19-Sep-2017
    Thank you, Gloria, for the neat review. Bill
Comment from Thomas Bowling
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VEry good. I'm surprised there isn't a contest for this. When I was a kid my father was concerned about his crops. He offered a penny for each caterpillar I brought him. I found a nest of caterpillars and brought to him. I made out like a bandit.

 Comment Written 19-Sep-2017


reply by the author on 19-Sep-2017
    Thanks, Thomas, for the excellent review. No one ever made me that offer or there would a scarcity of butterflies.
Comment from rama devi
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How clever to make the nonet an acrostic too! Superb imagery, tone and phonetics read aloud. Loved the C-K sounds counterpointed with the gentler P, S and L sounds--all in abundance and deftly woven in. Superb!

Favorite lines to read aloud--fluid flow...

Rippling like a wave
Peddling past pointless pests
In search of a resting place
Letting nature find fulfillment


Perfect closing note:

All silent inside a woven chamber
Reinventing what it is to survive


Enjoyed this,

Nice presentation too.



Warmly, rd

 Comment Written 18-Sep-2017


reply by the author on 19-Sep-2017
    Thank you, rd, for the thorough and kind review. Bill
reply by rama devi on 19-Sep-2017
    :-))
Comment from Jannypan (Jan)
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Bill,

This is a great presentation--the picture is perfect, the bold first letter of each line, the alliteration of 'p', & the message.

It is a wonder that something as ugly as this can turn into something beautiful.

Good job & thanks for sharing. Jan

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 Comment Written 18-Sep-2017


reply by the author on 19-Sep-2017
    Thank you, Jan, for the kind review. Bill