Tanka (After Long Commute)
Cooking goes faster with two cooks.76 total reviews
Comment from robyn corum
Andre,
I think this is a fun tanka and I am not a big fan of most people's tanka attempts here. This celebrates a special moment and I thought you did it well. Thanks!
reply by the author on 30-Apr-2017
Andre,
I think this is a fun tanka and I am not a big fan of most people's tanka attempts here. This celebrates a special moment and I thought you did it well. Thanks!
Comment Written 30-Apr-2017
reply by the author on 30-Apr-2017
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Yes, Robyn, I chose to celebrate a special moment between two in the kitchen. Thank you for your review of a fun tanka.
Comment from sunnilicious
You should keep some canned or frozen vegetables. That sounds like a bland dinner. Great visual imagery. Well thought out and nicely written. Good luck to you. Have a nice week :)
reply by the author on 30-Apr-2017
You should keep some canned or frozen vegetables. That sounds like a bland dinner. Great visual imagery. Well thought out and nicely written. Good luck to you. Have a nice week :)
Comment Written 30-Apr-2017
reply by the author on 30-Apr-2017
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Thank you, sunnilicious, for your review. I do keep frozen peas, but seldom cook them. Thanks again.
Comment from nuthead
This tanka says a lot about the relationship between the two cooks. A supportive and compassionate one. Tired from work and commute, it is easy to be snarky and testy. Met with snark back adds fuel to the fire, whereas, understanding and compassion (like the simple gesture of suggesting an alternative herb! a solution!) is like turning off the flame. Enjoyed!
reply by the author on 30-Apr-2017
This tanka says a lot about the relationship between the two cooks. A supportive and compassionate one. Tired from work and commute, it is easy to be snarky and testy. Met with snark back adds fuel to the fire, whereas, understanding and compassion (like the simple gesture of suggesting an alternative herb! a solution!) is like turning off the flame. Enjoyed!
Comment Written 30-Apr-2017
reply by the author on 30-Apr-2017
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Yes, Shirley, you got it. There is a lot of support and compassion shared between these two cooks. Thank you for your review.
Comment from Janet Foor
Cooking definitely goes faster with two cooks. After a long commute, I think I might be to tired to cook. And so we learn to compromise.
Your exercise for class was a joy to read.
Well done
Blessings
Janet
reply by the author on 30-Apr-2017
Cooking definitely goes faster with two cooks. After a long commute, I think I might be to tired to cook. And so we learn to compromise.
Your exercise for class was a joy to read.
Well done
Blessings
Janet
Comment Written 30-Apr-2017
reply by the author on 30-Apr-2017
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Thank you, Janet, for your review. Yes, cooking goes faster with two in the kitchen.
Comment from Apostle Janos
Consideration for your significant other when they are tired is very important, and it is the little things that show real affection. I find this Tanka shows that really well through simplicity, and the intimate meaning that preparing and eating a meal conveys. I'm not sure what is the syllable count in a Gypsy's Tanka but this one is 5/7/5/6/7 if I'm not mistaken, so it needs 1 syllable more for the 4th line?
reply by the author on 30-Apr-2017
Consideration for your significant other when they are tired is very important, and it is the little things that show real affection. I find this Tanka shows that really well through simplicity, and the intimate meaning that preparing and eating a meal conveys. I'm not sure what is the syllable count in a Gypsy's Tanka but this one is 5/7/5/6/7 if I'm not mistaken, so it needs 1 syllable more for the 4th line?
Comment Written 30-Apr-2017
reply by the author on 30-Apr-2017
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Thank you, Apostle Yannaras, for your review of this simple tanka. I will check the syllable count.
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Thank you very much for your catch. I had spelled arugula incorrectly. Thanks again.
Andre
Comment from nancyrabbrose
I like the simplicity of your tanka. This is an example of "less is more". I like the sentence "I find the kitchen tired you". That is an artistic way to say that your loved one got tired while working in the kitchen. Well done.
reply by the author on 30-Apr-2017
I like the simplicity of your tanka. This is an example of "less is more". I like the sentence "I find the kitchen tired you". That is an artistic way to say that your loved one got tired while working in the kitchen. Well done.
Comment Written 30-Apr-2017
reply by the author on 30-Apr-2017
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Oh, thank you, Nancy, for your review of my less is more tanka. I appreciate your keen observation.
Comment from Benny Beeharry
After the commute,it is not easy to lift oneself to cook. Happened to me. Specially when you have run out of spices. The best way out is concoct anything for a meal.
Danny Jock
reply by the author on 30-Apr-2017
After the commute,it is not easy to lift oneself to cook. Happened to me. Specially when you have run out of spices. The best way out is concoct anything for a meal.
Danny Jock
Comment Written 30-Apr-2017
reply by the author on 30-Apr-2017
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Yes, Danny, it's hard to cook after lone commutes. Thank you for your review.
Comment from barbara.wilkey
I enjoyed reading your poem. It took almost 2 complete hours to drive home Friday evening after work. It usually only takes 26 minutes. The West bound Interstate was closed due to an accident. You poem speaks to me.
reply by the author on 30-Apr-2017
I enjoyed reading your poem. It took almost 2 complete hours to drive home Friday evening after work. It usually only takes 26 minutes. The West bound Interstate was closed due to an accident. You poem speaks to me.
Comment Written 30-Apr-2017
reply by the author on 30-Apr-2017
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Yes, Barbara, the commutes in the San Francisco area have lengthened. Thank you for your review. I am glad my poem spoke to you.
Comment from Mitchell Brontė
A wonderful Tanka which sets the joint effort of cooking a meal fantastically.
I would personally change tired to tires it just sounds better but that is just me, others may prefere tired.
Really enjoyed this..keep up the excellent writing
Have a great evening
Mitchell
reply by the author on 30-Apr-2017
A wonderful Tanka which sets the joint effort of cooking a meal fantastically.
I would personally change tired to tires it just sounds better but that is just me, others may prefere tired.
Really enjoyed this..keep up the excellent writing
Have a great evening
Mitchell
Comment Written 30-Apr-2017
reply by the author on 30-Apr-2017
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Thank you, Mitchell, for your review and suggestion. I changed tired to tires. Thanks.
Comment from Rasmine
:) Good tanka. If I ever get extra money, I'll invest in another class on here. I took Story Middles with Stacia. It was good and I would love another. :P Are you home yet? I bet you are.
reply by the author on 30-Apr-2017
:) Good tanka. If I ever get extra money, I'll invest in another class on here. I took Story Middles with Stacia. It was good and I would love another. :P Are you home yet? I bet you are.
Comment Written 30-Apr-2017
reply by the author on 30-Apr-2017
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Yes, Rasmine, I arrived home a week and a half ago. Thank you for your review.