This Time - That Time 2
Viewing comments for Chapter 8 "The Search Begins"Veronica is sent back again
38 total reviews
Comment from Joy Graham
I was hoping the cemetery would have more clues. Where was Sir John buried? And Lady Gwynneth? It's all a mystery to me and I'm waiting for you to spell it all out and solve the mystery.
Joy xx
reply by the author on 05-Mar-2018
  |
I was hoping the cemetery would have more clues. Where was Sir John buried? And Lady Gwynneth? It's all a mystery to me and I'm waiting for you to spell it all out and solve the mystery.
Joy xx
Comment Written 05-Mar-2018
reply by the author on 05-Mar-2018
-
I must put that in when I do my final edit. Their graves will be in the family tomb. All under one roof, so to speak, lol. Thank you, Joy, some little things like that need to be picked up. Thank you for another lovely review. You must be getting a headache by now!! Big hugs, my friend. :) Sandra xx
Comment from giraffmang
Nice continuation. Sorry I missed this one earlier, still busy with the house and all...
bacon, it's rind crisping up on the griddle - its rind.
"I've been thinkin' about your missing man," - perhaps missing should be missin' here to preserve the dialectal tic?
I mention this because generally pronounce similar words the same way. You do it with travelling here as well in this piece of dialogue. Dunno... what you think?
pointing to the furthest corner - generally farthest for physical distance.
reply by the author on 06-Aug-2017
|
Nice continuation. Sorry I missed this one earlier, still busy with the house and all...
bacon, it's rind crisping up on the griddle - its rind.
"I've been thinkin' about your missing man," - perhaps missing should be missin' here to preserve the dialectal tic?
I mention this because generally pronounce similar words the same way. You do it with travelling here as well in this piece of dialogue. Dunno... what you think?
pointing to the furthest corner - generally farthest for physical distance.
Comment Written 06-Aug-2017
reply by the author on 06-Aug-2017
-
I am so cross that I got the 'further/farther wrong! Yes, you're right about the 'missing, it shouldn't have the 'g' on the end. Thank you so much for this great review, G, and for pointing out the errors. I'll go and sort that now. Now to read your other review!! Big hugs, my friend. :) Sandra xx
Comment from rwilliam
Excellent chapter. I enjoyed it.
I liked the way you put in daily life with the problem solving of what to do with the time travel.
The cemetery scene was so visual. I could see 'us' looking through the grave stones and Michael with the butterfly hunt. Very sweet.
Congrats on the awards.
reply by the author on 06-Aug-2017
 |
Excellent chapter. I enjoyed it.
I liked the way you put in daily life with the problem solving of what to do with the time travel.
The cemetery scene was so visual. I could see 'us' looking through the grave stones and Michael with the butterfly hunt. Very sweet.
Congrats on the awards.
Comment Written 05-Aug-2017
reply by the author on 06-Aug-2017
-
Thank you so very much for this lovely review and the shiny 6 stars! I'm delighted you enjoyed this part. Big hugs, :) Sandra xx
Comment from wordsfromsue
Okay, a bit anti climatic after the last few chapters (;-)) but the story still moves along nicely.
You continue to make me keep reading to get the answers to all these mysteries!
reply by the author on 03-Aug-2017
|
Okay, a bit anti climatic after the last few chapters (;-)) but the story still moves along nicely.
You continue to make me keep reading to get the answers to all these mysteries!
