Briarly Hall
Viewing comments for Chapter 6 "London Spring Ball"Historical fiction
2 total reviews
Comment from gene roush
This has the feel of the era.
The narrative reflects the inner dialogue of your protagonist.
There area couple things to consider:
If a dialogue continues from a paragraph to the next, ther's no need to close the paragraph with quotation marks.
This leads to the next point. I think you need to have more confidence in your dialogue. It seems to me that you over use dialogue tags, i.e. "She continued, he said, etc." Allow your action set up the speaker.
Thanks for sharing
Gene
reply by the author on 28-Sep-2017
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This has the feel of the era.
The narrative reflects the inner dialogue of your protagonist.
There area couple things to consider:
If a dialogue continues from a paragraph to the next, ther's no need to close the paragraph with quotation marks.
This leads to the next point. I think you need to have more confidence in your dialogue. It seems to me that you over use dialogue tags, i.e. "She continued, he said, etc." Allow your action set up the speaker.
Thanks for sharing
Gene
Comment Written 18-Sep-2017
reply by the author on 28-Sep-2017
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Thanks for taking time to read and most helpful suggestions and commentary zanya
Comment from Supe
This is the first chapter I have read of this book, so a little difficult to follow all the characters. Very impressed with your dialogue and huge vocabulary. I believe I will have to look up a few words when I am done here. I look forward to more chapters to see what happens next.
reply by the author on 17-Sep-2017
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This is the first chapter I have read of this book, so a little difficult to follow all the characters. Very impressed with your dialogue and huge vocabulary. I believe I will have to look up a few words when I am done here. I look forward to more chapters to see what happens next.
Comment Written 15-Sep-2017
reply by the author on 17-Sep-2017
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Thanks for reading and the encouraging review Zanya
