Renga (Barren tree limbs break)
by Dean Kuch, Hitcher, and Gypsy Blue Rose41 total reviews
Comment from Sugar Cube1
You put so much work into your writing and it really shows. I love your bits of alliteration, like "slowly the sun sinks, silent". I also love the picture you choose for the poem. Fits it perfectly and the picture is very cool! Great job!
reply by the author on 10-Jun-2017
You put so much work into your writing and it really shows. I love your bits of alliteration, like "slowly the sun sinks, silent". I also love the picture you choose for the poem. Fits it perfectly and the picture is very cool! Great job!
Comment Written 09-Jun-2017
reply by the author on 10-Jun-2017
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Thank you for the review and kind words my friend. We appreciate your feedback.
Gypsy
Comment from Winslow
Dear Gypsy, Hitcher, and Dean,
A great collaboration between the three of you. For the love of the Samuri maybe sweet but bitter as he's given his life to the cause. Very sad.
Warm regards,
Winslow
reply by the author on 10-Jun-2017
Dear Gypsy, Hitcher, and Dean,
A great collaboration between the three of you. For the love of the Samuri maybe sweet but bitter as he's given his life to the cause. Very sad.
Warm regards,
Winslow
Comment Written 09-Jun-2017
reply by the author on 10-Jun-2017
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Thank you for the review and kind words my friend. We appreciate your feedback and generous six stars. Thank you!
Gypsy
Comment from Heather Knight
This is lovely, MariVal. I like the allusions to trees you use throughout the poem.
There's something that surprises me: her wedding kimono is white. In China white is the color of mourning. Is it not the same in Japan?
Thanks for sharing.
reply by the author on 09-Jun-2017
This is lovely, MariVal. I like the allusions to trees you use throughout the poem.
There's something that surprises me: her wedding kimono is white. In China white is the color of mourning. Is it not the same in Japan?
Thanks for sharing.
Comment Written 09-Jun-2017
reply by the author on 09-Jun-2017
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No, in Japan white is not the color for mourning, black is. I looked at pictures of wedding kimonos and some were white.
Thank you for reading and reviewing our renga, you are very kind and we appreciate it.
Gypsy
Comment from jusylee72
Your poem is an excellent lesson in poetry and writing. I learned so much from your comments, but back to the poem. It was true artistry, thank you for writing. it.
judy
reply by the author on 09-Jun-2017
Your poem is an excellent lesson in poetry and writing. I learned so much from your comments, but back to the poem. It was true artistry, thank you for writing. it.
judy
Comment Written 08-Jun-2017
reply by the author on 09-Jun-2017
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Thank you for reading and reviewing our renga, you are very kind and we appreciate it.
Gypsy
Comment from Thomas Bowling
This is excellent. I'm familiar enough with your writing style to tell which stanzas are yours. I can also spot Deans, so the remainder must be Hitcher's. I didn't notice until later that you identify each author.
reply by the author on 09-Jun-2017
This is excellent. I'm familiar enough with your writing style to tell which stanzas are yours. I can also spot Deans, so the remainder must be Hitcher's. I didn't notice until later that you identify each author.
Comment Written 08-Jun-2017
reply by the author on 09-Jun-2017
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Thank you for reading and reviewing our renga, you are very kind and we appreciate it.
Gypsy
Comment from rjuselius
this is a brilliant outcome of your collaboration dear friends! i love the alliteration that flows in the poems like a suave swan. the imagery is well thought out and i just adore the wording.
thank you for sharing!
unfortunately i don't have any more sixes left..
blessings!
rebekka x
reply by the author on 09-Jun-2017
this is a brilliant outcome of your collaboration dear friends! i love the alliteration that flows in the poems like a suave swan. the imagery is well thought out and i just adore the wording.
thank you for sharing!
unfortunately i don't have any more sixes left..
blessings!
rebekka x
Comment Written 08-Jun-2017
reply by the author on 09-Jun-2017
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Thank you for reading and reviewing our renga, you are very kind and we appreciate it.
Gypsy
Comment from lyenochka
Impressive collaborative work! It tells a cohesive story. Great imagery and alliteration. I needed the author's notes for the "naginata" and "Jubei" who I thought was one famous samurai in particular.
reply by the author on 08-Jun-2017
Impressive collaborative work! It tells a cohesive story. Great imagery and alliteration. I needed the author's notes for the "naginata" and "Jubei" who I thought was one famous samurai in particular.
Comment Written 08-Jun-2017
reply by the author on 08-Jun-2017
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Thank you very much for your review and kind words. We appreciate that you took the time to read our renga.
Gypsy
Comment from Oatmeal
Gypsy Blue Rose, Hitcher, Dean Kuch,
Thoughts are expressed and described well. The theme is strong. The descriptive words created wonderful impressions. Your feelings are expressed well. Your arrangement looks very nice. The flow is smooth.
There was no SPAG. No typos. No homophones. No problems at all.
I look forward to seeing you again.
Love you,
Oatmeal
reply by the author on 08-Jun-2017
Gypsy Blue Rose, Hitcher, Dean Kuch,
Thoughts are expressed and described well. The theme is strong. The descriptive words created wonderful impressions. Your feelings are expressed well. Your arrangement looks very nice. The flow is smooth.
There was no SPAG. No typos. No homophones. No problems at all.
I look forward to seeing you again.
Love you,
Oatmeal
Comment Written 08-Jun-2017
reply by the author on 08-Jun-2017
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Thank you very much for your review and kind words. We appreciate that you took the time to read our renga.
Gypsy
Comment from kiwigirl2821
Hi Gypsy. A clever and wonderfully written collaboration! The three of you paint a picture that leaves a reader near breathless. Great piece, clever and I for one love the process! xoxo Kiwi
reply by the author on 08-Jun-2017
Hi Gypsy. A clever and wonderfully written collaboration! The three of you paint a picture that leaves a reader near breathless. Great piece, clever and I for one love the process! xoxo Kiwi
Comment Written 08-Jun-2017
reply by the author on 08-Jun-2017
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Thank you very much for your review and kind words. We appreciate that you took the time to read our renga.
Gypsy
Comment from Janet Foor
I am greatly impressed by what you, Dean Kuch and Hitcher have created with this venture. Each haiku unique and yet follow the theme and story line.
Very nicely done - all of you.
Blessings
Janet
reply by the author on 08-Jun-2017
I am greatly impressed by what you, Dean Kuch and Hitcher have created with this venture. Each haiku unique and yet follow the theme and story line.
Very nicely done - all of you.
Blessings
Janet
Comment Written 08-Jun-2017
reply by the author on 08-Jun-2017
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Thank you very much for your review and kind words. We appreciate that you took the time to read our renga.
Gypsy