Al's Bar and Grill
Friends are forever27 total reviews
Comment from Sandra Stoner-Mitchell
LOL, I loved Yogi when I was a young mum. He really did come out with some good answers. I enjoyed your story, just a couple of nits to look at, and it's a great contest entry. Good luck! Sandra x
"Well(!), for example," I continued,
(")Dino chimed in, "that's deep!"
reply by the author on 02-Apr-2017
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LOL, I loved Yogi when I was a young mum. He really did come out with some good answers. I enjoyed your story, just a couple of nits to look at, and it's a great contest entry. Good luck! Sandra x
"Well(!), for example," I continued,
(")Dino chimed in, "that's deep!"
Comment Written 28-Mar-2017
reply by the author on 02-Apr-2017
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Thanks for your comments.
I appreciate your reading my story.
gsnewton77
Comment from lyenochka
Funny! You can't go wrong with quotes from Yogi Berra! Enjoyable read. I would suggest that you add a space between paragraphs and each time a new dialog begins as that would make it much easier to read.
reply by the author on 02-Apr-2017
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Funny! You can't go wrong with quotes from Yogi Berra! Enjoyable read. I would suggest that you add a space between paragraphs and each time a new dialog begins as that would make it much easier to read.
Comment Written 28-Mar-2017
reply by the author on 02-Apr-2017
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lyenochka
Thank you for your comments.
Best Wishes, gsnewton
Comment from MelB
Everybody laughed and when everybody had regained their composer, Big Al spoke up and said, "Yogi says, 'it ain't over till it's over.'" - did you mean composure?
Very good dialog and interesting questions in this contest entry. Best wishes in the contest.
reply by the author on 02-Apr-2017
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Everybody laughed and when everybody had regained their composer, Big Al spoke up and said, "Yogi says, 'it ain't over till it's over.'" - did you mean composure?
Very good dialog and interesting questions in this contest entry. Best wishes in the contest.
Comment Written 27-Mar-2017
reply by the author on 02-Apr-2017
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MelB
Thanks for the comments,
gsnewton77
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You're welcome.
Comment from Meia (MESAYERS)
"Look at it this way," I said. "Can some evil be good? In other words can some good come from evil?" He did it anyway, bless his heart.
"I think like Yogi," said Big Al 'How can you think and hit at the same time?'"
"Well I can tell you this for sure," said Dino, "before I retired, when the right one got wacked, good came from evil!" Everybody laughed and when everybody had regained their composer, Big Al spoke up and said, "Yogi says, 'it ain't over till it's over.'"
Everybody was now looking at me.
"What do you say, Mr. Norris?" asked Dino.
"I forgot the question guys. Give us another round Al."
What a fantastic write for the contest! Steeped in humour and absolutely spot on writing. I loved it and am only sorry I don't have a six to give. Kindest regards and well done Meia x
reply by the author on 27-Mar-2017
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"Look at it this way," I said. "Can some evil be good? In other words can some good come from evil?" He did it anyway, bless his heart.
"I think like Yogi," said Big Al 'How can you think and hit at the same time?'"
"Well I can tell you this for sure," said Dino, "before I retired, when the right one got wacked, good came from evil!" Everybody laughed and when everybody had regained their composer, Big Al spoke up and said, "Yogi says, 'it ain't over till it's over.'"
Everybody was now looking at me.
"What do you say, Mr. Norris?" asked Dino.
"I forgot the question guys. Give us another round Al."
What a fantastic write for the contest! Steeped in humour and absolutely spot on writing. I loved it and am only sorry I don't have a six to give. Kindest regards and well done Meia x
Comment Written 27-Mar-2017
reply by the author on 27-Mar-2017
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Hi Media x (MESAYERS)
Thank you so much for your kind review. It was worth the effort when someone likes what you've done.
Best regards, gsnewton75
Comment from Mustang Patty
Thank you for sharing this humorous story. A few things: this is supposed to be a blind entry, and you have your author information at the very beginning. Also, you may want to go back and read the contest prompt to make sure you are following the other rules,
~patty~
reply by the author on 02-Apr-2017
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Thank you for sharing this humorous story. A few things: this is supposed to be a blind entry, and you have your author information at the very beginning. Also, you may want to go back and read the contest prompt to make sure you are following the other rules,
~patty~
Comment Written 27-Mar-2017
reply by the author on 02-Apr-2017
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I APPRECIATE YOU,
GSNEWTON77
Comment from valmay
I enjoyed you entry and wish you good luck. Here's my 10 cents worth so hope they help.
First, you need to edit your title and identity out of the piece, or I think you might be disqualified from the contest.
Dino with that special 'grind' he often wore?
I thought your dialogue was believable as were your characters. All the best.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
reply by the author on 29-Mar-2017
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I enjoyed you entry and wish you good luck. Here's my 10 cents worth so hope they help.
First, you need to edit your title and identity out of the piece, or I think you might be disqualified from the contest.
Dino with that special 'grind' he often wore?
I thought your dialogue was believable as were your characters. All the best.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 27-Mar-2017
reply by the author on 29-Mar-2017
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VALMAY
Thanks for the review- I fixed a lot.
gsnewton75
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You're so very welcome
Comment from DLBoo
Better, I still see a few punctuation errors, but now with your changes it's so much easier to read. I'm able to easily see who is speaking compared to that persons feeling at the time.
Good job!
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
reply by the author on 29-Mar-2017
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Better, I still see a few punctuation errors, but now with your changes it's so much easier to read. I'm able to easily see who is speaking compared to that persons feeling at the time.
Good job!
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 27-Mar-2017
reply by the author on 29-Mar-2017
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DLBoo
I fixed a lot. Can I get a better review?
gsnewton75
