Comment from BeasPeas

Excellent

Hi Don. You did a good job with this poem which rhymes well, has good rhythm and tells a story. Honesty is the be policy as they say. Congratulations on placing in the contest. Marilyn

 Comment Written 13-Jul-2017

---

reply by the author on 13-Jul-2017

Thanks, Marilyn. I wrote it as a children's poem, as the contest title made that a clear aim. Mine was the only poem in the contest written for the little ones. The committee didn't intercede, but, ironically, I did. There was one piece that ignored the prompts entirely, with three or four "violations," and and the poem itself, was angry and not at all about, or suitable, for children.
When I pointed that out, he replied that he didn't care, he just wanted to vent, and show up all the hypocritical Fanstorians, who he despises. I suggested he think about it, and, as there was plenty of time, consider writing something new. Before I knew it, he had done exactly that. It was a poem about a very angry little boy who behaved vindictively, but the recalcitrant writer had ignored the most important point of the contest. His child didn't learn a moral lesson, but doubled down on his bad behavior. I don't know the writer, but I liked the way, if not what, he wrote, and I suggested that there was no point in not letting the kid learn a lesson, and he replied he'd probably go with it, anyway.

I think this was a perfect example of the old saw, "No good deed goes unpunished,."
He did revise, had his kid misbehave in a disgusting way, and fake learning a lesson.
The poem was the winner by a wide margin.

I should have let well enough alone. He wouldn't have found it necessary to create another person in his own image. I hope it's not going to be a series.

All the best,

Don

reply by BeasPeas on 13-Jul-2017

The contest committee is supposed to monitor content and either request the writer to make some changes or it will disqualify a work that doesn't honor the rules. In this case, I guess they didn't do that. Sometimes I do believe it is who you are that counts. I've heard other stories like this. It's best for camaraderie on the site if everyone is subject to the same rules.

Comment from gudbjorg

Excellent

A fabulous needed message you bring out in your poem so clear and well done. Yes, as you bring out so well in your poem, telling the truth is always the best policy not matter what. It can be very difficult in some circumstances but nevertheless, the best policy is telling the truth. The poem is a very inspiring read, with good rhymes and rhythm. I enjoyed it.

 Comment Written 11-Jul-2017

---

reply by the author on 11-Jul-2017

Thank you so much for your encouraging comments. As I'm sure you'll agree, it is very important for their later lives, to instill in children the moral necessity of being an honest and truthful person.

Comment from Cycler

Exceptional

Loved this! The rhyme was great and the flow of your poem marvelous. Of course, there is a nice message embedded inside. I did notice one typo "he little girl cried" I am assuming is "the little girl cried" I only point that out because I am sure you'd like this to be as perfect as possible ... otherwise, I just enjoyed the ride you provided.

 Comment Written 11-Jul-2017

---

reply by the author on 11-Jul-2017

A triple thank you, Cycler, for your flattering review, keen eye that spotted my typo, and, of course, those much appreciated six stars!

reply by Cycler on 11-Jul-2017

:-)
You are welcome. It is a pleasure to read you!