Picture This
Viewing comments for Chapter 30 "When Rain Obscures the Light"poems from Picture This Challenge
41 total reviews
Comment from Ric Myworld
It's always a pleasure to read another of your fine poems, even those that tug at the ol' heart strings. Thought of as merely drunks, dopers, bums, or stinking street people, it's hard for many to stop and consider that these people had a mom, a dad, maybe even a brother, or sister, a wife, and possibly children of their own. They had a life. They didn't just give up and become a stumbling gutter rat by choice. Something mighty traumatic killed their wills and caused them to rot away in seclusion. Thanks for sharing.
reply by the author on 12-May-2017
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It's always a pleasure to read another of your fine poems, even those that tug at the ol' heart strings. Thought of as merely drunks, dopers, bums, or stinking street people, it's hard for many to stop and consider that these people had a mom, a dad, maybe even a brother, or sister, a wife, and possibly children of their own. They had a life. They didn't just give up and become a stumbling gutter rat by choice. Something mighty traumatic killed their wills and caused them to rot away in seclusion. Thanks for sharing.
Comment Written 12-May-2017
reply by the author on 12-May-2017
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You are so right, Ric, everyone has a story, and it's not always their fault these things have happened to them. Thank you so much, my friend, for another of your lovely reviews. :) Sandra xx
Comment from Jay Squires
I didn't know there was a time-frame, but you're forgiven, Sandra.
Now will you forgive me for not reviewing your poetry? You're not alone, though--I just don't feel helpful in reviewing poetry.
It reads well aloud, your rhymes are spot on. And I like the parallel of the sun with smile.
I'll overlook the shadows where there is no light (allowing for poetic license ... or even street lights).
LOL, you are too good, my dear! Now start cranking out some prose!
reply by the author on 12-May-2017
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I didn't know there was a time-frame, but you're forgiven, Sandra.
Now will you forgive me for not reviewing your poetry? You're not alone, though--I just don't feel helpful in reviewing poetry.
It reads well aloud, your rhymes are spot on. And I like the parallel of the sun with smile.
I'll overlook the shadows where there is no light (allowing for poetic license ... or even street lights).
LOL, you are too good, my dear! Now start cranking out some prose!
Comment Written 12-May-2017
reply by the author on 12-May-2017
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They are supposed to be posted every two weeks on the Monday after 2 pm. So I'm a tad late! lol. Thank you so much, Jay, for your reading on my poem, I always appreciate your thoughts on my work. I haven't written for awhile, but have started again with gusto. I've started 'cranking' out some prose, LOL, and begun my sequel which I'll be posting again shortly. I want to get a couple of chapters ready before I start breaking them up into FS size parts. I hope you will be around to put me right again, my friend. ;) How is your script coming along, have you sent it to an agent? I did enjoy the story and could imagine it on the stage. Thank you again, Jay. Big hugs. Sandra xx
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Thanks for your inquiry, Sandra. I'll be submitting my play in June, I believe. Glad to hear you're going on with your prose. I'll keep an eye out--as painful as that can be.
Comment from Heather Knight
This is a lovely poem, Sandra.
I feel sorry for the poor man, I do hope he finds his lover.
Great rhyme, BTW.
Thanks for sharing.
reply by the author on 12-May-2017
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This is a lovely poem, Sandra.
I feel sorry for the poor man, I do hope he finds his lover.
Great rhyme, BTW.
Thanks for sharing.
Comment Written 12-May-2017
reply by the author on 12-May-2017
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I do too, bless him. Thank you so much, Maria, for your lovely review! :) Sandra xx
Comment from Dean Kuch
The lack of punctuation was a bit off-putting for me, Sandra.
Other than that, I felt this was a very lovely, well rhymed and poignant poetic proclamation portraying love and loss for the Potlatch Challenge Group.
Bravo~
Dean :)
reply by the author on 12-May-2017
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The lack of punctuation was a bit off-putting for me, Sandra.
Other than that, I felt this was a very lovely, well rhymed and poignant poetic proclamation portraying love and loss for the Potlatch Challenge Group.
Bravo~
Dean :)
Comment Written 12-May-2017
reply by the author on 12-May-2017
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I was wrong there and I'm sorry, Dean. I don't know why I didn't punctuate it this time. I'll do it now though. Thank you so much for your thoughts, and the lovely words. The man in the picture looked so desolate, a happy poem would have been wrong. I'm so pleased you liked it. Now to punctuate it!! Big hugs, my friend. :) Sandra xxx
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No worries, Sandra.
No hurry. :)
Comment from Ashlie Daza
The title of your poem got my attention. Reading the first few lines made me curious. I thought the man was some kind of a vigilante but actually, he was indeed a broken hearted
Individual. It was a sad ending which I felt. That's the sentimental me I guess. You did a terrific job with this poem. Keep up the amazing job. Let your pen do the talking, you are great at it.
reply by the author on 12-May-2017
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The title of your poem got my attention. Reading the first few lines made me curious. I thought the man was some kind of a vigilante but actually, he was indeed a broken hearted
Individual. It was a sad ending which I felt. That's the sentimental me I guess. You did a terrific job with this poem. Keep up the amazing job. Let your pen do the talking, you are great at it.