Comment Written 03-Aug-2017
reply by the author on 03-Aug-2017
-
This one is really part one of two, I'm posting the next part in half an hour or so. Keep tuned! Another big hug! :) xxxx
Comment from l.raven
HI Sandra, maybe that's where I went wrong...I should have taken my son Michael to some graveyards to play...instead of the park...couldn't have hurt...LOL...but I still love him...Veronica should just go visit the grandparents ghosts...maybe...or maybe Lady Ann would know something...hmmmmmm...ok ...I'll wait...another awesome chapter sweet one...and a perfect picture...very well written....love ya you...Linda xxoo
keep me up on Ian and Sarah...say hi to Ian for me...all in my prayers...loveeeeeeee xxoo
reply by the author on 01-Aug-2017
|
HI Sandra, maybe that's where I went wrong...I should have taken my son Michael to some graveyards to play...instead of the park...couldn't have hurt...LOL...but I still love him...Veronica should just go visit the grandparents ghosts...maybe...or maybe Lady Ann would know something...hmmmmmm...ok ...I'll wait...another awesome chapter sweet one...and a perfect picture...very well written....love ya you...Linda xxoo
keep me up on Ian and Sarah...say hi to Ian for me...all in my prayers...loveeeeeeee xxoo
Comment Written 31-Jul-2017
reply by the author on 01-Aug-2017
-
Hi Linda, thank you my dear friend!! I'm glad you like this part it leads to more clues! Lady Ann said she's resting! LOL. Big hugs, and much lovely! :) Sandra xxxx
I'll let you know of any changes, Sarah is happy that she has her hair back, it's very short at the moment, but she is so tiny it gives her a little pixie look! Ian is happy with his foot now, and he is being monitored regarding the water he is drinking, he has to get it just right or he'll have more problems with his kidneys. I always let him know you are keeping him in your prayers, and Linda. Biggest hugs, my wonderful friend. Hows the decorating and everything going? :) xxxxxx
-
your so welcome you...and glad to hear all is going well...I knew Lady Ann was a lot like me...resting...LOL...love ya Linda xxoo
-
LOL! Linda, you are so funny, and I love you for it! LOL! xxx
Comment from Mrs Happy Poet
Yes my friend this is well written you are moving the story along very well I am enjoying and look forward to the next instalment sorry I'm behind regards Jill
reply by the author on 31-Jul-2017
|
Yes my friend this is well written you are moving the story along very well I am enjoying and look forward to the next instalment sorry I'm behind regards Jill
Comment Written 31-Jul-2017
reply by the author on 31-Jul-2017
-
Thank you so very much, Jill, for the generous 6 stars!!! That is so nice of you, my friend. I'm so pleased you enjoyed this part! Big hugs. :) Sandra xxx
Comment from Pam (respa)
-I like this chapter, Sandra.
-There is a lot of Ver. and her family,
which she deserves.
-But first, Ann hasn't come down
for breakfast, and we learn that
Daveth came to visit.
-It must be hard for a small child, but
Ver. always has a way to comfort her,
and she wants to see Daveth the next time he comes.
-The scene in the cemetery is interesting when
Michael spots the butterfly, but there
is also information that indicates it might be Daveth's grandparents.
-Good ending, too.
reply by the author on 31-Jul-2017
|
-I like this chapter, Sandra.
-There is a lot of Ver. and her family,
which she deserves.
-But first, Ann hasn't come down
for breakfast, and we learn that
Daveth came to visit.
-It must be hard for a small child, but
Ver. always has a way to comfort her,
and she wants to see Daveth the next time he comes.
-The scene in the cemetery is interesting when
Michael spots the butterfly, but there
is also information that indicates it might be Daveth's grandparents.
-Good ending, too.
Comment Written 31-Jul-2017
reply by the author on 31-Jul-2017
-
Thank you so very much, my dear friend, for another of your lovely reviews and the shiny 6 stars! This part is an important one as you will see later. I hoped you would like it. Big hugs my friend and thank you! :) Sandra xxx
-
You are very welcome and deserving of the 6*s and the review, Sandra. I did like the chapter, as there was a calmness to it, yet important details, too.
Comment from rspoet
Hello Sandra,
Another fine chapter to continue the saga, as the detective work begins.
It's good that they didn't find Joe's gravestone, that would have been too easy.
But the possible grandparent's stone suggests they are on the right trail.
Having young Michael in the scene is a good anchor to the reality and simplicity of life and nature, plus the little touches of humor help, too.
If Joe had been "trapped" in the future, he likely would have been
completely overwhelmed by the changed world and even the idea that he'd
been shifted into the future. Even to have been taken forward in time for a short time
could have been traumatic for someone like Joe. Imagine seeing planes in the air, cars, TVs, cell phones, modern clothes, etc. That's a whole novel all by itself.
