The Products of Love
Viewing comments for Chapter 6 "Pain of a Lost Love"...the story of Jenny and Ron
59 total reviews
Comment from Lilol
This is nice. However, I think that for the next chapter, Ron should try to talk to her and expose Veronica. There should be a little more detail on what Veronica did to him.
reply by the author on 22-Jul-2017
This is nice. However, I think that for the next chapter, Ron should try to talk to her and expose Veronica. There should be a little more detail on what Veronica did to him.
Comment Written 21-Jul-2017
reply by the author on 22-Jul-2017
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Hi; thank you for reading and reviewing. I think you will find the next chapters interesting,
~patty~
Comment from Ulla
Hi Patty, it was short but sweet. Yeah, love has its own path and God know where it leads to at times. Well, he has to learn. I'm looking forward to reading on. All the best. Ulla:)))
reply by the author on 21-Jul-2017
Hi Patty, it was short but sweet. Yeah, love has its own path and God know where it leads to at times. Well, he has to learn. I'm looking forward to reading on. All the best. Ulla:)))
Comment Written 21-Jul-2017
reply by the author on 21-Jul-2017
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Hi; thank you so much for your continued support - the next chapter will be longer and filled with a new twist,
~patty~
Comment from dweigt
Glad I had a six left! This is very good! I like how you describe Ron's confusion and frustration, and I found out who the mystery woman was! (I'm probably reading out of order again. Sorry!) Veronica's identity is a great twist and complication, certainly not what I was expecting.
No spags that I could see.
Keep writing!
reply by the author on 21-Jul-2017
Glad I had a six left! This is very good! I like how you describe Ron's confusion and frustration, and I found out who the mystery woman was! (I'm probably reading out of order again. Sorry!) Veronica's identity is a great twist and complication, certainly not what I was expecting.
No spags that I could see.
Keep writing!
Comment Written 21-Jul-2017
reply by the author on 21-Jul-2017
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Hi there; - you are absolutely in the right place and reading in order. The next chapter (currently being written) should be posted by Sunday morning.
Thank you so much for reading and for the lovely six stars -- I'm glad you are enjoying the story line,
~patty~
Comment from Fridayauthor
This is an interesting continuation of this story. There is a degree of tension that I like very much and the flow is nice and smooth.
It's too bad he is alone as the soul-searching here would work well in dialogue.
Most enjoyable.
Thank you!
reply by the author on 21-Jul-2017
This is an interesting continuation of this story. There is a degree of tension that I like very much and the flow is nice and smooth.
It's too bad he is alone as the soul-searching here would work well in dialogue.
Most enjoyable.
Thank you!
Comment Written 21-Jul-2017
reply by the author on 21-Jul-2017
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Hi there; yeah - I struggled to find a character to come out onto the dock to talk with him, but the truth is part of Ron's problem lies in his insistence on dealing with things in his own way - he doesn't consult friends or colleagues - he's not that close to them and he has a fierce feeling of privacy.
So, this needed to be written the way it was - home the emotions still showed through,
~patty~
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A stray dog that wanders by? I used someone talking to a sea gull one time...
Just a step above talking to yourself...
Thanks!
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Very interesting - I will use it in the next chapters where Ron wrestles with the problem - alone - as always,
THANK YOU - ~patty~
Comment from rtobaygo
Good afternoon, Patty
Another excellent continuation. Seems 'lover boy's facing the reality that he is no longer a part of Jenny's world . . . or is she pregnant with Ron's child? Enjoyed.
Take care and stay safe,
Ray
reply by the author on 21-Jul-2017
Good afternoon, Patty
Another excellent continuation. Seems 'lover boy's facing the reality that he is no longer a part of Jenny's world . . . or is she pregnant with Ron's child? Enjoyed.
Take care and stay safe,
Ray
Comment Written 21-Jul-2017
reply by the author on 21-Jul-2017
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Hi Ray; thank you so much for continuing along with the story. I think you will surprised with the twists and turns yet to come,
~patty~
Comment from apky
Heaven, above, I'm so rooting for the two to come back together. I'm already in love with Ron, the minute I read about Veronica The Sybil!
What did guys do when a woman was mad at them? He had never tried to heal a relationship before. Flowers and candy seemed to work in the movies - or was that only because the situation needed to be wrapped up in one-hundred and twenty minutes? ~ I loved this, absolutely brilliant writing.
