The Products of Love
Viewing comments for Chapter 8 "Failing a Test"...the story of Jenny and Ron
36 total reviews
Comment from Asem.inspirations
Oh this is great Patty. I am so happy that she was determined to have the baby. When we are young, some of us have made decisions that were not so great and living with them was not great at all. I am so eager to find out what is going to happen when she finally tells Ron. I know that he is still so in love with her so he will possibly be doing a happy dance.
I did notice also your mention of putting on a pot of coffee, ringing truth to you story about "Black Coffee." This story is great Patty. I am enjoying it.
reply by the author on 02-Aug-2017
  |
Oh this is great Patty. I am so happy that she was determined to have the baby. When we are young, some of us have made decisions that were not so great and living with them was not great at all. I am so eager to find out what is going to happen when she finally tells Ron. I know that he is still so in love with her so he will possibly be doing a happy dance.
I did notice also your mention of putting on a pot of coffee, ringing truth to you story about "Black Coffee." This story is great Patty. I am enjoying it.
Comment Written 01-Aug-2017
reply by the author on 02-Aug-2017
-
Hi Tier; thank you so much for reading this chapter - I'm glad you enjoyed it AND I'm glad you noticed my trademark coffee.
I think you will like the rest of the story - it really does turn out well,
~patty~
Comment from dweigt
Good writing! I thought this was where you were going with this, and it certainly adds a complication and raises the stakes for Jenny!
They set up the little test kit, and followed the directions. They needed to wait a full thirty minutes to see if a small ring would form at the bottom of the test tube. -- Wow. Pregnancy tests have certainly gotten easier! Nice historical touch.
they sat on the couch and read about the rising star, Tom Cruise, and the release of Michael Jackson's new album. -- Another nice historical reference. You might want to find what movie Tom Cruise was in that year, and what album Michael Jackson had released, and make the references even more specific.
Well, it is 1983. -- And, since you've established the era with your earlier references, you wouldn't need to mention the year here.
I like it!
Keep writing!
reply by the author on 31-Jul-2017
 |
Good writing! I thought this was where you were going with this, and it certainly adds a complication and raises the stakes for Jenny!
They set up the little test kit, and followed the directions. They needed to wait a full thirty minutes to see if a small ring would form at the bottom of the test tube. -- Wow. Pregnancy tests have certainly gotten easier! Nice historical touch.
they sat on the couch and read about the rising star, Tom Cruise, and the release of Michael Jackson's new album. -- Another nice historical reference. You might want to find what movie Tom Cruise was in that year, and what album Michael Jackson had released, and make the references even more specific.
Well, it is 1983. -- And, since you've established the era with your earlier references, you wouldn't need to mention the year here.
I like it!
Keep writing!
Comment Written 31-Jul-2017
reply by the author on 31-Jul-2017
-
Hi there; thank you so much for this great review. I did go and add the reference to Tom Cruise's movie of that year. How could I forget 'Risky Business?' Of course, Michael's album that year was 'Thriller.' I will go and massage them into the sentences.
I changed the reference in Patty's line about it being 1983.
I appreciate your input and you bestowing this work with a SIX star.
~patty~
Comment from Cindy Warren
Oh, I wonder how Ron will react. One good thing about having to catch up is that I don't have long to find out. Tho I know the final outcome you still manage to keep me in suspense.
reply by the author on 31-Jul-2017
|
Oh, I wonder how Ron will react. One good thing about having to catch up is that I don't have long to find out. Tho I know the final outcome you still manage to keep me in suspense.
Comment Written 31-Jul-2017
reply by the author on 31-Jul-2017
-
Hi Cindy; thank you so much for continuing to follow along; the final chapter will be in present time, so you really don't know how it all ends up,
~patty~
Comment from Marvin Calloway
You're doing a great job with this story. The dialogue is realistic. The emotions are what a reader would expect.
We know where the story is heading yet we're still on the edge of our seats.
Marv
reply by the author on 31-Jul-2017
|
You're doing a great job with this story. The dialogue is realistic. The emotions are what a reader would expect.
We know where the story is heading yet we're still on the edge of our seats.
Marv
Comment Written 30-Jul-2017
reply by the author on 31-Jul-2017
-
Hi Marv/Bill; I'm so glad you are continuing to read this story. I'm glad you find the dialogue realistic - I struggle with the conversations that happened when I wasn't there - but this was from my memories of those days.
The next chapter is up,
~patty~
Comment from Curly Girly
Hi, Patty. This was a good chapter to read. You covered the girls' suspense well. Now the tests have shown she is pregnant, so she's phoned Ron. Will she tell him? How will he react? I'm keen to read more to find out. A great hook here.