It's good to be back with Mildred and Veronica. They are thread that binds the series, like Sherlock and Watson or Lord Peter Whimsey and his butler, Bunter.
We'll see if the register is the clue they need.
Well done, my friend.
RS
In the author notes, isn't Joe Hammett Daveth's father.
reply by the author on 31-Jul-2017
|
Hello Sandra,
Another fine chapter to continue the saga, as the detective work begins.
It's good that they didn't find Joe's gravestone, that would have been too easy.
But the possible grandparent's stone suggests they are on the right trail.
Having young Michael in the scene is a good anchor to the reality and simplicity of life and nature, plus the little touches of humor help, too.
If Joe had been "trapped" in the future, he likely would have been
completely overwhelmed by the changed world and even the idea that he'd
been shifted into the future. Even to have been taken forward in time for a short time
could have been traumatic for someone like Joe. Imagine seeing planes in the air, cars, TVs, cell phones, modern clothes, etc. That's a whole novel all by itself.
It's good to be back with Mildred and Veronica. They are thread that binds the series, like Sherlock and Watson or Lord Peter Whimsey and his butler, Bunter.
We'll see if the register is the clue they need.
Well done, my friend.
RS
In the author notes, isn't Joe Hammett Daveth's father.
Comment Written 31-Jul-2017
reply by the author on 31-Jul-2017
-
I'd love to see what would be like in a hundred years time. Will it be as vastly different then as it would be to the people who lived a hundred years in our past? As you pointed out, the advances we've made in that short time is just amazing. Thank you for pointing out that error in the author's notes, I've changed it to Daveth now. You were the only one to spot that! As for Joe, if he is trapped in the future, goodness knows how he's feeling!!! LOL. Thank you, Robert, for another wonderful review and the lovely stars. Big hugs my friend. :) Sandra xxx
-
Maybe, Joe is trapped in the past. That would be a little twist. Or maybe he's just Rip Van Winkle Hammett. Time will tell, as they say Southampton, UK.
Comment from alexisleech
I love the banter that goes on between Veronica and Mildred, and this chapter is no exception. They have such an easy way between them. Bad news re Joe not being buried in his local church, so I can only assume he moved away from the area, or indeed that he got stuck in Veronica's time after all. Either way, I can't wait to find out!
Alexis xxx
reply by the author on 31-Jul-2017
|
I love the banter that goes on between Veronica and Mildred, and this chapter is no exception. They have such an easy way between them. Bad news re Joe not being buried in his local church, so I can only assume he moved away from the area, or indeed that he got stuck in Veronica's time after all. Either way, I can't wait to find out!
Alexis xxx
Comment Written 31-Jul-2017
reply by the author on 31-Jul-2017
-
Thank you so much, Alexis, for the lovely review and the very shiny 6 stars!! You are a diamond! :) Sandra xx
Comment from Auto-Manic
Hi, came by for a read. I would like to make one suggestion, break up your dialog from your body of description. I helps the reader move along, and doesn't create such a sea of gray in those large paragraph blocks. It also holds the readers attention, keeps them moving, and draws them into the next, whatever the next is. I have a tendency to blur over large blocks of text, if there broken up, I am more apt to follow it, go with the changes and not keep skipping over things.
Write on!
AM
reply by the author on 31-Jul-2017
|
Hi, came by for a read. I would like to make one suggestion, break up your dialog from your body of description. I helps the reader move along, and doesn't create such a sea of gray in those large paragraph blocks. It also holds the readers attention, keeps them moving, and draws them into the next, whatever the next is. I have a tendency to blur over large blocks of text, if there broken up, I am more apt to follow it, go with the changes and not keep skipping over things.
Write on!
AM
Comment Written 30-Jul-2017
reply by the author on 31-Jul-2017
-
Hi AM Thank you for reading my story. The only part that is in one block is the end of the previous part, (part 7) which was copied and pasted over that way to save space. Most people don't even read that bit. But I will break it up. You will notice the new part 8 is in sections as always. :) Sandra
