Tanka (After Long Commute)
Cooking goes faster with two cooks.76 total reviews
Comment from Poetic Friend
Sis Cat,
This poem is relatable to many, especially those who work. Who wants to cook when tired? Two people cooking makes the cooking more faster and bearable. Also, like the sense of togetherness, which gets lost that days.
Thank you for the sentiments.
reply by the author on 09-May-2017
Sis Cat,
This poem is relatable to many, especially those who work. Who wants to cook when tired? Two people cooking makes the cooking more faster and bearable. Also, like the sense of togetherness, which gets lost that days.
Thank you for the sentiments.
Comment Written 09-May-2017
reply by the author on 09-May-2017
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Oh, thank you, Poetic Friend, for your understanding review of my poem. Yes, cooking solo after a long commute is hard.
Comment from lyenochka
I can certainly understand that after a long day and a long commute, it is just tiring to cook. But substituting arugula for parsley? Well, I guess that might work but quite a different flavor. Good way to capture a daily event and all that goes with it.
reply by the author on 03-May-2017
I can certainly understand that after a long day and a long commute, it is just tiring to cook. But substituting arugula for parsley? Well, I guess that might work but quite a different flavor. Good way to capture a daily event and all that goes with it.
Comment Written 03-May-2017
reply by the author on 03-May-2017
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Yes, lyenochka, arugula is quite a different flavor, but it beats having to go back out to the store to pick up parsley after a long commute. Thank you for your review.
Comment from kathleenspalding
Nice Tanka poem creates a homey scene and relaxing mood using very few words. Disclaimer: I don't remember what a tanka requires, so I trust you about that :-D. Excellent choice of artwork.
reply by the author on 03-May-2017
Nice Tanka poem creates a homey scene and relaxing mood using very few words. Disclaimer: I don't remember what a tanka requires, so I trust you about that :-D. Excellent choice of artwork.
Comment Written 03-May-2017
reply by the author on 03-May-2017
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Oh, thank you, Kathleen, for your review of my homey tanka.
A traditional tanka has a 5-7-5-7-7 syllable count. The center line is the pivot line.
Thanks again.
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You're welcome, and thank you for sharing Tanka information. :-)
Comment from amahra
Um...Gypsy's Tanka. I think I'll try writing one. First, let me say, this is a fitting art work that you have chosen for this writing. I love the choice of words, and the rhythmic beat. Great job, my dear.
reply by the author on 02-May-2017
Um...Gypsy's Tanka. I think I'll try writing one. First, let me say, this is a fitting art work that you have chosen for this writing. I love the choice of words, and the rhythmic beat. Great job, my dear.
Comment Written 02-May-2017
reply by the author on 02-May-2017
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Oh, thank you, Amahra, for your review. Gypsy is a great teacher.
Comment from Douglas Paul
I like this tanka, my friend. It reads as a commentary on everyday life with some underlying meaning - has the feel of the master's work. Very well done
reply by the author on 02-May-2017
I like this tanka, my friend. It reads as a commentary on everyday life with some underlying meaning - has the feel of the master's work. Very well done
Comment Written 02-May-2017
reply by the author on 02-May-2017
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Oh, thank you, Doug, for your generous, six star review. We had a lot of fun in Gypsy's class, and I rescued this tanka from our assignments. Thanks.
Comment from Dawn Munro
I do love the tanka form, although my furthered instruction came from Ray (mountainwriter49) who taught me a lot, with nothing in return but my undying gratitude. He instilled in me the importance of the tanka being a poem that ends with some form of human emotion, which yours exudes wonderfully, Andre. Concrete images with a pivot line that works for both the start of the poem and the conclusion - I do like to see the pivot grammatically connect, but I enjoyed it.
reply by the author on 02-May-2017
I do love the tanka form, although my furthered instruction came from Ray (mountainwriter49) who taught me a lot, with nothing in return but my undying gratitude. He instilled in me the importance of the tanka being a poem that ends with some form of human emotion, which yours exudes wonderfully, Andre. Concrete images with a pivot line that works for both the start of the poem and the conclusion - I do like to see the pivot grammatically connect, but I enjoyed it.
Comment Written 02-May-2017
reply by the author on 02-May-2017
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Thank you, Dawn, for your review. I am glad you enjoyed my tanka.
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You're very welcome.
Comment from Selina Stambi
My goodness ... this wee little piece was quite lovely, Andre.
Not sure at all how you did it, but you brought out the complete tired, end-of-day feeling and the sense of togetherness in the kitchen.
Lovely!
Smiling ... :) :)
Sonali :)
reply by the author on 02-May-2017
My goodness ... this wee little piece was quite lovely, Andre.
Not sure at all how you did it, but you brought out the complete tired, end-of-day feeling and the sense of togetherness in the kitchen.
Lovely!
Smiling ... :) :)
Sonali :)
Comment Written 02-May-2017
reply by the author on 02-May-2017
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Oh, thank you, Sonali, for your review of this wee little piece. Your analysis is correct. I appreciate it.
Comment from Sanku
In this tanks you have painted a great picture of togetherness. coming home after work if two people can share the cooking it is so much better.the cosy kitchen intimacy increases the beauty of your tanka.
reply by the author on 02-May-2017
In this tanks you have painted a great picture of togetherness. coming home after work if two people can share the cooking it is so much better.the cosy kitchen intimacy increases the beauty of your tanka.
Comment Written 02-May-2017
reply by the author on 02-May-2017
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Oh, thank you, Sanka, for your review. My tanka's togetherness has resonated with many reviewers.
Comment from Irish Rain
I love your tanka. This is a form I had the worst time learning, mainly I think because I was reading those that were not actually tanka's. So I couldn't 'get' them. A delight to read what I can learn from. Blessings....
reply by the author on 02-May-2017
I love your tanka. This is a form I had the worst time learning, mainly I think because I was reading those that were not actually tanka's. So I couldn't 'get' them. A delight to read what I can learn from. Blessings....
Comment Written 02-May-2017
reply by the author on 02-May-2017
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Oh, thank you, Irish Rain, for your review. I am glad it delighted and informed you.
Comment from estory
It's simple, clean, to the point; we feel this moment between two tired people, hungry, trying to cook a meal together. Parsley or arugula? It's not worth arguing over. Everyone just wants to eat and go to bed. Nice one estory
reply by the author on 02-May-2017
It's simple, clean, to the point; we feel this moment between two tired people, hungry, trying to cook a meal together. Parsley or arugula? It's not worth arguing over. Everyone just wants to eat and go to bed. Nice one estory
Comment Written 02-May-2017
reply by the author on 02-May-2017
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Yes, estory, everyone just wants to eat and go to bed. Thank you for your review.