Comment Written 12-May-2017
reply by the author on 12-May-2017
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The picture was so desolate the words just seemed to follow. Thank you so much, Ashlie, for your really lovely review. I do appreciate it. :) Sandra xx
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You are very welcome Sandra.
Comment from bertranclan
I like your rhyme scheme and theme. I really feel badly for the character. Your words have a way of bringing out the reader's emotions. Thanks for posting.
reply by the author on 12-May-2017
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I like your rhyme scheme and theme. I really feel badly for the character. Your words have a way of bringing out the reader's emotions. Thanks for posting.
Comment Written 12-May-2017
reply by the author on 12-May-2017
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Thank you so much for your wonderful review, I'm delighted you enjoyed it. :) Sandra xxx
Comment from rosehill (Wendy)
A great job of interpreting this photo into a well rhymed poem. I enjoyed the introduction to the enigmatic character and then the reason for his lonely wanderings. Meter is perfect and the flow of thought delightful. So glad I found this. I had gone searching for others but gave up after striking out more than I succeeded. I do hope that Jackie can tackle the list so that it better represents those who are still engaged. I am a relative newcomer, but have found the writers few and far between and I haven't that much time available to sort through all the names. This was lovely. - Wendy
reply by the author on 12-May-2017
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A great job of interpreting this photo into a well rhymed poem. I enjoyed the introduction to the enigmatic character and then the reason for his lonely wanderings. Meter is perfect and the flow of thought delightful. So glad I found this. I had gone searching for others but gave up after striking out more than I succeeded. I do hope that Jackie can tackle the list so that it better represents those who are still engaged. I am a relative newcomer, but have found the writers few and far between and I haven't that much time available to sort through all the names. This was lovely. - Wendy
Comment Written 12-May-2017
reply by the author on 12-May-2017
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Hi Wendy, I was late writing this one, it was supposed to be posted last Monday. I know what you mean about finding the others, I've tried without success, only because the majority will be off now and only in their portfolios. When you post yours next time, if you haven't 'fanned' the other members, (and I haven't all of them) if you browse down through the poems until you reach the 67 cents mark, you will find them there and lower. That's why we have a limit put on the group of not using any more than 7 member pumps. You can use less, but not more. Did you write one? I'll take a look.Thank you so much for your lovely review of mine and welcome to the group! :) Sandra xx
Comment from Ben Colder
Good one, Sandy. Don't read much anymore since working on the novel but glad I saw this. Enjoyed it much. Reminded me of someone I know.
reply by the author on 12-May-2017
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Good one, Sandy. Don't read much anymore since working on the novel but glad I saw this. Enjoyed it much. Reminded me of someone I know.
Comment Written 12-May-2017
reply by the author on 12-May-2017
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Aw, Ben. I know who you refer to, and I know what you mean. Thank you so much for reading this one, my dear friend. The pain eases only fractionally, doesn't it? I used to say it was when I closed the bedroom door at night to go to sleep, that I felt the loneliness most. Thank you so much for the 6, dear friend. Remember, you are never alone even when we feel it. I hope your novel is going well, is it the one about your grandmother? I loved that story. :) Sandra xxx
Comment from damommy
This deserves my last six.
The rhyme and meter are spot on. Perfect. And what an original idea to take from this picture. Outstanding.
If I had to pick a favorite line (it's so hard), it would this: "Until that day when he woke up to grey clouds in the sky. His love had gone away, he knew not where, or even why."
You jumped back in with a bang, girl. 8-)
reply by the author on 12-May-2017
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This deserves my last six.
The rhyme and meter are spot on. Perfect. And what an original idea to take from this picture. Outstanding.
If I had to pick a favorite line (it's so hard), it would this: "Until that day when he woke up to grey clouds in the sky. His love had gone away, he knew not where, or even why."
You jumped back in with a bang, girl. 8-)
Comment Written 12-May-2017
reply by the author on 12-May-2017
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I have you to thank for that, Yvonne! Thank you so very much for the 6, my dear friend! On a Friday too, that is amazing! Yes, I am back, and I have made a good start on my sequel. See what you have done!! Biggest hugs, my friend. :) Sandra xxx
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Aww, shucks. You give me too much credit. But I'm glad you're back for whatever reason. Love, Yvonne
Comment from Thomas Bowling
I've read several of these stories based on a common picture. There is a group of talented writers on FanStory taking part in this and writing excellent posts.
reply by the author on 12-May-2017
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I've read several of these stories based on a common picture. There is a group of talented writers on FanStory taking part in this and writing excellent posts.
Comment Written 12-May-2017
reply by the author on 12-May-2017
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Thank you, Tom. It's a great group, and the challenges are fun to do. You should try it! :) Sandra xx
