A Heartless Winter Day
Imagine! Winter's only six months away.28 total reviews
Comment from rosehill (Wendy)
Congratulations on the win, Rod. The piece is wonderful. I of course am always a huge fan of rhyme and rhythm, but the cold, snowy world you let us see through your eyes and words had me thoroughly chilled and thinking that the hot summer days I have been bemoaning are actually quite acceptable. The alliteration in the opening line caught me up and the compilation of lovely 'C' sounds in the third made me smile. Thanks for reminding me that winter is not a great deal of fun. - Wendy
reply by the author on 07-Aug-2017
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Congratulations on the win, Rod. The piece is wonderful. I of course am always a huge fan of rhyme and rhythm, but the cold, snowy world you let us see through your eyes and words had me thoroughly chilled and thinking that the hot summer days I have been bemoaning are actually quite acceptable. The alliteration in the opening line caught me up and the compilation of lovely 'C' sounds in the third made me smile. Thanks for reminding me that winter is not a great deal of fun. - Wendy
Comment Written 07-Aug-2017
reply by the author on 07-Aug-2017
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Thank you so much for your wonderful review of "Heartless Winter Day," Wendy, and that bright gold star. As you can imagine, I am not a fan of winter, but I am thrilled this poem put you there because of the words and alliteration. Rod
Comment from HarryT
The reader feels the bleakness of this cold, winter day. Love " herringbones the sunken sky." The The word picture painted hardly need the photograph. Opening stanza is wonderful. Nothing seems forced, the poem flows so well. The rhyme facilitates the flowing rhythm of the work.
reply by the author on 06-Aug-2017
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The reader feels the bleakness of this cold, winter day. Love " herringbones the sunken sky." The The word picture painted hardly need the photograph. Opening stanza is wonderful. Nothing seems forced, the poem flows so well. The rhyme facilitates the flowing rhythm of the work.
Comment Written 06-Aug-2017
reply by the author on 06-Aug-2017
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I am delighted and honored by your wonderful response to "Heartless Winter Day," Harry. Thank you also for that bright gold star. Rod
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You are welcome.
Comment from kiwigirl2821
Hi Rod, I love that word "herringbones" It has such a descriptive flavor to it!
I used to live in Michigan and it felt like that third stanza.
"Since Sol's been cloaked by dormant clouds,
backcountry air's spit-freezing cold.
Ice cracks and topples brittle limbs
on to snow-crusted wind-swept wo[r]ld."
I think there should be a [r] in that last word. Actually I just looked that wold word up and I suppose it definitely fits as is. Sorry 'bout that, anyways this is a wonderful write full of delicious descriptive words that make the reader feel the winter cold. Bravo! xoxo Kiwi
reply by the author on 05-Aug-2017
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Hi Rod, I love that word "herringbones" It has such a descriptive flavor to it!
I used to live in Michigan and it felt like that third stanza.
"Since Sol's been cloaked by dormant clouds,
backcountry air's spit-freezing cold.
Ice cracks and topples brittle limbs
on to snow-crusted wind-swept wo[r]ld."
I think there should be a [r] in that last word. Actually I just looked that wold word up and I suppose it definitely fits as is. Sorry 'bout that, anyways this is a wonderful write full of delicious descriptive words that make the reader feel the winter cold. Bravo! xoxo Kiwi
Comment Written 05-Aug-2017
reply by the author on 05-Aug-2017
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Hi Kiwi. I am delighted you enjoyed "Winter Day" so much and truly appreciate your kind praise of my choice of words.
Comment from valmay
I loved your look at a bleak winter. I often wished I could migrate like the birds when I lived in northern climes. I could see your herringbone weave of winter clouds over snow crusted wind swept wold. Best wishes always.
reply by the author on 05-Aug-2017
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I loved your look at a bleak winter. I often wished I could migrate like the birds when I lived in northern climes. I could see your herringbone weave of winter clouds over snow crusted wind swept wold. Best wishes always.
Comment Written 05-Aug-2017
reply by the author on 05-Aug-2017
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Thank you so much for sharing "inter Day" and your generous rating. I am so glad such days are still 5-6 months away. Again, many thanks.
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Not for me in the middle of winter, but this is Australia, no snow and some wispy sunshine.
Comment from SueZen
I find poems that touch me deeply hard to review, as my words are inadequate to express the "emotional" impact such poems have on me.
Each verse sends a sort of chill down my spine, as if I were the naked tree, the fleeting bird or creature seeking a hole to hibernate in, escape from the cold, stark, bleak of winter's manifestation and Arctic blasts. If I were a composer I would write the music for this poem and call it : Winter Requiem. The lyrics (your poem) to be sung slowly in bass, alt and mezzo voices. Good luck in contest - might again be a winner !
reply by the author on 05-Aug-2017
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I find poems that touch me deeply hard to review, as my words are inadequate to express the "emotional" impact such poems have on me.
