Reviews from

Tanka (After Long Commute)

Cooking goes faster with two cooks.

76 total reviews 
Comment from Poetic Friend
Excellent
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Sis Cat,

This poem is relatable to many, especially those who work. Who wants to cook when tired? Two people cooking makes the cooking more faster and bearable. Also, like the sense of togetherness, which gets lost that days.

Thank you for the sentiments.

 Comment Written 09-May-2017


reply by the author on 09-May-2017
    Oh, thank you, Poetic Friend, for your understanding review of my poem. Yes, cooking solo after a long commute is hard.
Comment from lyenochka
Excellent
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I can certainly understand that after a long day and a long commute, it is just tiring to cook. But substituting arugula for parsley? Well, I guess that might work but quite a different flavor. Good way to capture a daily event and all that goes with it.

 Comment Written 03-May-2017


reply by the author on 03-May-2017
    Yes, lyenochka, arugula is quite a different flavor, but it beats having to go back out to the store to pick up parsley after a long commute. Thank you for your review.
Comment from kathleenspalding
Excellent
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Nice Tanka poem creates a homey scene and relaxing mood using very few words. Disclaimer: I don't remember what a tanka requires, so I trust you about that :-D. Excellent choice of artwork.

 Comment Written 03-May-2017


reply by the author on 03-May-2017
    Oh, thank you, Kathleen, for your review of my homey tanka.

    A traditional tanka has a 5-7-5-7-7 syllable count. The center line is the pivot line.

    Thanks again.
reply by kathleenspalding on 03-May-2017
    You're welcome, and thank you for sharing Tanka information. :-)
Comment from amahra
Excellent
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Um...Gypsy's Tanka. I think I'll try writing one. First, let me say, this is a fitting art work that you have chosen for this writing. I love the choice of words, and the rhythmic beat. Great job, my dear.

 Comment Written 02-May-2017


reply by the author on 02-May-2017
    Oh, thank you, Amahra, for your review. Gypsy is a great teacher.
Comment from Douglas Paul
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

I like this tanka, my friend. It reads as a commentary on everyday life with some underlying meaning - has the feel of the master's work. Very well done

 Comment Written 02-May-2017


reply by the author on 02-May-2017
    Oh, thank you, Doug, for your generous, six star review. We had a lot of fun in Gypsy's class, and I rescued this tanka from our assignments. Thanks.
Comment from Dawn Munro
Excellent
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I do love the tanka form, although my furthered instruction came from Ray (mountainwriter49) who taught me a lot, with nothing in return but my undying gratitude. He instilled in me the importance of the tanka being a poem that ends with some form of human emotion, which yours exudes wonderfully, Andre. Concrete images with a pivot line that works for both the start of the poem and the conclusion - I do like to see the pivot grammatically connect, but I enjoyed it.

 Comment Written 02-May-2017


reply by the author on 02-May-2017
    Thank you, Dawn, for your review. I am glad you enjoyed my tanka.
reply by Dawn Munro on 02-May-2017
    You're very welcome.
Comment from Selina Stambi
Excellent
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My goodness ... this wee little piece was quite lovely, Andre.

Not sure at all how you did it, but you brought out the complete tired, end-of-day feeling and the sense of togetherness in the kitchen.

Lovely!

Smiling ... :) :)

Sonali :)

 Comment Written 02-May-2017


reply by the author on 02-May-2017
    Oh, thank you, Sonali, for your review of this wee little piece. Your analysis is correct. I appreciate it.
Comment from Sanku
Excellent
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In this tanks you have painted a great picture of togetherness. coming home after work if two people can share the cooking it is so much better.the cosy kitchen intimacy increases the beauty of your tanka.

 Comment Written 02-May-2017


reply by the author on 02-May-2017
    Oh, thank you, Sanka, for your review. My tanka's togetherness has resonated with many reviewers.
Comment from Irish Rain
Excellent
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I love your tanka. This is a form I had the worst time learning, mainly I think because I was reading those that were not actually tanka's. So I couldn't 'get' them. A delight to read what I can learn from. Blessings....

 Comment Written 02-May-2017


reply by the author on 02-May-2017
    Oh, thank you, Irish Rain, for your review. I am glad it delighted and informed you.
Comment from estory
Excellent
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It's simple, clean, to the point; we feel this moment between two tired people, hungry, trying to cook a meal together. Parsley or arugula? It's not worth arguing over. Everyone just wants to eat and go to bed. Nice one estory

 Comment Written 02-May-2017


reply by the author on 02-May-2017
    Yes, estory, everyone just wants to eat and go to bed. Thank you for your review.