Uh-huh! Now I'm nailbiting curious:
Why did Veronica have to ruin everything? The curse of his half-sister was a complication in his life he didn't share with Jenny or anyone.
Wish I had the six!
reply by the author on 21-Jul-2017
Heaven, above, I'm so rooting for the two to come back together. I'm already in love with Ron, the minute I read about Veronica The Sybil!
What did guys do when a woman was mad at them? He had never tried to heal a relationship before. Flowers and candy seemed to work in the movies - or was that only because the situation needed to be wrapped up in one-hundred and twenty minutes? ~ I loved this, absolutely brilliant writing.
Uh-huh! Now I'm nailbiting curious:
Why did Veronica have to ruin everything? The curse of his half-sister was a complication in his life he didn't share with Jenny or anyone.
Wish I had the six!
Comment Written 21-Jul-2017
reply by the author on 21-Jul-2017
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Hi Aki; thank you for your continued support for this story. I think you will enjoy the twists and turns coming up. I'm working on the next chapter now and it should be posted by Sunday.
Thank you for the virtual six - its the thought that counts!
~patty~
Comment from Asyraf N. Jamsari
This is very well written. I really like the font that you're using. It is so nice to know that this is actually based on real event and you managed to recreate it with your own version. Nice flow and plot development. Keep up the good work.
reply by the author on 21-Jul-2017
This is very well written. I really like the font that you're using. It is so nice to know that this is actually based on real event and you managed to recreate it with your own version. Nice flow and plot development. Keep up the good work.
Comment Written 21-Jul-2017
reply by the author on 21-Jul-2017
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Thank you so much for stopping by to read and review. I'm glad you enjoyed the story, and I hope you will continue to follow along as the rest of the plot continues to unfold,
~patty~
Comment from Sandra Stoner-Mitchell
He'd better come up with something soon, or there will be big problems for Jenny. Why on earth didn't he just say Veronica is his half sister? That would have stopped this before it had even started. Such a shame how inner conflict can create such problems. Well done again! :) Sandra xx
reply by the author on 21-Jul-2017
He'd better come up with something soon, or there will be big problems for Jenny. Why on earth didn't he just say Veronica is his half sister? That would have stopped this before it had even started. Such a shame how inner conflict can create such problems. Well done again! :) Sandra xx
Comment Written 21-Jul-2017
reply by the author on 21-Jul-2017
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Hi Sandra; thank you so much for your continued support of this story. There's more twists and turns to come,
~patty~
Comment from Asem.inspirations
Hello Patty, this story is continuing to steal my heart. I feel so awful for Ron. he seems so innocent and precious. He is a loyal young man, loyal to his heart and feelings about Jenny.
Jenny should allow him the chance to explain himself. It is obvious the way he feels so I am hoping that she does give in to allow him to explain himself. I am in love with the way Ron is. What a gentleman.
reply by the author on 21-Jul-2017
Hello Patty, this story is continuing to steal my heart. I feel so awful for Ron. he seems so innocent and precious. He is a loyal young man, loyal to his heart and feelings about Jenny.
Jenny should allow him the chance to explain himself. It is obvious the way he feels so I am hoping that she does give in to allow him to explain himself. I am in love with the way Ron is. What a gentleman.
Comment Written 21-Jul-2017
reply by the author on 21-Jul-2017
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Hi Tier; it is very true that Ron is a unique individual. I know him in real life, and I must say I don't think I've met very many people like him. He's in his sixties now, and he still struggles with many aspects of relationships,
~patty~
Comment from smbau
Glad I was able to read this after reading the previous chapter. Great character introductions. You many consider listing your characters and roles in the story in the author's notes. The flow and content was well organized. You continue leaving the reader in suspense as you describe Ron's perception without giving away the very reason they [Jenny and Ron} broke-up.
reply by the author on 21-Jul-2017
Glad I was able to read this after reading the previous chapter. Great character introductions. You many consider listing your characters and roles in the story in the author's notes. The flow and content was well organized. You continue leaving the reader in suspense as you describe Ron's perception without giving away the very reason they [Jenny and Ron} broke-up.
Comment Written 21-Jul-2017
reply by the author on 21-Jul-2017
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Hi; thank you so much for reading and reviewing. I appreciate your kind words of encouragement,
~patty~