Each verse sends a sort of chill down my spine, as if I were the naked tree, the fleeting bird or creature seeking a hole to hibernate in, escape from the cold, stark, bleak of winter's manifestation and Arctic blasts. If I were a composer I would write the music for this poem and call it : Winter Requiem. The lyrics (your poem) to be sung slowly in bass, alt and mezzo voices. Good luck in contest - might again be a winner !
Comment Written 05-Aug-2017
reply by the author on 05-Aug-2017
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I am delighted and flattered "Winter Day" touched you so deeply, Sue. I wish you were a composer as I'd love to hear the music you chose for these lyrics. Thank you so much for your kind praise and that big gold star.
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And I thank you for your sweet, appreciative reaction to my review ! Actually, in my way, do compose music, but not in notes on paper. Tunes, music just pop up in my "head" and I hum, whistle or sing to myself, so not already existing music. Have a lovely day,love Sue xxx
Comment from MissMerri
This is a beautiful poem, with consistent meter and rhyme, and also a vividly painted scene. The first two lines set the bar so high, immediately telling the reader this is a well-written poem, and it fulfills the promise well. I enjoyed each verse. The language is creative and evocative. Truly a beautiful entry in the snow contest.
reply by the author on 05-Aug-2017
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This is a beautiful poem, with consistent meter and rhyme, and also a vividly painted scene. The first two lines set the bar so high, immediately telling the reader this is a well-written poem, and it fulfills the promise well. I enjoyed each verse. The language is creative and evocative. Truly a beautiful entry in the snow contest.
Comment Written 05-Aug-2017
reply by the author on 05-Aug-2017
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What a lovely tribute! I am extremely flattered, MissMerri. Thank you so much.
Comment from Irish Rain
I've known days like that. You must be in Australia, or Africa? Somewhere where they're getting winter. Ours is 4 months away, I can't wait! I love your entry, blessings..
reply by the author on 04-Aug-2017
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I've known days like that. You must be in Australia, or Africa? Somewhere where they're getting winter. Ours is 4 months away, I can't wait! I love your entry, blessings..
Comment Written 04-Aug-2017
reply by the author on 04-Aug-2017
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Thank you, Irish, for your kind praise. Like you, however, I am still in summer. I wrote this on a hot muggy day.
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Well, I don't blame you...maybe I need to write some 'snow' and feel cooler!
Comment from Bill Schott
This poem about snow, A Heartless Winter Day, written in a perfect iambic tetrameter, captures well the depression caused buy such a relentlessly savage winter season. The seeming decimation of all life can sometimes affect us as well, leaving life's pauses and disappointments to chill us like this example of nature's curtain of death. Nice capture of this dark sensibility.
reply by the author on 04-Aug-2017
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This poem about snow, A Heartless Winter Day, written in a perfect iambic tetrameter, captures well the depression caused buy such a relentlessly savage winter season. The seeming decimation of all life can sometimes affect us as well, leaving life's pauses and disappointments to chill us like this example of nature's curtain of death. Nice capture of this dark sensibility.
Comment Written 04-Aug-2017
reply by the author on 04-Aug-2017
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Thank you, Bill, for sharing my winter poem and for your very kind praise of it.
Comment from estory
The poem has a tried and true structure, a familiar meter. The alliterations make the music here. The images are vivid and appropriate for this pastoral romantic theme. We have those fallen fence posts, which is a nice original image to find. Here in North Carolina winter seems like a memory from New York. I can deal with 2' of snow, and 60-70 in January and February. estory
reply by the author on 04-Aug-2017
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The poem has a tried and true structure, a familiar meter. The alliterations make the music here. The images are vivid and appropriate for this pastoral romantic theme. We have those fallen fence posts, which is a nice original image to find. Here in North Carolina winter seems like a memory from New York. I can deal with 2' of snow, and 60-70 in January and February. estory
Comment Written 04-Aug-2017
reply by the author on 04-Aug-2017
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I am delighted you enjoyed my winter scene even though it's a bit foreign to you now. Thank you so much for your kind praise.
Comment from Meia (MESAYERS)
Since Sol's been cloaked by dormant clouds,
backcountry air's spit-freezing cold.
Ice cracks and topples brittle limbs
on to snow-crusted wind-swept wold. ' I loved this part of your wonderful poem. I get 'winter' from it more than just 'Snow' but I am sure it will do very well in the competition, it is beautifully written kindest regards Meia xx
reply by the author on 04-Aug-2017
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Since Sol's been cloaked by dormant clouds,
backcountry air's spit-freezing cold.
Ice cracks and topples brittle limbs
on to snow-crusted wind-swept wold. ' I loved this part of your wonderful poem. I get 'winter' from it more than just 'Snow' but I am sure it will do very well in the competition, it is beautifully written kindest regards Meia xx
Comment Written 04-Aug-2017
reply by the author on 04-Aug-2017
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I am very pleased you enjoyed my poem, especially this stanza. Thank you so much ch for your kind praise and encouraging comments.