Nicole
reply by the author on 31-Jul-2017
|
Hi, Patty. This was a good chapter to read. You covered the girls' suspense well. Now the tests have shown she is pregnant, so she's phoned Ron. Will she tell him? How will he react? I'm keen to read more to find out. A great hook here.
Nicole
Comment Written 30-Jul-2017
reply by the author on 31-Jul-2017
-
Hi Nicole; thank you for the compliment on this chapter. I'm writing from my own memories of that time now, so this was a bit easier to form the conversation - I just had to imagine some parts.
Thank you for reading along,
~patty~
Comment from Brett Matthew West
Two youngsters with a baby on the way. That can lead to trouble up ahead.
Well written story depicting this theme nicely.
Several different directions you could travel this accounting in from this point forward.
reply by the author on 31-Jul-2017
|
Two youngsters with a baby on the way. That can lead to trouble up ahead.
Well written story depicting this theme nicely.
Several different directions you could travel this accounting in from this point forward.
Comment Written 30-Jul-2017
reply by the author on 31-Jul-2017
-
Hi Brett; thank you so much for continuing to follow this story. Yes, there is a great deal more in store for these two characters.
~patty~
Comment from pbomar1115
Even though Jenny did not want sex until she was in a committed relationship, she did have a conversation about what to do if she got pregnant. Many women desire sex only in a committed relationship. A very understandable reason for her but not all women. I would like to talk Jenny's side but clearly, to me, Ron did not have sex with Jenny without her feeling highly regarded. To find out that Ron was not a reliable boyfriend is sad but Jenny reaction makes her look very inexperienced. More like a thirteen-year-old first sexual experience with an 18 boy.
reply by the author on 29-Jul-2017
|
Even though Jenny did not want sex until she was in a committed relationship, she did have a conversation about what to do if she got pregnant. Many women desire sex only in a committed relationship. A very understandable reason for her but not all women. I would like to talk Jenny's side but clearly, to me, Ron did not have sex with Jenny without her feeling highly regarded. To find out that Ron was not a reliable boyfriend is sad but Jenny reaction makes her look very inexperienced. More like a thirteen-year-old first sexual experience with an 18 boy.
Comment Written 29-Jul-2017
reply by the author on 29-Jul-2017
-
Hi Phillip; I think both of these people were confused and a bit immature for their age. Both of them didn't date much during high school and Jenny was always busy with school and work to date much in her twenties. Ron was just too driven for his own good.
The next chapter in their story will be up on Sunday morning. Thank you so much for your continued support,
~patty~
-
I still think the story is interesting, Patty. It evokes different point of views.
Phillip
Comment from dovemarie
Dear patty, It was in the 80s that I had my baby too. And a lot of people didn't understand. I can feel for "Jenny," your protagonist. Misunderstanding and miscommunication can be devastating. Dove
reply by the author on 30-Jul-2017
|
Dear patty, It was in the 80s that I had my baby too. And a lot of people didn't understand. I can feel for "Jenny," your protagonist. Misunderstanding and miscommunication can be devastating. Dove
Comment Written 29-Jul-2017
reply by the author on 30-Jul-2017
-
Hi there; it was a hard time for the real 'Jenny.' I learned a great deal going through the experience with her. I think we both grew up a great deal during those months.
Thank you so much for reading and reviewing,
~patty~
Comment from Bichon
Oh I really enjoyed this! I haven't read the other parts, but I could understand what was happening very easily. Very interesting, I can't wait to read more!!
reply by the author on 30-Jul-2017
|
Oh I really enjoyed this! I haven't read the other parts, but I could understand what was happening very easily. Very interesting, I can't wait to read more!!
Comment Written 29-Jul-2017
reply by the author on 30-Jul-2017
-
Hi Chloe; thank you so much for taking up this story. I hope you have time to read along as the story trudges along to its end.
~patty~
Comment from Margaret Snowdon
Well,t hat didn't come as a surprise to us, altho she'd only slept with Ron the once - what bad luck!! Or is it? It might well bring them back together - I hope so - I do like a happy ending - sigh.
A well written chapter, Patty.
Blessings,
Margaret
reply by the author on 30-Jul-2017
|
Well,t hat didn't come as a surprise to us, altho she'd only slept with Ron the once - what bad luck!! Or is it? It might well bring them back together - I hope so - I do like a happy ending - sigh.
A well written chapter, Patty.
Blessings,
Margaret
Comment Written 29-Jul-2017
reply by the author on 30-Jul-2017
-
Hi Margaret; thank you so much for continuing to support this story. The next chapter will be up on Sunday, so you will see Ron's reaction to the news.
~patty~
