Reviews from

This Time - That Time 2

Viewing comments for Chapter 15 "A Family Chat"
Veronica is sent back again

38 total reviews 
Comment from Dolly'sPoems
Excellent
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Oh to travel back in time and right the wrongs and make mistakes we made right. How would this change our future? Great concept to your story which makes it all the more interesting and just imagine if everyone had that ability, would there be no wars? Or would there just be more chaos than we imagined. Your words flowed so naturally, love Dolly x

 Comment Written 15-Sep-2017


reply by the author on 16-Sep-2017
    It would be lovely, wouldn't it? But, as you say, we could end up making bigger mistakes. Thank you, Dolly, for your lovely review. Big hugs. Sandra. xxx
Comment from alexisleech
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

Another great chapter, Sandra. You manage to pull the reader in to the world of Veronica, James, and Mildred, and create an image of love and friendship most might envy. Having said that, I'm sure they broke the mold with Mildred! The search for a way to get Joe out of Michael continues, and I can't wait to see how you resolve it. I'll be thinking of you in Spain, and I'll miss you till you return.

Alexis xxx

 Comment Written 15-Sep-2017


reply by the author on 15-Sep-2017
    Aww, thank you, Alexis, you always spoil me. I'm so pleased you are following this story and enjoying it. I hope I'm not away for long. I'll miss you too. Big hugs, my friend. :) xxx
Comment from Mustang Patty
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Hi Sandra;
it seems that the problem of how/when time travel happens for the characters is going to be quite the puzzle for you. I do hope you are able to come up with something that really sounds plausible,

~patty~

 Comment Written 15-Sep-2017


reply by the author on 15-Sep-2017
    Why do you think it will be a puzzle for me, Patty? As with most fiction stories writers, this one is already worked out before I started. Not a problem, just a lot of fun. :)) Sandra xx
reply by Mustang Patty on 15-Sep-2017
    Hi Sandra; no offense intended - I have read a few stories involving time travel where the writer had absolutely no idea how to explain the traveling in a coherent way.

    As a reader, I'm waiting to see the end of the 'puzzle.'

    ~patty~
reply by the author on 15-Sep-2017
    I wasn't offended, Patty, I just didn't understand the question. The reader shouldn't know how things are going to end. :) xx

Comment from Janilou
Excellent
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Excellent chapter.

LOVED this paragraph!

A sudden crash made us both jump. Michael's Lego castle was smashed and all the bricks scattered around him. He stared up at us with such a tragic look on his face. "It weren't my doin' ... I don't much know 'ow I got 'ere," he said in a sad, apologetic way. Both Mildred and I looked at each other with dumbfounded expressions.

It was that voice again, and not my precious little boy's.

Talk about setting the stage for what's to come! Brilliant.

I didn't find anything to correct or edits needed. All the best.
Jan

 Comment Written 15-Sep-2017


reply by the author on 15-Sep-2017
    Thank you so much, Jan for another lovely review. I'm glad you are enjoying the story. :)) Sandra xx
Comment from RPSaxena
Excellent
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Hello Sandramitchell,
Nice piece in continuation; smooth flow throughout up to the end; 'Mildred's own unique dialect' is self-evident and gives the theme an original flavor.
Interesting, and worth enjoying!

 Comment Written 15-Sep-2017


reply by the author on 15-Sep-2017
    Thank you so much for your really nice review, my friend. I really appreciate it. :)) Sandra xxx
Comment from rwilliam
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LOVE the photo! It's PERFECT for this chapter!!

"Oh, Lordy, Miss Veronica, was that ... was that ... Oh, Lordy!" Mildred's hands linked fiercely together as she swayed back and forth. Her ashen face accentuated the stunned expression in her eyes. --I loved how you painted this scene. It was just perfect. I could see Mildred's reaction so clearly. BRAVO!! :-)

A strong, sweet cup of tea was needed.--this brought a smile. I love tea!

I then took a couple of chocolate biscuits out for myself. Purely for medicinal purposes, I told myself.--Too funny. HA HA HA ! :-D


I love the ending. I can feel the exasperation of the Mom with this whole thing. *clap *clap* clap. wonderful chapter.r I"m sorry I don't have a six to prove it. I"m all out. :-( But just know you earned a six. :)




 Comment Written 14-Sep-2017


reply by the author on 15-Sep-2017
    Oh. Rebecca, I just loved this review, thank you so very much. It was a six star one, without a doubt and meant a lot to me. Thank you, my friend. I have a big smile on my face. :))) Big hugs, my friend. :) Sandra xxx
Comment from Ulla
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

Hi Sandra, Just found fifteen minutes to go on line, and I thought I'll just go in and have a look. I'm glad I did. Wonderful chapter and how difficult it must be for Veronica. I wonder who 'The Powers to Be' are and who cause her to time travel. Great writing as usual, and an intriguing story. Big hugs, Ulla xxx

 Comment Written 14-Sep-2017


reply by the author on 15-Sep-2017
    Oh, thank you, Ulla! That is so nice of you coming to review while you are on holiday. Thank you so much for the 6 my friend. The powers that be will be back in the next part. Big hugs my dear friend. :) Sandra

    I won't be on here for a while, we will be coming to Spain tomorrow night as my husband's brother is in hospital after having a heart attack. This is his second one, so Graham is very worried. He's younger than Graham by 7 years. I hope you are enjoying your holiday? xxxxx
reply by Ulla on 15-Sep-2017
    Oh, Sandra, I'm so sorry to hear that. It's terrible. No wonder your husband is worried and upset. I will be thinking of you all. I do hope for the best. A big hug Ulla xxxx
Comment from Mrs Happy Poet
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Hello my friend I feel sorry for Veronica such a dilemma she has to try to sort out she knows where Joe is but how to get him to leave Michael without causing any problems for him especially before outsiders notice again I enjoyed look forward to the next chapter regards Jill

 Comment Written 14-Sep-2017


reply by the author on 15-Sep-2017
    Thank you so much for another of your lovely reviews, my friend. Things will be happening soon! :)) Big hugs my friend. :) xxx

Comment from Meia (MESAYERS)
Excellent
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I am English so I like the use of U.k English, it is the truest form of English, we did originate the language! You write well with depth and with verve. Your work is exciting and vigorous, I enjoyed it immensely and look forward to continuing with reading the story. Kindest regards and well done Meia x

 Comment Written 14-Sep-2017


reply by the author on 14-Sep-2017
    That is a lovely compliment, Meia, thank you so much! I'm so pleased you enjoy this story. :) Sandra x
Comment from C.A. Wittman
Excellent
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It appears the monastery is part of the solution for helping Joe get back to his own time. Good post.

For your consideration:

as he stared at all the Lego(s) scattered...

James sat up straight, the frown developing on his forehead deepening. "Go on, I'm all ears."

...his frown deepening, or, the frown, which had developed on his forehead deepened.

I flopped in James's arms and sighed.

I sank into Jame's arms, or, relaxed into Jame's arms. Flopped is a strange adjective to use here. It gives the image of Veronica's throwing herself at James in a rag doll sort of way.

All the best, Celena



 Comment Written 14-Sep-2017


reply by the author on 14-Sep-2017

    Thank you so much for your review, Celena, and for the helpful suggestions. I will take a further look at them and will make some changes. I'm really pleased you liked my story. :) sandra
reply by C.A. Wittman on 14-Sep-2017
    My pleasure, Sandra!